Valentine's Day Archives - Page 2 of 2

What Does The Future Hold for Valentine’s Day?

February 7, 2018January 22, 2024 by Ola Faletiin DATING ADVICE, LOVE, RELATIONSHIPS

It’s February, and I know the drill: candy aisles filled with heart-shaped boxes, jewelry ads bombarding my web feeds with Valentine’s Day.

For what initially started as a brutal Roman holiday, Valentine’s Day has become a capitalist wet dream. According to Hallmark, over 151 million cards are sold annually. Which is funny to me, since I’ve bought Valentines (think the pack of 32 that come with stickers and candy sometimes) but never an actual card.

I’ve always been single for V-Day. I’m in good company; as of 2014, Gallup says that 60% of people ages 18-29 have never been married. Another survey says that 58% of millenials view V-Day as overrated.

With student loan debt through the roof, and plenty of millenials living paycheck to paycheck, lots of us don’t have the means to splurge on gifts. So, how will a holiday that thrives on compulsory gift giving and flower buying bode for a decidedly anti-capitalist generation? Well, I have some ideas. Picture this: it’s 2118 and Valentine’s Day means…

Including lovers of all varieties (not just romantic ones)

The Spice Girls said it best: “If you wanna be my lover, you gotta get with my friends.” Except in this case, lovers can take a backseat.

Over the past few years, self-care has become a buzzword, a movement, and a market all at once. So yes, self-love, but this also means not placing as much importance in romantic relationships, and whether or not you’re a part of one.

With phenomena like “Galentine’s Day” taking off, millenials are over this couples-only world. More adult are single folks. More women are growing comfortable in living perfectly stable, fulfilled lives without a romantic partner. I’ve always liked the idea of a Valentine’s Day that uplifts all the people we love, not just the ones we’re romantically intimate with.

In 2118, Marketers realize that unabashed singles are an untapped market. If you try to sell me something on a couple’s pretense, I’m not interested. But in the name of self-care? Take my money, why don’t you!

Advertisers Switch Up Their Tactics

Not too many people genuinely enjoy ads, but I prefer to avoid them altogether. I hit the “skip ad” button on YouTube so quickly. If that’s not an option, I mute them. The case is even more extreme for younger millennials; Generation Z is the most difficult audience to market to yet.

Not only are younger generations less tolerant of commercials, but also the most sexually varied generation. This is a problem when V-Day largely caters to straight couples.

We are the most queer generation ever. We also have an awareness of different intersections of identity (racial, ethnic, sexual) that’s unprecedented. It’s simply not realistic for all marketing toward us to be a white man and a white woman kissing. Evolve or die, as they say, and I imagine V-Day evolving.

Since Millennials value authenticity above else, I picture more folks getting their Valentine’s paraphernalia from places like Depop and Etsy, rather than big box stores. Or, V-Day cards in the Hallmark aisle with a bunch of different categories (women loving men, women loving women, men loving men, nonbinary, asexual). Instead of e-cards, think meme cards.

Overall, I imagine a more underground V-Day celebration. Which brings me to…

Renegade Holidays Will Pop Up

We’ve seen this happening with the reclaiming of Columbus Day as Indigenous People’s day. For we non-Christmas celebrating folk, there’s Festivus. As a generation that’s already combating gender and sexuality norms, and all other norms, it would make sense for many millennials to flat out reject V-Day with our own alternative holiday.

We already have that in Galentine’s Day. Some places are ahead of the curve: in Finland, February 14 is National Friendship Day.

In 2118, I forecast celebrations like “Asexual Awareness Day”, “International Vibrator Day” or “International Singles Day,” many of which, incidentally, already exist, taking over. Because commercialism is boring and the internet is a wildly imaginative place.

I’m no psychic, so I may be off target. What I do know is that the existing Valentine’s Day model (dates, heart-shaped chocolates, nice jewelry) isn’t very old at all. Millennials aren’t your mother’s generation. And getting a stale box of Russell Stover’s chocolates is something I can do for myself, thank you.

