Kate Oczypok, Author at Love TV

15 Ways to Model Your Wedding Just Like Meghan and Harry’s

June 1, 2018January 22, 2024 by Kate Oczypokin LOVE, RELATIONSHIPS

Are you still swooning over the fairy tale romantic morning that was Duchess Meghan and Prince Harry’s wedding?

If you’re anything like me, you are still obsessing over every minute detail of the royal couple’s gorgeous wedding at St. George’s Chapel.

Whether you were smitten with the gaggle of children walking behind Meghan or the way Harry wiped tears from his eyes when he saw his bride for the first time, it wasn’t hard to get caught up in the absolute loveliness of it all.

For engaged couples getting married soon who want to emulate Meghan and Harry’s elegant and romantic style, here are 17 ways to do so.

1. Gather up your favorite kids as your bridesmaids and groomsmen.

Meghan and Harry used godchildren, nieces, nephews and children of their best friends. Sit down with your fiancé and think about what little ones you’d want to walk up the aisle with you. Family and friends may be surprised by your decision but it eliminates a lot of drama and money that bridesmaids and groomsmen would have to spend.

2. Use white flowers.

It may seem boring, but white flowers offer a gorgeous, romantic and clean aesthetic. The royal couple used white roses (one of Princess Diana’s favorites) and white peonies (Meghan’s favorite flower).

3. Choose a simple, classic wedding dress.

Part of what made Meghan look so incredibly amazing that day was her wedding dress. By going quite simple in Givenchy, she created a timeless style that would work in eras past and for years to come. In other words, if you want to create the romanticism of “my future daughter could wear this someday,” make like Meghan and go with a classic style.

4. In lieu of wedding gifts, offer the opportunity to donate to a charity.

Meghan and Harry asked for donations to their favorite charities instead of wedding gifts. They chose a diverse group—a charity for children who have lost a parent in the armed forces, a children’s HIV association and Surfers Against Sewage (perhaps a nod to Meghan’s home state of California). Think about your favorite charities and make a list for donations in instead of wedding gifts.

5. Think about sentimentality when it comes to your jewelry.

For her second outfit of the day, Meghan jetted off to her reception in a show-stopping Stella McCartney dress. What many noticed though was what was on her finger—Princess Diana’s aquamarine ring. Many speculated it could have been a gift from Harry and Meghan’s “something blue.” If you have heirlooms like this in your family collection, your wedding day might be time to think about wearing them.

6. Get married early in the day.

There’s something to be said for the song “Get Me to the Church on Time” from My Fair Lady. The excitement and anticipation from the morning wedding at St. George’s chapel helped nerves to get out of the way early and allowed for partying all day long. Also, there’s less of a chance of bad weather in the morning!

7. Consider marrying in a church.

Neither Harry nor Meghan are particularly religious, but they married in the historic, 500+ year old St. George’s Chapel. If you crave the beauty of having your wedding ceremony in a church just as Meghan and Harry did, consider marrying in a religious building.

8. Incorporate both of your backgrounds into your ceremony.

Part of what made Meghan and Harry’s ceremony so beautiful was that it included traditional British wedding songs and prayers, but also included Bishop Curry and his sermon that went viral and a gospel choir singing a version of “Stand By Me” that caused many to shed a tear. If your fiancé and you are from different countries like Meghan and Harry, your wedding is a wonderful time to showcase what makes you who you are.

9. Incorporate your cultures into your reception in a clever way.

Guests at the royal couple’s reception said that table names revolved around different pronunciations of the same words by Americans and the British. There was potato, tomato and oregano just to name a few. Consider fun ways like this to mash up your two families’ backgrounds.

10. Honeymoon in a quiet, secluded place.

Nothing is worse than having so many people around that your privacy is threatened, and Meghan and Harry know this all too well. They were at first rumored to be heading to Namibia, but now rumors are swirling the couple will be visiting a secluded resort in Alberta, Canada.

11. Recreate the royal couple’s wedding cake.

The lemon elderflower confection was one to remember. Luckily, if you want to budget for your wedding, HGTV offers a copycat recipe to make on your own.

12. Honor your family.

Harry is close to his brother and father and Meghan and her mother have a deep relationship. If you have that special friend or family member, don’t forget to thank them and let them know how much you love them. Harry and Meghan gave speeches, but you could always handwrite a letter to your loved ones and deliver it on your wedding day.

13. Do things your way.

When Thomas Markle turned out to not be able to make it to the wedding, Meghan opted to walk herself down half of the aisle before she met up with Prince Charles. It was a strong statement of modern feminism and showed the royal family exactly how she planned to live her life as an ex-pat. Don’t be afraid to shun tradition and plan your wedding your way.

14. Make music a central part of your ceremony.

There’s a certain romantic and emotional nature to music. It can bring you back to certain times in your life, making you remember both good times and bad. Consider adding touches of music to your ceremony as Meghan and Harry did. From the Kingdom Choir to 19-year-old cellist Sheku Kanneh-Mason, everything was picture perfect at St. George’s Chapel that day.

15. Don’t be afraid to show your affection.

Weddings don’t have to be stuffy! Harry and Meghan are known for their adorable PDA and single-handedly have made kissing and holding hands in public sweet again.

Meghan and Harry ushered in a new generation of British royalty when they married.

It was hard not to get caught up in the breathtaking, romantic wedding that was Harry and Meghan’s big day. If you are getting married soon or newly engaged, these 15 suggestions are great ways to model your nuptials just like the modern fairy-tale that was the royal couple’s.

Can’t get enough Harry and Meghan? Check out this essay on how the duo are the perfect example of a modern, empowered couple.

From My First Date to My Last and Everything in Between: What I learned in 15 years of dating

June 4, 2018January 22, 2024 by Kate Oczypokin DATING ADVICE, RELATIONSHIPS

From 13 to 28-years-old, I’ve had 15 years of dating. So, here’s what it has taught me.

My first date ever happened when I was 13 years old. It was a double date to see She’s All That and I remember I was so nervous. Fifteen years later, I had what I hope will be my last first date ever.

Here is my journey of dating, and the lessons I learned and don’t forget that we’re here at LOVE TV to help you to sort through the dating world. Join today.

She’s All That, 1999

As soon as I saw the preview for She’s All That, I knew I had to see it. I identified with Rachael Leigh Cook’s nerdy Laney Boggs and the awesome ‘90s soundtrack (hello “Kiss Me”) had me sold.

I called my best friend at the time and we soon orchestrated a double date with two guys we were into. She had turned 14 in December and I was still 13 for another six months.

I remember being so nervous calling the boys to organize the outing and freaking out teenage girl style when they said yes. We were too anxious to order food but we did have slushies and in typical eighth grader fashion, we didn’t even hold hands. We laughed through the movie and I felt myself blushing when I’d accidentally brush my guy’s hand.

When the movie was over, I remember feeling such a relief that it was done. I was happy that my first date was over and I managed to make it a double date at that. It’s fun to think about the shared experience the four of us had that winter in 1999. Firsts are always hard, but when they turn out as fun as this date did, it made me excited for my romantic future.

Prom, 2003

Four years later, when prom time came around, I was no longer wishing for romantic dates just like the movies. I went to an all-girls high school which I absolutely adored, but one thing about it bugged me.

I’m not sure if this has changed, but 15 years ago they required us to have a date. I didn’t know very many guys and all I wanted to do was go to prom with my friends. I love laughing at my picture of myself and the date I ended up going with—a friend of a friend I think. He wore a top hat and sported a cane and he was a good six inches shorter than me.

I barely hung out with him during the dance. Instead, I spent the night with my friends, dancing and having fun.

It was nice to know that I could have a good time without having a “date” per se.

Founder’s Day Ball, 2004 and a Late-Night Diner Dinner, 2007

Sometimes dates have outcomes you’d expect.

When I started college, I met a great guy who was also from Pittsburgh. Being the naive 18-year-old that I was, I instantly felt a connection that I hoped would become romantic.

I remember calling my sisters the night before the boy and I decided to go to our college’s Founder’s Day Ball. They were giddy with excitement, wondering what the night would bring. Soon enough, I realized we were much, much better as friends and we never actually dated beyond taking each other to things like school dances.

In the meantime, I found a wonderful friend in the process who has shared so many amazing memories with me.

Three years later, I briefly (I’m talking a month and a half) actually dated another man I had become close to during my college years. I remember one night we went out to a late-night dinner at a local diner we loved. I was very forward and flirtatious and remember trying to play footsie under the table and saying things I couldn’t believe were coming out of my mouth.