V-Day 2118 may still have the big box store vestiges of white, pink and red. But before long, the holiday will largely be in the hands of the independent retailers. No matter what V-day looks like in future, some things won’t change. There will always be folks who, like me, celebrate the holiday on their own accord by eating heart-shaped pizza and watching raunchy comedies.

Things to Do on Valentine’s Day If You’re Staying Inside Alone

February 7, 2018January 22, 2024 by Clementine Francesin DATING ADVICE, RELATIONSHIPS

Single on Valentine’s Day? It can be a challenging day for many people, but it absolutely doesn’t have to be!

Watching others with their stuffed animals, balloons, chocolates, and lovers can be soul crushing. Don’t let yourself go there, because, more than anything, you are worth loving.

So, here are some things you can do for yourself all day and away from the traditional hearts and flowers. After all, it’s actually not a bad idea! There are alternative things to do to show yourself how you’re loved.

1. Declutter

Have you been meaning clear up you’re living space? Do you have five of the same shoes in different colors? Do you need them all? Do you want them all? What about that shirt you had since 7^th grade? Sure, it fits, but you’re 30 now so maybe you don’t need it. Besides, it’ll give you an excuse to go buy yourself something new!

What better day to get rid of things you don’t need than on Valentine’s Day. To declutter is a great way to start fresh. You will feel immensely productive; it will probably take you the whole day, and if you’re feeling a bit of the blues you might even find it easier to throw things away.

Time to forget sentimental ties to things that don’t matter and move forward

2. Cook

If you’re like me you only eat processed foods that don’t require anything other than microwave.

On this Valentine’s Day try cooking a meal that takes several hours. It’s not Thanksgiving, but why not put a Turkey in the oven? Or prepare meals for everyday of the week. That way you won’t have to eat out, buy more food, or even go outside at all for 7 days!

Even better if you wanted to try veganism, but never had the time, prep a week of vegan meals for you for breakfast, lunch, snack, and dinner. No better time to really put your energy into making food you don’t normally eat.

3. Work out

Going to the gym can be a challenge. It takes drive. But, YouTube exists, so how about spending Valentine’s Day showing your body how much you love it by getting fit.

You can start the day with an hour of yoga. Then you continue with zumba. Then learn a few new dance routines. Beyonce’s “Formation?” Lady Gaga’s “Paparazzi?” Michael Jackson’s “Thriller?” How about all of the above?

Of course, consider showering and eating in between.

3. Write

Are you a writer who likes to avoid writing? Valentine’s Day is the perfect day to draft your half hour/hour pilot you’ve been dreaming up. Or your 2-hour length feature script. Maybe you’ve never ever written and you want to try writing. Reddit has a few ideas with an entire subreddit dedicated to writing prompts.

If you’re a booklover, go start your novel! Valentine’s Day is a great day to begin a new career path.

4. Sleep

If you are someone who doesn’t get enough sleep let Valentine’s Day be the day you actually relax. Stay in bed. Close your eyes. Meditate. Avoid social media. Avoid all screens. Avoid all human contact. Just spend the day drifting in and out of your dreams. You deserve some rest.

I stayed in bed for most of today and I would like to have done it longer, but I had to write this! Catch up on all your sleep. You’ll be ready to take on the day that follows!

5. Watch every single movie nominated for an Oscar that is out on DVD, streaming or blueray.

Are you one of those people who hates the Oscars because they don’t nominate movies that you’ve seen? Well, try watching those nominated movies!

Or, if you’re the type of person that always tries to watch all of them, but haven’t had the time, Valentine’s Day is 24 hours long. You’ll probably be up for 12 of those hours which are enough to at least watch up to 6 movies. Try watching a foreign film nominee while you’re at it.

6. Declare your love

This is the most radical idea on this list.

On Valentine’s Day, I am asking you, a single person, to tell the person you like that you like them. Not just so you’re not single, but so you can start a new path and a new adventure.

Maybe you’re single because you don’t tell people how you feel. Or you close yourself off. If there is someone you have had your eye on and they’re single too, go tell them!

You might get utterly rejected but you did it and lived your true authentic self! Then you can move on to decluttering, working out, cooking, and sleeping.