It was nice to know I had the confidence to be so sure of myself when it comes to matters of the heart. Our dates were fun, innocent and spontaneous—a nighttime trip to Dairy Queen or our local movie theater. However, speaking of matters of the heart, when we broke up it was the first time I felt truly heartbroken. While dating the boy didn’t exactly have the outcome I expected, I ended up becoming great friends with him as well.

Just those few dates with those boys resulted in a friend group that rivaled the Three Musketeers, This is Us’ Big Three, basically any friendship group of three you can think of. Those two boys turned out to be two of my very best, dearest friends. It’s funny to think about the surprising ways life can take you and turn out to be way better than you ever thought.

The most romantic date ever, 2011

While the relationship didn’t turn out with any positives except a story in a local magazine, the one I had in 2011 brought me the most romantic date I’ve ever had. As a self-described hopeless romantic, I thought going to visit my boyfriend while he was away in Chicago was straight out of a movie.

The weekend I was there, he took me to the Navy Pier and as we rode to the top of the Ferris wheel where we shared a passionate kiss. I will always appreciate the date and refer to it as “that one time I felt like I was living in a romantic comedy.”

My first and only blind date, 2012

2012 was a tough year, as it was the year I got laid off due to budget cuts from the newspaper I was working at. While it was tough, it was also a great year because it was the year I met my current boyfriend.

The woman who worked at my apartment building’s front desk was friends with my boyfriend’s coworker, who happened to live in my building. They both agreed we would be good for each other and slipped a Starbucks gift card under my door.

My boyfriend and I met at the Starbucks at the end of my block and ended up chatting for hours. Six years later and we are still together and I’ve got a good feeling that that evening at Starbucks was my last first date.

Dating can be challenging, but so many important life lessons are learned.

Whether it’s getting over the fear of my first date, wishing I didn’t need a date at all, gaining confidence, appreciating romance or finding my forever date, I’ve learned so much with the men I’ve dated. As scary as it is to put yourself out there, it’s totally and completely worth it.

Interested in getting out of a not-so-great date? Check out this piece.

Tradition and Dating: What I Learned about Happily Ever After

June 14, 2018January 22, 2024 by Kate Oczypokin DATING ADVICE, RELATIONSHIPS

Being a self-professed traditionalist in dating may not be the correct way to describe myself after all.

All my life my family teased me about how much I valued tradition. Whether it was holidays or dating or following certain etiquette rules, I always placed a lot of value on certain customs. Little did I know, maybe I’m a little more modern than I think.

Here is my journey of being a traditionalist in the world of dating:

The value of a title

These days, most people date casually or just hook up and don’t worry about titles. Some don’t even bother with getting married. I always wished for the marriage and kids thing and when I was young, while watching sitcoms like Full House and later dramas like Dawson’s Creek, I always wanted a boyfriend.

Fast forward to years later. I didn’t date anyone in high school so college was my first experience learning what I wanted in a relationship. I ended up getting into a very brief relationship with one of my best friends. We are still close today which is really nice. What’s even nicer is the way he asked me to be his girlfriend. It was romantic, innocent and one of the kindest things anyone has ever done for me.

It was our senior year of high school and I had just moved out of a hellish suite situation into a double room with a roommate who was never there. I was watching Mona Lisa Smile in my room just relaxing on a Saturday night. I suddenly looked down at my (dating myself here) Motorola RAZR and saw a text from a friend that my male friend was in her room, nervously eating chicken nuggets and sipping vodka. With a slight push and support from her, he was going to ask me to be his girlfriend.

Cue Laura Linney in Love, Actually (fast forward to about 2:07 in that clip to know what I mean) laying there in my uncomfortable dorm twin bed. My friend took so long to work up the guts to ask me to be his girlfriend that I got almost entirely through Mona Lisa Smile again.

He finally walked in and didn’t say a word, just putting in the Phantom of the Opera movie remake, fast forwarding to the “All I Ask of You” scene. After that, he put in my worn When Harry Met Sally DVD, fast forwarding to the last scene where Harry professes his love to Sally, saying things like “I love that it takes you an hour and a half to order a sandwich.” I suppose he saw us as Harry and Sally at that point in our lives, and knowing it’s my favorite movie of all time, he ran with it.

After that, he asked me to be his girlfriend and we kissed for a long time, eventually falling asleep after talking all night. I woke up and was nearly late for church the next morning, but I couldn’t stop smiling.

Moving forward another few years, I met my current boyfriend. After having a first date at Starbucks and more wonderful dinner dates at our respective apartments, I was out covering a lunch for my former job working for a newspaper.

Things were quite typical of the lunches I covered and I was getting a little bored and restless. I felt my phone vibrate in my purse and reached down to check it. I saw a text from my boyfriend that read: “I had a great time last night.” I smiled and responded: “Me too.” He wrote back, “You know what I was just thinking?” I quickly typed back a question mark, careful not to be too conspicuous. He wrote back: “That I have the best girlfriend ever.” He included a smiley face at the end.

I don’t remember much else of that day, nor anything about that lunch, but I will always remember it was May 10, 2012 and once again, I couldn’t stop smiling.

Call me old-fashioned…

I’ve always thought how cool it would be to save myself until marriage. I am a huge sucker for those old Notebook-esque couples who have only one sexual partner—each other. To me at least, there’s just such a beauty and pure romance to it all. Not that I don’t mind if others have more than one partner, I am a strong component of the phrase “You do you.” I just know that for me, it’s always something I thought I want to do.

I still have managed to save myself for marriage. My boyfriend, who also grew up with similar values, has been fully and completely respectful of my decision and thinks it’s pretty cool if we make it. While we’re working on the next step of our relationship, I honestly am happy I didn’t give in and go for it with some guys—guys like this one who walked me back to my apartment after a date and suggested an after dinner drink.

I mixed us drinks and as we got about halfway through them, he went for it and tried to start going hot and heavy. I knew exactly where it was going and I quickly wriggled my way out from underneath him. I explained that I’d at least like to get to know him first before having sex, a standard I knew I had at least wanted to hold onto, no matter how much I fell for a guy.

He left hurriedly and ultimately ghosted me. I am relieved I didn’t give in and just go for it because I knew I’d regret it.

Then there’s another guy I dated for about six months. He never wanted to meet my family and when I went to visit him in Chicago for a weekend, he didn’t want to be in any photos. It was like I went on a weekend trip with myself. The only evidence I have of him there is a faint reflection of him in my sunglasses as he snapped my photo on a boat.

While I definitely “did” more with him than the first guy, I am glad I didn’t go any further. He clearly didn’t love me and that was fine. I’m just lucky I realized it early on, and got some pizza in the process.

These times were two instances I could honestly say that I am glad I call myself a traditionalist.
…Or Maybe Not

After mapping out how I wanted to write this essay, I realized that maybe I am not so traditional after all. For someone who places so much value on the steps from when you first meet someone to marriage, I moved in with my boyfriend after dating for just a year. After a lot (and I mean a lot) of decision-making, I had a good gut feeling about the move. I knew in my heart it was the right thing to do, tradition or not.

Also, I realized how untraditional our actual relationship is. As much as I would like to get married someday, when people ask if I’m happy, I can honestly say I am. We’ve got a nice little family going on, with my boyfriend and our elderly English bulldog. That’s a lot more than most people have, which often reminds me just how much I get the warm and fuzzy feeling when the three of us are spending a cozy Saturday night together on the couch. It’s comfortable, it’s easy and it’s romantic in its own way. I realize now that happily ever after doesn’t necessarily mean engaged, married, babies—it could be a far less traditional decades-long relationship, dogs and a whole lot of Netflixing on the couch.

While thinking about this topic, I had the realization that what’s important is making sure you’re happy. Who cares what others think when it comes to your relationship, whether you’re traditional or completely out there (a Charlotte or Samantha, if you may). Most of us are in that nice in-between sweet spot anyway.

Happy dating!

Interested in learning more about dating in the modern age? Check out this piece, a talk with LOVE TV’s Karinna Karsten.

My Dating and Relationship History Plays like a Spotify List

July 19, 2018January 22, 2024 by Kate Oczypokin DATING ADVICE, RELATIONSHIPS

Sometimes, my dating and relationships history reads like a Spotify playlist.

From Mariah Carey’s “Butterfly” in seventh grade to Bruno Mars’ “Just the Way You Are” and everything in between, songs in my life have the power to transport me to romantic memories both good and bad. Music has such a nostalgic quality in our lives that I set out to examine it when it comes to love.

Here is my journey of songs that mean a lot to me.

“Butterfly” by Mariah Carey

Remember in The Notebook when all it took was the memory of the piano for Allie to have just a glimpse of the past? There are hints that music can help dementia patients remember, as this article states. For most of us with healthy brains, the article quotes a professor of neurology saying that music is a “very, very vivid way of reanimating memories.”

Cue 20 years ago, during a seventh grade dance. Before fast Internet and iPhones, junior high dances were the place to be. I had gotten all dolled up in my best butterfly clips and Lane Bryant jeans and brightly colored shirt and hoped my crush would dance with me. Miraculously, later that night he approached me during a song I could only identify as Mariah Carey’s voice. After having to ask the DJ the name of the song, I figured out it was called “Butterfly.”

Needless to say, I spent the rest of junior high completely obsessed with butterflies. I wouldn’t let my parents tear down the ugly ‘70s butterfly print wallpaper in my room from the old owners in our house. I was drawn to every t-shirt that had butterflies on it. My first email address was butterflygrl11@hotmail.com. I was so obsessed with the memories of a song that I tried to hold onto it as much as I could.

The following year, I found out that my crush had just asked me to be nice—he really didn’t have any interest in me. I was devastated back then, but now I always look back on those “butterfly years” fondly.

“Let it Be” by The Beatles

This one still has a bit of mixed emotions as far as memories. I was visiting an ex-boyfriend in Chicago one summer and after a night at the Navy Pier, he asked if I wanted to head back to his apartment to watch fireworks. He was in a gorgeous rental that his parents had found for him with floor to ceiling windows. I of course agreed, imagining the spectacular view of the pier from his window.

We tore off our sweaty clothes, still damp from the humid July air. As I snuggled into his bed in my underwear, he asked if I wanted some music on. I said sure, why not? We were listening to The Beatles when all of the sudden the sky just lit up in beautiful color. Listening to “Let it Be” that night while the fireworks exploded from the pier in front of us was absolute perfection. Everytime I hear that song I think of this moment, then later, another moment comes to life.

That same boyfriend had just broken up with me. I was working at a Starbucks near Capitol Hill in between covering events for my old job. “Let it Be” came on their radio and I remember tears just coming and coming. I was unhappy that I was newly single on top of being stressed about the uncertainty of whether or not I’d have my job in the next six months.

This song contradicts a finding in a BBC article that its often pop music that brings back memories from times in our lives. While The Beatles are arguably pop, they were purposefully put on by someone, making it more of what the article calls a “reminiscence bump.” Classic hits take us back to our teens and 20s, especially important times in our lives. This makes sense, given I was 26 at the time.

“Forever” by Chris Brown

Chris Brown’s personal life aside, I’ve loved the song ever since The Office parodied the original viral video in their Jim and Pam wedding episode. While this song doesn’t evoke any romantic dating or relationships stories, it always makes me recall when my two best friends and I would get together to watch The Office on Thursday nights.

Sometimes my boyfriend and their girlfriends would join us, or we’d extend the group to other friends. More often than not, it was just the three of us. It was a time in my life I felt protected and loved by two very good friends. There was no drama, it was just the three of us, 20-somethings about to conquer the world. Oh and side note—I also still really miss The Office.

“Just the Way You Are” by Bruno Mars

This is one of my more recent musical memories. My current boyfriend and I had just celebrated our first anniversary and we were at the wedding of two of my best friends. It was a magnificently romantic night at one of Washington, D.C.’s most splendid buildings. We were out on the dance floor, him doing what I like to call “the white man’s overbite” (thanks When Harry Met Sally!) and me laughing with friends. When Bruno Mars’ “Just the Way You Are” came on, we both looked at each other as couples started pairing off. We found each other and started slow dancing. I remember hanging on every word Bruno sang that night and as we were forehead to forehead, I secretly hoped that our wedding would be next.

Moving Forward

It looks like recalling memories through music won’t be a phenomenon that’s going away anytime soon. In June 2018, the Grammy Museum announced they would award $200,000 in grants to 14 recipients in the U.S. and Canada for research and support on topics like how neural integration through music helps long-term memory.

What are some of your favorite songs from your past?

Want to read more on music and love? Check out this piece about the benefits music has on sex.

Learning Self-Love During Swimsuit Season

August 13, 2018January 22, 2024 by Kate Oczypokin Body, LOVE, Wellness

I’ve always been a bigger person and being in a bathing suit has often made me self conscious.

Ever since I was little, I’ve always been bigger than my peers. Now that I’m in my 30s, it’s something I’ve gotten used to over time and have fully embraced now that the body positive movement is so prevalent.

My journey toward self-love in a bathing suit was a long, but ultimately fulfilling one.

11 in my Leopard Plus Print

Growing up, boutiques like Charlotte Russe and Wet Seal were out of the question. In middle school I was well off the charts for both height and weight, which ultimately gave my mom the only choice but to try taking me to Macy’s. Back then, the only plus-size options were in the women’s department. The options were slim. I remember standing in a dressing room at about 11 years old, trying on a leopard print tank suit. I noticed the label on the suit said it had a “bust minimizer.” I was 11 and barely had a bust, why did I need a bust minimizer? It was frustrating and made me sad. You know that scene from This is Us where Kate wore a t-shirt at the pool around the same age? It definitely made me emotional because I identified with it so much.

My mom later ended up cutting out the minimizer so I could feel like the small hills I did have for breasts meant something. At 11, that meant a lot to me. I still remember feeling like I didn’t love my bathing suit. Compared to my peers, I was in a leopard-print suit while they donned bright colors and Lisa Frank bikinis. Since I didn’t love my suit, my confidence was definitely not the best.

Sweet 16, Self Conscious Pool Party

Despite not being comfortable in a bathing suit, I still chose to have my 16th birthday party as a pool party. My parents had built a backyard pool four years prior, and I longed to have a Sweet 16 just like I saw in the movies. I convinced them to hire a DJ and let me invite 30 friends. N’SYNC, Britney, Christina and the Backstreet Boys blared from speakers on our patio and the pool was hopping. I wanted to wear a chic blue halter-style tankini and felt just the teensiest bit confident in it.

Once my friends came and cover-ups started coming off I was immediately self-conscious. The truth is, we were all different body shapes and types but to my 16-year-old self, I was the nearly six-foot-tall, 280 lb. giant.

During the party, we played Truth or Dare and Seven Minutes in Heaven (okay more like three) in this gigantic inflatable rocket float that you could climb inside. My friends tried to no avail to get my crush to go into the rocket with me but he refused. I wanted desperately to have my first kiss and wondered if maybe I’d have to continue waiting impatiently. There was just something so special about getting my first kiss on my 16th birthday though.

After cake and ice cream (where most of my photos have me crossing my arms over my stomach), a male friend of mine at the party approached me and said he’d heard I didn’t get my first kiss. He asked to give it to me instead. I briefly considered saying no, as it wasn’t someone I was romantically attracted to, but I let my teenage hormones take the lead. I said yes and that kiss, that pizza and Surge soda tasting kiss, helped me become slightly less self conscious about my body.

Body Positive Now

It’s been 22 summers since that day I spent in a dressing room with my leopard print tank suit. I bought my first bikini a couple years ago from Forever 21’s plus-size department. I was so scared to wear it to my apartment complex’s pool. The thin stripe of my stomach that hadn’t seen the light of day for decades made me so nervous. I realized though that what was important was that the two piece suit made me happy. For once, I actually felt confident in a bathing suit.

In recent years, the body positive movement has taken off. I admire women like Hunter McGrady and Tess Holliday and have personally had the opportunity to interview Chrissy Metz and speak with Ashley Graham at a party. I even nerded out and asked her for a picture that day—see below.

I am so grateful I can sign onto social media and see girls who look like me celebrated. Even more importantly, I am glad middle and high school girls have access to much better fashion than I did and gorgeous, smart, talented and kind women like these ladies to look up to. I’ve learned that everybody and every body deserves to be in a swimsuit.

Not to sound cliché, but life’s too short to care about what other people think of you as you’re sipping a margarita poolside with your best friends. Don’t miss out on making memories because you’re embarrassed about thighs that touch, a flat chest or a full belly. It took me some time, but I know now most people embrace others no matter what they look like. Summer is meant for fun so don’t stop having it because of a body hang up. You know what the kids say these days…YOLO.

Learning self-love is hard, especially during swimsuit season

Sometimes, it’s hard to put on that bathing suit. Girls are so hard on themselves, author Kate Oczypok included.