But, maybe the person you have feelings for is scared to tell you how they feel about you too. If you feel the same way about one another then you don’t have to spend Valentine’s Day alone and the holiday can end up being the start of something new.

Let us strive for more great days!

Want other ideas for Valentine’s Day singles? Check out How to Annoy People in Love on Valentine’s Day: Top 10 List and get ready for one heck of a hilarious adventure!

5 Ways to Discreetly Declare Your Love to Someone by Next Week

February 9, 2018January 22, 2024 by Clementine Francesin LOVE, RELATIONSHIPS

Sometimes, it can be challenging to confess your love to someone or tell them that you like them.

For me, it is always hard to tell people that you like them, so you fear you will die alone because you want people to be able to read your nonverbal cues, but what if you your nonverbal cues were actions?

Maybe you won’t hold a boombox over your head outside of their window, and maybe you don’t have your own Cyrano de Bergerac (but you’re also a Cyrano de Bergerac who doesn’t have a Christian) so the one you love won’t accidentally fall in love with you.

So, how can you discreetly tell the one you love that you love them without being too obvious? Here are some options:

Try getting a movie pass.

Tell them you haven’t used movie pass since it went down to $10/month even though you’ve had it since it came down to $10. Say to them the only way you’re going to watch a movie is if someone holds you accountable.

This will work if they are a fan of movies and are also behind on watching movies. Say, you need to watch all the Oscar Nominated movies that are still in theaters. Hard to do if you’re in small town, but you could always check out the DVDS via Netflix.

Since, you’re allowed to watch one movie a day using Netflix you can spend 28-31 days with this person and actually get to know them. And if they’re not interested in Oscar movies, you can always just rewatch Black Panther in 2D.

Pay attention to their interests.

If they say they like a book, a movie, a TV show, a band I recommend you read, watch, and listen to what they’re interested in. If you like someone it can give the two of you something to talk about if you’re also interested in what they have to say and what they think.

After you read, watch, listen you can ask them questions, offer your opinions, suggest things they can read, watch and listen to. Reciprocate, my friend.

Make a few affectionate mix tapes.

Mix tapes are not just spotify playlists, but if your crush has a CD player, you can send them a mix tape (mix CD). Of course, if you “pay attention,” you’ll learn if they are the type of person who wants mix tapes. Or, at the very least, tolerate them. Some songs I recommend:

Baby, I’m Dyin’ by Lolawolf
Don’t You Wanna Stay by Kelly Clarkson and Jason Aldean
Check On It by Beyoncé (featuring Bun B and Slim Thug)
Sex With Me by Rihanna
Moments by Tove Lo
Whatever You Like by T.I.
I’ve Got This Friend by The Civil Wars
Goodnight and Go by Imogen Heap
Yayo by Lana Del Rey
Starving by Hailee Steinfeld & Grey
Heaven Sent by Keyshia Cole

Mind you these may be not so discreet and quietly subversive, but should get the message across. But, please know who they are before you send them mix tapes

Make sure you know what’s happening on their blog.

So, your crush has a weekly blog where they talk about their life, or critique pop culture, or offer advice? Like their posts every week. Comment every week.

All bloggers love the attention that’s why the blog. It gives you great things to bring up in conversation. i.e. “I loved your blog last week about what Pluto being reclassified means to a generation and how it’s shaped your view of yourself and your ability to return to who you’ve always been, but bigger and better.”

This is almost like “pay attention” but is strictly about bloggers and blogging. Seriously, they write because they want you to engage in what they wrote, so engage.

Add them as your “plus one” to events.

Invite them as your plus one to every event you can invite a plus one. I have been invited to birthday parties, to shows, and game nights (none of which I have attended) but I was always allowed to bring a plus one.

If you keep showing up to these events with the same person soon enough people will ask you if you two are together. Of course, you’ll deny it, but the seeds are planted.

Honest to God, two of my friends who have been married for 8 years now got together because someone asked them if they were together. The thought “never” entered their mine, but once they thought about it, they asked if it was something they both wanted try and it worked out! It’s not just for rom coms!