Kate takes us on her journey learning to love her body in a swimsuit.

Want to read more on the body positive movement? Check out this piece on how big girls should be able to wear bikinis.

7 Life Lessons I Learned About Men From My Two Best Friends

September 1, 2018January 22, 2024 by Kate Oczypokin LOVE, RELATIONSHIPS

Some of my greatest life lessons about men I’ve learned from two of my greatest friends.

From tough love to being emotional to not caring about what other people think, I spent my 20s figuring out who I was and learning a lot about the opposite sex, all because of the great relationships I forged with my two best friends, who happened to be male.

Here are just a few of the many things I’ve learned about men from my two wonderful friends.

1. Tough Love

I grew up with three sisters, so I know the art of tactful criticism. While they helped me decide what outfits looked best (or chuckled as I went out of the house in atrocious getups), it was my two best male friends who really got me out of my comfort zone to try new things. While women are encouraging and plenty do provide such “tough” love I write about, with men it was a blunt sense of me facing my fears and a simple yes or no if I was going to conquer something.

I’ll never forget when we were all just a few years out of college. One of my friends and I met for burgers at a local place we enjoyed when we were in school. Afterwards, we walked up into the parking lot and he got into the passenger seat of the car. I questioned what he was doing and he said “drive around the parking lot and then I’ll take you home.” He knew that I had never really learned how to drive when I was 16 and was always too scared. He knew I had my permit and had never bothered to keep trying for my license.

A year or so later, my other friend offered to give me driving lessons. I was so scared one evening to drive on some main roads back to my apartment but my friend refused to do it. He said I had to try at least once. He even played Miley Cyrus’s “The Climb” to make me laugh and feel more at ease.

If it wasn’t for these two pushing me to do something I was terrified of, I would’ve never gotten my license (at 27, but still!).

2. Men can be deeply emotional.

There are so many stereotypes out there that men aren’t emotional creatures. There are countless shows and movies where men don’t share their feelings and instead just feel like sitting in front of the television and would rather “watch the game” instead.

I learned that is definitely not true. In the simplest of moments, men can be very emotional. On the way to get frozen yogurt years ago, one of my friends picked me up and told me to check his glove compartment; he wanted to get my opinion on something. I opened it up carefully and saw a ring box. He was so excited about asking his girlfriend to marry him that he relayed what he was going to do and wanted to show me how the ring looked. It was beautiful (and so was the proposal!) and five years later they are still deeply in love.

My other friend also had quiet moments of emotion, whether it was calling me in tears when his grandfather had passed, or being on the phone with me for hours in college and just out of school, talking about everything from relationships, our thoughts on the opposite sex, adoption, our families and more.

3. Men don’t care what other people think.

I spent my 20s constantly worried about what others thought about me. I wanted to be like the women I saw in magazines and would constantly compare myself to others. More often than not, when my friends would comment that they thought another woman was attractive, I would start obsessively wondering what made her attractive and how I could emulate that. My thought process was “they’re men, they like that, that’s what men want.”

It wasn’t until they finally blurted out “we like you for who you are!” (more than once) that I woke up. They told me part of what made them like me was that I was true to myself and my own person. I realized I shouldn’t change for what I think is a standard of attractiveness. After all, beauty is in the eye of the beholder, right?

4. Men can be more weary of men than women are.

Any date I went on, I knew I could count on my two BFFs to have my back. Whether questioning why a guy I was with wouldn’t get too close (he turned out to be gay) or warning me not to get too close because “guys can be stupid,” I knew I could rely on them to help me navigate my love life.

One particular example was when I met a guy at a Christmas party and later got drinks with him after the holidays. It was late, after a work event, and the guy walked me back to my apartment. He tried to go farther than I wanted so I ultimately ended up sending him away and he ghosted me. When he left that night, I remember checking my phone and seeing lots of missed calls and text messages. The two were wondering if I was okay because I hadn’t texted or called. When I filled them in, they both were relieved and said they knew he seemed a little shady. Leave it to my guys to be a better judge of male character than I was that night!

5. Sometimes men just need to be by themselves.

This lesson has helped me immensely in my current relationship. As a young woman, I frequently craved social interaction. I wanted to over-analyze everything and chat about nothing. At first, I would get upset when my friends would say they needed time to be by themselves. I would be frustrated and upset if they would cave on plans and instead I’d find out they went somewhere by themselves.

My one friend nicknamed some of his solo outings “solo creeps.” He explained that they helped him clear his head and just get out and away from people for a bit. He would come back refreshed and happier. I began to understand and now have adopted the outing a bit for myself—I often see movies alone or go out for breakfast by myself.

6. Men care more about how they look than you think.

Before I became so close to my friends, I spent my teenage years thinking like Cher Horowitz in Clueless, that men don’t care about how they dress. This is indeed not true—I can’t tell you how many conversations I had about different articles of clothing, a certain haircut they had and more with my guy friends.

7. Men don’t sweat the small stuff.

This was a huge one in my 20s. I remember getting a horrible haircut and being so upset, I swore I’d wear my hair in a ponytail for weeks—it was already bad enough my head was too big to wear a hat. I took my hair down from my ponytail and my friends both agreed they couldn’t tell a single difference in my appearance. My mouth dropped in disbelief.

Sometimes when little things would go wrong in our plans, I would get so upset. The easy, breezy air my friends had made me realize that little things are really not worth worrying about.

Now I remember back to those days whenever little things start getting under my skin. By not sweating the small stuff, I’m ultimately a lot happier.

Want to read more on relationships? Check out this piece about not letting your insecurities get the best of you.

10 of the Sexiest Cocktails to Get You in the Mood

October 5, 2018January 22, 2024 by Kate Oczypokin Sex, SEX TIPS

Sure, going to a fancy bar is fun and all but there’s something adventurous about making cocktails at home.

I’ve always loved strong, traditional drinks like martinis and manhattans. My boyfriend on the other hand prefers sweeter cocktails. I was inspired to compile a list of delicious cocktails with sexy names that look and taste equally sexy and yummy.

Here are 10 of the sexiest cocktails to get you in the mood.

1. The French Kiss

Remember how risqué French kissing was in junior high? Relive those innocent times with this cocktail.

Recipe: 1 oz. gin, ¾ oz. St. Germain, ¼ oz. Aperol, ¼ oz. lemon juice, top with sparkling rosé and garnish with an orange twist.

Best for: cozy snuggling at Netflix, role playing your junior high days in your old uniform skirt

2. The Hanky Panky

The name of this cocktail speaks for itself. The strong and vaguely citrusy flavor will get you relaxed and feeling sensual.

Recipe: 1.5 oz Martini Rosso vermouth, 1.5 oz. Bombay Sapphire gin, garnish with an orange peel. Stir ingredients in a mixing glass, strain into a chilled martini glass and then garnish.

Best for: before a night out with the girls, a fancy dinner at home with your significant other

3. Between the Sheets

Remember the best sex you ever had? Channel that feeling again with this tantalizing beverage, a take on the classic sidecar.

Recipe: 1 oz. white rum, 1 oz. triple sec, ¼ oz. lemon juice, 1 oz. cognac. Shake the rum, triple sec, juice and cognac with cracked ice then strain into a chilled cocktail glass and garnish with an orange peel.

Best for: sipping after a romp between your own sheets, making before a fancy party with your significant other.

4. Afternoon Delight

If you’ve ever fantasized about leaving work in the middle of the day for a long lunch—and dessert in the form of a quickie—then mixing up this drink is a great idea.

Recipe: 3 oz. Bacardi 151 rum, 3 oz. Southern Comfort peach liqueur, 16 oz., cranberry juice, 16 oz., Gatorade, 2 oz. ginger ale

Best for: actually leaving work early for a little “afternoon delight.”

5. The Full Monty

If bums are your thing, you’ll want to celebrate your love of them with this cocktail.

Recipe: 1 measure Smirnoff vodka, 1 measure Galliano liqueur, cracked ice and grated ginger or gingseng. Shake the vodka and Galliano over ice until it’s well frosted. Strain into chilled cocktail glass and sprinkle with ginger or ginseng.

Best for: before shaking your bottom at the club, dancing in front of your mirror while getting ready.

6. Amaretto-Cranberry Kiss

The nostalgia, romance and sexiness of the holiday season are rolled into one with this drink.

Recipe: (makes 8 cocktails) 2 cups cranberry juice cocktail, 1 cup vodka, ½ cup amaretto, 3 tbsp. Orange juice, ice cubes and clementines, peeled and separated into segments

Best for: being paired with your favorite red dress this holiday season.

7. Strawberries & Cream

This cocktail is meant to be enjoyed poolside in your favorite bikini with your partner. The drink is crisp and refreshing.

Recipe: 2 oz. strawberry vodka, 1 ½ oz. whipped vodka, 2 strawberries, thinly sliced (+ more for extra garnishes), soda water. In a shaker, add ice and both vodkas, shake and set aside. Uddle the strawberries and then fill the glass with ice and top of vodka. Stir gently and garnish with an additional strawberry.

Best for: summertime soireés, after-hours skinny dipping with your love.

8. Vanilla Old-Fashioned

Sometimes good old vanilla sex is just what you want. Adding a tasty matching cocktail makes things more fun.

Recipe: ¼ oz. simple syrup, 3 dashes Angostura bitters, 3 dashes orange bitters, orange peel twist, 1 ½ oz. vanilla whiskey. In an old-fashioned glass, combine the simple syrup and bitters. Fill glass halfway with ice, then stir. Add enough ice to fill the glass then squeeze an orange peel over the glass to extract oils, add peel to the glass then add whiskey. Stir just until the drink is cold and serve.

Best for: Good old-fashioned vanilla sex with your partner, a nightcap.

9. Sweet Orange + Tequila Cocktail

The first sign of spring and warmer weather always gets everyone in the mood. This equally sweet and strong cocktail is the perfect way to ring in sunnier weather.

Recipe: 1 oz. triple sec, 1 ½ oz. 1800 Blanco Tequila, 2 oz. orange juice, 3 oz. tonic water, navel orange slice, ice. Put triple sec, tequila, OJ, tonic water and ice into a cocktail shaker. Stir with a long-handled bar spoon. Strain into a chilled margarita glass filled with crushed ice. Garnish with a slice of navel orange.

Best for: that first dinner on the patio together, making out under the stars on a warm night.

10. Bit of Tongue

Surprised and a bit turned on, there’s always that first time your new boyfriend or girlfriend and you are making out and they slip you a bit of tongue. This drink recreates all that uncertainty and excitement.

Recipe: 1 oz. aperol, ¾ oz. grapefruit shrub, 1 bar spoon of Copper & Kings absinthe superior, cava to top.

Best for: the first time you invite your new boyfriend or girlfriend over for drinks.

Cocktails taste even better when you make them yourself. Get in a sexy mood with these 10 drinks.

Why Young Hollywood is Getting Engaged and Married Super Early…Should You?

October 11, 2018January 22, 2024 by Kate Oczypokin LOVE, RELATIONSHIPS

You’ve seen the headlines—Pete and Ariana, Justin and Haley—young Hollywood seem to be getting engaged and married earlier than ever.

As someone who is most likely going to marry later in life, I was intrigued by the trend of young Hollywood starting to engage and marry young. It worked decades ago, will it work now? Here is an examination of young Hollywood and everything you’ll want to know about marrying young.

Here is an examination of young Hollywood and everything you’ll want to know about marrying young.

Pete Davidson and Ariana Grande

The Saturday Night Live star, 24, and singer had a quick courtship and within weeks were engaged. Davidson told Variety that he never planned to get married. He also never thought he’d meet anyone like Grande, calling her the “coolest, hottest, nicest person” he’s ever met. Davidson constantly gushes about how lucky he is to be engaged to Grande (most recently he appeared on the season premiere of SNL talking about it).

Grande, 25, has seemed just as equally smitten with Davidson. She named a song after him on her newest album Sweetener. She also admitted on an episode of The Tonight Show with Jimmy Fallon that she had a big crush on Davidson from the time she first met him while hosting SNL. She even joked to a manager that she would “marry him” one day.

Justin Bieber and Hailey Baldwin

The “Baby” singer, 24, and Baldwin, a model, married in mid September 2018 after almost a decade of being on-again, off-again. The two first met back in 2009 at The Today Show and were introduced by Baldwin’s dad Stephen. Baldwin, 24, and Bieber stayed in touch and by 2014, the two were denying that they were dating.

By January 2016, the two became “Insta” official. Throughout the next few years, Bieber and Baldwin went quiet, around the time he reignited his relationship with Selena Gomez. Finally, in May 2018 they became friendly again and four months later, they wed.

Joe Jonas and Sophie Turner and Nick Jonas and Priyanka Chopra

While Joe was 28 when he asked Turner to marry him. Turner, however, was just 21. The two became “official” in January 2017 when Turner Instagrammed a photo of Jonas holding a cigar on a boat in Miami.

News of the relationship came out officially in June 2017 when it was reported Joe was “taking the relationship very seriously.”

Joe’s brother Nick, 26, took the opposite route and asked the 10-years-his-senior actress Priyanka Chopra. Despite having four years left until he hits 30, Nick is known in his age group as mature.

Why might they be getting engaged and married young?

Think of it this way—many of us wait nowadays to marry in order to establish ourselves in our careers and earn money. Celebrities like Justin Bieber and the Jonas brothers may be engaged and married because they’ve found their success already at such a young age. They managed to make millions before even being eligible to vote or drive.

This article from E News said it best: famous people in their early 20s sort of grow up in reverse. While they were busy earning money we were teenagers with our first cell phones, watching the beginnings of reality TV.

If you’re worried about whether or not you’re settling down later in life, don’t fret. These celebrities never had their teenage years like we did. They grew up in the spotlight where every little move they made was scrutinized. We were allowed to mess up, date and become our own people with a sense of anonymity.

In fact, we are all actually in the majority. According to a Pew Research Center study, the median age of a first marriage in the country has risen to 27 and 29 for women and men. Four decades ago the ages were 20 and 23, respectively.

For celebs who crave traditionality, getting engaged and married may be one of the few “normal” things they do in their lives.

Is marrying young right for you?

If your significant other and you are young and thinking about getting married, it’s important to think about a few things before you take the plunge. To give you a bit of hope, a research study by the National Institutes of Health said that the ages of 22 to 25 is the alleged sweet spot to get married (so perhaps there’s hope for young Hollywood!).

Wanting kids is another reason for marrying young. Just think, you’re younger and most likely healthier and more energetic, making it easier to run after little ones.

While marrying young is often a controversial topic, it’s crucial to think not only about age when you decide to get engaged. Your partner should share similar values as you, be able to tell you everything and vice versa, respect you and make you strive to be the best version of yourself. After all, age really is just a number, right?

17 Affordable Dates to Celebrate Fall

October 31, 2018January 22, 2024 by Kate Oczypokin DATING ADVICE, RELATIONSHIPS

After a long and hot summer, it’s time to celebrate fall with some cozy dates.

I’ve always enjoyed everything about fall. From pumpkins to bonfires to a new season of tv, there’s something cozy and fun about autumn.

Here are 17 affordable dates to ring in fall, from sweet to sexy.

1. Go pumpkin spice latte tasting.

Grab a pumpkin spice latte from area coffee shops near you. Bring them to a nearby park with the best fall foliage in town. Don’t forget a blanket and some pastries to eat while you sample. Hold your own pumpkin spice latte tasting together and see what shop’s drink you think is the best.

2. Check out a haunted house or haunted hayride.

This is a great idea for those who just started dating. When things get extra spooky, hold hands or put your arms around your significant other. There’s nothing better than holding onto each other during a frightening haunted house walk-through. Most are relatively inexpensive too.

3. Stay in bed all day and get your Netflix queue ready.

Make some warm pumpkin chocolate chip muffins (I personally love this mix from Trader Joe’s) and eat them in bed. Queue up a romantic movie and get snuggly. Don’t forget to plan this one for a particularly chilly day!

4. Use Halloween as an excuse to wear costumes in the bathroom.

Leave the dressing up as princesses and superheroes to the kids. Order some seriously sexy outfits for the bedroom—French maid, firefighter, you name it. Celebrate Halloween night by dressing up but keeping the tricks and treats confined to your bedroom only. The costumes don’t have to be expensive either. Amazon has sexy options and most are under $30.

5. Go camping for a weekend.

Dates that last the entire weekend are some of the most fun. Spend a weekend outside when the leaves are at their peak foliage. Camping is an affordable way to have some fun and there’s something just a little bit naughty about having a romp in the fresh air.

6. Visit a winery or brewery.

Head out to your closest winery or brewery on a gorgeous fall day. Most offer tastings or tours for affordable prices. Pack cheese, fruit and crackers for a picnic afterwards.

7. Go apple picking and bake a pie together.

Find out your nearest orchard and pay a visit for some apples. Once you’re home, bake a pie together. Make things just a little sexier with a little flour fight or perhaps licking some ingredients off each other’s fingers.

8. Celebrate Hygge by the fire.

Hygge, which is Danish for a cozy and comfortable mood of wellness and contentment, is a great concept to celebrate as fall ushers itself in. If you’re lucky enough to have a fireplace, get it going and curl up together for some serious snuggling time.

9. Shop your local farmer’s market.

Plan a cozy dinner date at home a la Harry and Meghan. Head to your local autumn farmer’s market and grab ingredients for dinner at home eat by candlelight.

10. Head to a local football game or tailgate.

Let’s face it—NFL games are super expensive. It’s sometimes more fun to tailgate during a game instead. If the NFL isn’t your favorite, visit your college alma mater or old high school for a game together.

11. Host a group date bonfire.

Find someone with a backyard and make sure you can burn. Roast marshmallows and make some s’mores or roast some hot dogs for an affordable and fun time wIth other couples.

12. Make a fort and watch a scary movie.

Channel your inner child and make a fort together like you did when you were young. Snuggle up together and turn on a scary movie. At the jump scares, hold on extra tight to your significant other.

13. Go on a scavenger hunt.

When the weather cools off, it’s fun to get out in your city or town. Look for a nearby scavenger hunt and sign up together. See if you two can win the whole thing.

14. Head to a mystery dinner theater.

A mystery dinner theater is a great way to usher in fall and Halloween season. Get dressed up and ready to have a spooky good time.

15. Carve pumpkins and have some apple cider.

Go to your nearest pumpkin patch and grab some pumpkins and apple cider. Spend the evening together and see who can carve the best pumpkin. Roast some pumpkin seeds after and feed them to each other as you admire your handiwork.

16. Go stargazing.

Borrow a friend’s pickup truck (or use your own if you have one) and head out to the country. Snuggle up together for a night under the stars.

17. Rake leaves and jump into the piles.

Rake the leaves in your yard and when you’re done, jump in the piles. Fall’s version of a snowball fight is a good, old-fashioned and flirty leaf fight.

Fall weather is the best for dating. We tell you why with this piece.

How I’ve Related to Different Love Actually Characters As I’ve Aged

November 23, 2018January 22, 2024 by Kate Oczypokin LOVE, RELATIONSHIPS

One of my favorite holiday movies for the past 15 years has had plenty of relatable characters

2003’s Love Actually is an ensemble romantic comedy that has been attempted to be duplicated many times but no other movie has quite lived up to its holiday perfection. Iconic characters like Laura Linney’s lovesick Sarah or shy schoolkid Sam to Mark, whose unrequited love for Juliet was heartbreaking were all memorable. Of course let’s not forget Natalie!

I’ve related to different Love Actually characters as I’ve aged. Here are just some of them.

Sam, age 18

Love Actually came out the Christmas after I turned 18. My newfound college friends from my floor in my dorm all got together and saw the movie at our neighborhood theater. We were delighted to be included in a video clip that the movie PR were filming for previews to get people to see the film.

While all that was fun, and I came out loving the movie, I was obsessed with Sam’s character at the time. The adorable blonde elementary aged child and I had a lot in common—he poured his heart into everything he did, most importantly his romantic interests. I truly felt for him and his love for Joanna.

I remember whispering to my roommate when Joanna was singing “All I Want for Christmas is You” and turns to Sam first. She then continues to point to just about everyone in the auditorium. Sam’s angry and shocked face that Joanna wasn’t serenading him was so me. I told my roommate, “Sam is so me!”

Throughout elementary school and high school I was always a friend for everyone but no one wanted to really be romantically involved. Looking back, I am glad that it all ended up being the way it was. That all being said, I still feel Sam’s pain because that was me growing up! I still wish I had the guts he did to (spoiler alert) kiss Joanna.

Natalie, age 23

Since I bought the Love Actually DVD it has been my tradition to watch it not only the weekend we set the clocks back (as a celebration of the holiday season to come) but multiple other times throughout the season. In my early 20s, I identified so much with Natalie. Sidenote: I’m still looking for a sweater and coat like she wore at the end of the movie!

Anyway, when she was starting out working for the Prime Minister and another female co-worker talked about her behind her back, I remember sighing heavily. That was me at one point when I was working full-time. Having to deal with female co-workers talking behind my back was something that weighed heavily on my self esteem at that age. I’ve since learned to put pettiness behind me.

Not to mention, at 23 I still had a sense of innocence where I still dreamed about what it would be like to be in love with a prime minister.

Mark, age 25

A few years later, I would tear up at the iconic scene where Mark declares his love for Juliet despite her being married to his best friend. While nothing like this has happened to me, I still felt for him. At one point when I was younger, I was in love with my two best friends (at two separate points in my life). While I am much happier with the way things ended up, at 25 I felt deeply affected by Mark and his unrequited love. To this day, I still admire his bravery for going to Juliet’s as a “carol singer” and declaring his love.

Sarah, age 27

As I got older and started dating more, I watched Love Actually and couldn’t help but laughing at the scene where Sarah invites Karl back to her apartment. The complete and utter giddiness of her character as she asks for a minute to freak out in private that a guy was there was so completely me.

Later, as we see them entering her bedroom she kisses and subsequently tosses her teddy bear underneath her bed. I’d be rich if I had a quarter for everyone who’s told me that is me over the years!

I felt like I could be friends with Laura Linney’s character, as I understood the painfully long process of getting to know a man then finally getting him on a date and then to your apartment.

Pageant teacher, age 33

This may be a random one but hear me out—I am a piano teacher and when I watch the movie again a few weeks ago, I identified with the harried teacher at the Christmas pageant in the snowflake sweater. When he introduces the children and says “for this, I am sorry” or something along those lines I couldn’t help but laugh.

You could tell the teacher loved his pupils and understood completely that kids are unpredictable—no matter how hard they may have practiced for the pageant, some of the children might fudge their parts.

I could imagine myself saying that to my own students’ parents at a recital, no matter how hard they practice something there’s always the possibility of something going wrong. However, I will love them unconditionally and am so proud of every one of them—even if Jingle Bells ends up sounding more like Jolly Old St. Nicholas!

Happy holidays, LoveTV readers!

Want to read more on relationships and the changing seasons? Check out this piece on moving on to a new season in love.

The History of the New Year’s Kiss

December 30, 2018January 22, 2024 by Kate Oczypokin LOVE, RELATIONSHIPS

Why do we feel the need to smooch someone on the last night of the year?

When I began to think about New Year’s Eve, I wondered about why it’s customary to kiss a special someone while Auld Lang Syne plays in the background.

Here is a brief history of the New Year’s Kiss, with some personal anecdotes thrown in.

The Beginning of the New Year’s Kiss

New Year’s kiss traditions began in ancient Rome. They would throw a party on New Year’s Eve for the Festival of Saturnalia. Kissing and lots of reckless behavior would ensue. Sound familiar to New Years past?

Speaking of Saturnalia, the festival is partly to blame for the kissing under the mistletoe tradition. People would kiss under the plant in ancient Greece as it was associated with fertility and in Rome, it represented peace.

Later, English and Germans would kiss the first person they met at midnight on New Year’s Eve. The story behind this is that the first person you came across in the new year sets the tone for that year. This thought scares my anxious mind! If you knew your New Year’s kiss back then, superstition was that your smooch would sustain your new romance and made you closer to your loved one.

Europeans have also held masquerade balls on New Year’s Eve. Back then, masks were symbols of evil spirits from the previous year and when they were removed and the person was kissed, it was a cleansing act.

If you’re single and often feel left out on December 31st, you could always head to Scotland. Their celebration, called Hogmanay, involves kissing everyone in the room. The effort is to have people meet each other and perhaps might make single people feel more involved.

My Thoughts on the Tradition

I must confess, I’ve never been that big of a fan of New Year’s Eve. I think there’s always such anticipation for something huge and it almost always ends in disappointment. I’ve found so much more love and coziness at home. In fact, I’ve spent every New Year’s Eve at home with my family.

The last few years, my boyfriend has joined us and there’s nothing more romantic to me than curling up by the fire with him and our bulldog Moe as we watch the ball drop in Times Square. We do have a quick New Year’s Eve peck (hey my parents are usually there too!). That laid-back type of New Year’s has become my favorite way to spend the evening. I feel very loved on those New Year’s Eves surrounded by family.

However, that being said, my dream is for one year (just one!) to attend a New Year’s party much like the two Harry and Sally attended in my favorite movie When Harry Met Sally.

Movies and New Year’s Eve Kisses

Speaking of When Harry Met Sally, the New Year’s Eve scene will always hold a special place in my heart. It was the scene an ex-boyfriend used back in college to tell me how he felt about me. It always made me keep some magic alive about New Year’s Eve—and to understand the romance of it all.

Then there’s Bridget Jones’s Diary. I have always had a soft spot for the big end scene with one of the most romantic New Year’s Eve kisses ever. When Bridget Jones runs out half naked to Mark Darcy to finally share a passionate kiss, it’s everything. I’d like to think any New Year’s cynics are changed when they watch this scene.

Movies and New Year’s Eve Kisses

New Year’s Eve 2018

If there’s one thing I learned about New Year’s Eve is that you don’t have to be with someone to feel love. I have spent approximately six December 31sts in a relationship and the other 27 single. When I was old enough to date and single, I loved spending the last night of each year with people I love. Kissing someone like your parent on the cheek can be just as meaningful as kissing a significant other. Sometimes a little reminder about how much you are loved, no matter who the person is all you need. Happy New Year, LoveTV!

Want to read more on relationships? Check out this piece about not letting your insecurities get the best of you.

Start the Year Off Adventurous: 15 Dates Out of Your Comfort Zone

January 8, 2019January 22, 2024 by Kate Oczypokin DATING ADVICE, RELATIONSHIPS

If your significant other and you are tired of the same old dates, the new year is a great time to give new things a try.

Does the thought of date night bore you lately?

Here are 15 dates to start the new year off on a bold note.

1. Skydiving

George H.W. Bush went skydiving well into his 80s, even doing a run for his 90th birthday. Going skydiving with your significant other is a great way to have a big adrenaline rush in your relationship. If you’re wondering where to take a dive, here are some options.

2. Taking a road trip with someone you just started dating

If you’re a This is Us fan, chances are you’ve seen this season’s episode where Jack and Rebecca drive across the country to Los Angeles. Rebecca even mentions to Jack how her mother disapproved of her taking a road trip with someone she just started seeing. It turns out, the trip ends up bringing the two closer together. Don’t be afraid to take that chance this new year.

3. Have sex somewhere daring

After a movie, have a quickie in your car. If you’re hiking, find a secluded corner in the woods and get down and dirty. The important thing is, be spontaneous with things and you’ll soon see a new year spark.

4. Get a tattoo

This one’s only if you’re really serious about it. Head to your nearest tattoo parlor and get his and hers tattoos (or if you’re feeling more individual, your own personal design).

5. Go to a Drive In

Yes, they do exist. Find a small town near you that still has a drive in and make it an adventure just getting there. Channel your inner high schooler and steam up the windows. That little bit of rebellion will bring some adventure to your new year.

6. Stay up until the sun rises

I know this isn’t too adventurous but there’s something magical about staying up all night and talking. To me, watching the sun rise with your significant other is one of the most adventurous things you can do.

7. Visit a city you always wanted to go to

Figure out a city you’ve always wanted to visit and plan a vacation there. Make a pact to go before the summer. Ideas for cities to visit include Chicago, Seattle, San Diego, San Antonio, New York, Philadelphia and more.

8. Plan your dream trip abroad—then do it

Sure, everyone dreams about traveling abroad. This year, plan your dream trip (I did it on a budget when I was 25). Vow to do it by New Year’s 2020. Don’t forget to document every step of the way.

9. Go on a ghost tour

If you scare easily, step out of your comfort zone and book a creepy ghost tour in your city. Chances are, you may live in a place with plenty of haunted history.

10. Try out trapeze lessons

Make like Carrie in Sex and the CIty and learn how to fly through the air gracefully (or in my case, not so gracefully!).

11. Take a hot air balloon ride

If you’re not a fan of heights, snuggle up to your significant other and bring a bottle of wine for a romantic afternoon. There’s nothing more romantic than seeing your hometown from the basket of a hot air balloon.

12. Go ziplining

This one could be a great way to take in spectacular views while having a unique date.

13. Go rock climbing

Many cities have opened indoor rock climbing businesses. Check some out in your area for some physical fun. Challenge each other to see who can get to the top first.

14. Stay out all night

If you’ve been feeling too “adult” lately, channel your inner 20-something and go clubbing all night. Finish off your time out with breakfast at your local diner. Don’t forget to Instagram the photos!

15. Try a new cuisine

Pick a type of food your significant other and you haven’t tried before. Getting out of your comfort zone can be a real eye-opener—not to mention, the type of food you try could become your new favorite!

Want to read more about getting out of your comfort zone? Check out this piece about creating holiday traditions.

Beat the Winter Blues: 15 Sexy Songs to Get You in the Mood

February 6, 2019January 22, 2024 by Kate Oczypokin Sex, SEX TIPS2 Comments

Let’s face it—winter can be long, dark, cold and sometimes downright depressing.

I’ve always thought the time after the holidays until the first day of spring is the darkest, most “blah” time of the year. Sometimes, you may not want to do anything but just curl up with the latest Netflix show to binge and call it a night. If your sex life seems to be lacking when it gets chilly outside, music can sometimes do the trick.

Here are 15 sexy songs to get you in the mood and beat those winter blues.

1. Maroon 5, “Secret”

Sample lyric: “I know I don’t know you, but I want you so bad.”

This song has been on my sexy playlist for as long as I can remember. You can’t beat Adam Levine at his most raw. Not to mention, the steady rhythm is perfect for a serious bump and grind session.

2. Aretha Franklin, “(You Make Me Feel Like) A Natural Woman”

Sample lyric: “Oh baby what you’ve done to me, you make me feel so good inside.”

I first discovered how sexy this song was when I saw The Big Chill when I was about 13 or 14. There’s nothing like Aretha’s soulful voice to get you in the mood. Play this during a candlelit dinner to get things started.

3. Taylor Swift, “Dress”

Sample lyric: “Only bought this dress so you could take it off.”

Don’t laugh at me for this one! Taylor has grown up. Long gone are the oversized glasses and t-shirts. Enter the era of sophisticated snake necklaces and lots of black leather. Taylor has been dating British actor Joe Alwyn for awhile now and it shows—this is one of her sexiest songs to date.

4. Christina Aguilera, Pink, Lil’ Kim & Mya, “Lady Marmalade”

Sample lyric: “She said, ‘Hello, hey Joe, you wanna give it a go?”

This super fun 2001 remake is a great bop to get ready for a sexy date. It’s fun to dance around in lingerie, to prep yourself for a fun and sexy date (confession: I’ve done this more times than I can count!).

5. Boyz II Men, “I’ll Make Love to You”

Sample lyric: “And I’ll hold you tight baby all through the night.”

Nothing like a classic Boyz II Men jam to get you feeling ready for some serious between the sheets action. The 1994 song was most likely your first makeout song or perhaps even what was playing during your first time.

6. Ginuwine, “Pony”

Sample lyric: “If you’re horny, let’s do it, ride it, my pony.”

The blush-worthy lyrics are just begging for a striptease from your significant other. Have your partner channel their inner Magic Mike and deliver a sizzling performance to get you feeling extra sexy.

7. Phil Collins, “In the Air Tonight”

Sample lyric: “And I’ve been waiting for this moment for all my life, oh Lord.”

The drum break in the middle of the song is just as orgasmic as the real thing. Play this one for a new flame when you just can’t wait to get it on.

8. Queen, “Fat Bottomed Girls”

Sample lyric: “Hey big woman, you made a bad boy out of me.”

For all my fellow curvy ladies, this one always bumps up my confidence a few notches and makes me feel ultra-sexy.

9. Usher, “You Make Me Wanna”

Sample lyric: “You make me wanna, leave the one I’m with, start a new relationship with you.”

I am by no means advocating cheating, but the late ‘90s smooth jam is extremely sensual. We’ve all had that friend we’ve wanted to be something more—if anything, this is a great one to listen to on your own, if you get my drift!

10. Etta James, “I Just Want to Make Love to You”
Sample lyric: “I don’t want you sad and blue, and I just wanna make love to you.”

You can’t beat a vintage Etta James tune, especially one of her finest. Save this one for Valentine’s Day, it’s just begging for a striptease.

11. Solomon Burke, “Cry to Me”
Sample lyric: “Well here I am, my honey, c’mon baby cry to me.”

Any Dirty Dancing fans will remember this song as the big (spoiler alert!) sex scene between Baby and Johnny. The movie’s producers picked it for a reason. It automatically makes you think of making love on a hot summer night.

12. The Righteous Brothers, “Unchained Melody”
Sample lyric: “Oh my love, my darling, I’ve hungered for your touch.”

The iconic Ghost scene made this song what it is today—the OG sexy song. It’s tender opening notes are perfect for a cozy night of lovemaking with your longtime partner.

13. Jeremih, “Birthday Sexy”
Sample lyric: “See you sexy in them jeans got me on ten.”

Jeremih celebrates the most special sex of all—the kind you get on your birthday.

14. Beyoncé, “Partition”
Sample lyric: “He bucked all my buttons, he ripped my blouse, he Monica Lewinskyed all on my gown.”

Everyone can relate to keeping private what goes on behind closed doors. Beyoncé just lets us in for a peek and it’s sexier than ever.

15. The 1975 “The Sex”
Sample lyric: “*But if we’re gonna do anything we might as well just f***”*

The 1975 talks about getting it on in the back of a van with this one. If anything, it will make you reminisce about trysts in the back of your parents borrowed car in high school.

Sex is better with some music. Beat the winter blues with these deliciously sultry tunes.

15 Ways to Throw an Epic Galentine’s Day

February 11, 2019January 22, 2024 by Kate Oczypokin DATING ADVICE, RELATIONSHIPS

The unofficial February 13th holiday Galentine’s Day has become a fun way to celebrate Valentine’s Day with your squad.

When I first saw the Parks and Recreation episode where Leslie Knope invites her girl squad out for a Galentine’s Day breakfast, I was intrigued by the idea. In the nearly decade old (!!) episode, Amy Poehler’s iconic character says, “Oh, it’s only the best day of the year. Every February 13th, my lady friends and I leave our husbands and our boyfriends at home, and we just come and kick it, breakfast-style. Ladies celebrating ladies. It’s like Lilith Fair, minus the angst. Plus frittatas.”

Here are 15 fun ways to throw an epic Galentine’s Day with your ladies.

1. Go axe throwing.

All the rage lately, axe throwing is a great way to unleash your inner badass. There are multiple locations around the country. While our moms threw darts in bars, we get to throw small axes into a dartboard. This one is especially fun to take newly single friends to.

2. Take a Pound class.

If you’re still wondering what class Chrissy Metz’s character Kate takes in This is Us, it’s called Pound. Using drumsticks, class members can rock out to music and sculpt their arms into Michelle Obama-worthy oblivion.

3. Attend a concert.

There’s nothing more fun and spontaneous than going to a live show. Websites like Jambase.com and Songkick.com are great ways to look up concerts in your area.

4. Throw an epic Grease-style slumber party.

Invite your friends over to sleep over like you did in junior high. Encourage them to bring fun Grease-style oversized Oxford shirts a la Rizzo or fun lingerie like Frenchie.

5. Channel Parks and Rec’s Tom and Donna and have a “treat yo self” day.

Ever since Parks and Recreation’s ultimate duo went on their “treat yo self” day, it’s been fun to celebrate with a day of excess. Grab your ladies and head to the mall for a day of shopping. Self-love is so important, so don’t be afraid to spend a bit of cash on yourself—you deserve it!

6. Host a potluck with foods you haven’t tried before.

Use Galentine’s Day to ask friends to bring over their favorite dish. Grab some wine and enjoy a night of catching up over new dishes.

7. Meet up at your favorite bar and play the Galentine’s Day Drinking Game.

It’s true—Buzzfeed created a drinking game involving the honorary holiday! Head to your favorite bar and bring a printout of the game to play while you’re sipping your favorite cocktails.

8. Go on an impromptu road trip.

I used to love taking a road trip to Virginia to a Taco Bell my friends and I loved in college. Even if it’s just a simple trip to get takeout, spend Galentine’s Day with your ladies on a spur-of-the-moment road trip.

9. Get fellow pet “moms” together for a photo shoot.

Organize an afternoon with your friends who are pet owners and use a camera to have a photo shoot with everyone’s furry friends.

10. Go old school with a crafting day.

Remember the days when you used to make friendship bracelets at recess? How about the handmade Valentines you used to create? Channel your inner elementary school kid and have a crafting day with your besties in honor of the day celebrating all things love.

11. Give back like Leslie Knope and volunteer.

Get your friends together for a day of volunteering. Pick up trash at your local park, work with kids or spend the day serving a meal at a homeless shelter. Whatever you do, make like Leslie Knope and be kind to others—spread love, it is Valentine’s Day after all!

12. Do a Secret Santa style gift exchange, Galentine’s style.

This time of year, stores like Target and Jo Ann Fabrics are teeming with adorable Valentine’s Day trinkets. Do a Secret Santa/Snowflake style gift exchange with your ladies and make it a small $10-$20 limit. Get ready to ooo and aww at cute mugs, necklaces, wall hangings and more.

13. Visit a nearby winery.

Celebrate Galentine’s Day this year at a local winery. If there aren’t any near you, plan a quick weekend getaway to one with your bffs.

14. Binge watch The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel.

Invite your girls to come over in their most comfortable sweats for a day of binge watching a show that celebrates women in a big way.

15. Head to a drag brunch.

Going to a drag brunch is something I’ve always wanted to do but never have had the chance to yet. Grab your group and head to your city’s nearest drag brunch for a seriously fun Galentine’s Day.

Throw an epic Galentine’s Day with these 15 fun ideas.

10 Everyday Places to Meet People

February 14, 2019January 22, 2024 by Kate Oczypokin DATING ADVICE, RELATIONSHIPS

When you’re single, it doesn’t have to be so hard to meet people.

At one point when I was single, I was always trying to figure out ways to meet people. I always wished I had ideas about easy, everyday places to meet. Often, I tried too hard at events that were meant to put people together romantically—speed dating, blind dates and more. I wanted a meet-cute like you saw in romantic comedies.

Here are 10 everyday places to meet people.

1. The grocery store

Next time you’re hurriedly rushing through the store, look up as you’re reaching for that piece of produce. You never know who may be grabbing an apple across the aisle who may be your future boyfriend or girlfriend. If you’re short, it’s fun to scope out a cute man or woman taller than you to coyly ask to grab an item on the top shelf.

2. A friend’s birthday party

I’ll be honest, sometimes in your 30s you are just too tired to be social on weekends. I know I find myself occasionally saying no to invitations just because I’d rather stay home and be cozy. Next time a friend invites you out to another friend’s birthday party go for it! You’ll never know who you’ll end up meeting.

3. At the gym

I know there’s always someone or something happening at the gym. When I was single, I never had the nerve to speak to anyone to commiserate about it! I often will text a friend about ridiculousness like a woman walking on the treadmill barefoot. Next time, joke around with the guy or girl at the wipes station.

4. At the dog park

If you always bring a book or are constantly looking at your phone while letting Fido run around, put down the phone. Wander over to that cute guy leaning against a tree laughing at his dog tumbling after a tennis ball. Bonding over pets is a great way to get to know someone.

5. Get to know your neighbors

How often do you smile and say a polite hello to your neighbors but never actually engage in conversation? One of my favorite things to do is get to know those who live on my floor. If you’re single, it’s a great way to get to know their friends and widen your social circle even more.

6. Host a party

One of my favorite things to do is entertain. My boyfriend and I love to tell people they are welcome to invite a guest. That way any friends who are single and looking have the opportunity to meet new people.

7. Work at your local coffeehouse

If you have a flexible job and can work remotely once or twice a week, head to your neighborhood coffeehouse for work. When I worked in an office, I used to leave my cube during some afternoons to work at the Starbucks down the block. While I did meet a lot of people, unfortunately no one resulted in a date. However, you never know who you may meet with your same taste in lattes that could turn into something more.

8. Eat dinner out alone

I get it, it can be super intimidating to go to a restaurant alone. I’ve done it a couple times in my life and it was one of the most freeing feelings I ever experienced. Striking up a conversation with your waiter or waitress or the person next to you at the bar could lead to deeper relationships.

9. Take a class

If you’ve ever wanted to learn a new skill, sign up for a class in your neighborhood. The year I turned 26, I vowed to learn some skills I always wanted to try—and finally get my driver’s license. I tried tennis, golf and driving lessons and quickly figured out I was terrible at all three. I did end up getting my license by 27 and meeting lots of new people in the process, so I still consider it a win-win situation.

10. Volunteer

If you’re passionate about a political candidate, get on their website and learn how to get involved. Meeting other like-minded people gives you a good chance of a successful relationship if things were to end up steamy later on, especially if your candidate wins their election.

Single and trying to meet someone new? Here are 10 everyday places to get inspired to make that connection.