This might seem like a lot to due by next week, but you’ve got some time and you can keep working at it after Valentine’s Day. You know that calendar you have? Start making a to do list. You don’t have a calendar? Go buy one and prepare!

Check out more interesting ideas for Valentine’s Day with your crush like: The Best Unconventional Date Movies For Your Valentine’s Day or start your relationship off right with these 10 Signs Of A Healthy Relationship According To Experts.

The Differing Valentine’s Day Plans from Seven Couples Around the U.S.

February 10, 2018January 22, 2024 by Kate Oczypokin DATING ADVICE, RELATIONSHIPS

Valentine’s Day is on a Wednesday this year. What are you doing for the big day?

Ah, Valentine’s Day. That simultaneously loved and hated holiday that marks the fact that winter will be finally be ending in just a few short weeks.

If you’re wondering how others will be spending the holiday commemorating all things romance, here are just a few ways your fellow women will be celebrating the big V-Day. I always loved Valentine’s Day because it was a day I got to tell my friends and family how much I loved them without them looking at me like I was crazy. Whether I was single or taken, I always managed to have a fun and loving day.

While my plans were never anything all that special, I wanted to know what fellow females were up to on this special day.

Here are some of the plans ladies are doing this Valentine’s Day. I bet you can relate to many of them!

“Our first valentines Rob and I decided we were going to embrace the holiday for all its cheesiness! We were long distance at that point so we wanted to go all out. I flew to Michigan and we made a decision to find the most ridiculous but cheap candy or toy we could find in the store and find the most over-the-top card.

“On top of that we decided to pick a restaurant we would never normally go to so went to hibachi. Every year since then we have kept the tradition and the cards keep getting better and cheesier. We also almost know the hibachi routines by heart. I have bought him everything from a furry heart with beef jerky, funny game controller and this year a candy fishing tackle box!” – Dillon, VA

“I don’t have any official Valentine’s Day plans on the books, but if I were a betting woman my money would be on getting wine drunk on my couch with some girlfriends while having a movie (and food) binge.” – Jessica, VA

“It’s a Wednesday so it is going to be spent stabbing each other at fencing club. Real romantic. Haha.” – Katelyn, MD

“Haha I’m working 2 p.m. ‘til midnight on Valentine’s Day this year so I’m afraid my answer isn’t very exciting.” – Liz, D.C.

“Every year he’s ‘surprised’ me with a gift exchange and then we do dinner and the comedy club. We love laughing for Valentine’s Day.” – Christie, PA

“I have grad school that night, so I’ll be in class until 8ish. Then, I’ll go home and review my lesson plan for the next day and probably go to bed. Maybe I’ll treat myself to a pink sweet and I may make Valentines for my students.” – Erin, D.C.

“I doubt we’ll do much. My grandpa used to send me flowers every year whether I was in a relationship or not. It was something that always made my day, made me smile, and made me feel so loved and appreciated. As I slowly watch him decline, I know he won’t remember to send me anything. It’ll be a hard day thinking about the one person in my life who always loved me no matter what and who never once failed me. I will, however, forget about the fact that he’s not supposed to have sugar and send him chocolate.” — Sarah, D.C.

No matter how you choose to spend Valentine’s Day, it’s important to remember to do what’s best for you.

It’s okay to be single, it’s okay to do something sappy and romantic too, and it’s okay to remember those you love. Have fun and celebrate love. After all, that’s what the day is all about!

Let us know in the comments section below what you’ll be doing on Valentine’s Day and what it means to you.

Want to show us what #LoveIs and win big? Check out the contest we’re holding here.

What to do When You Have to Work on Valentine’s Day

February 12, 2018January 22, 2024 by Rae Meghanin DATING ADVICE, RELATIONSHIPS

Sometimes life and responsibilities get in the way of love. For that, we’ve got some ideas for the working couple.

Since Valentine’s Day falls on a Wednesday this year, it may be hard to find time to spend with your significant other. If you work a typical nine to five job, you have a very limited amount of time in the morning and evening to do something to commemorate the holiday. Other types of shifts you may work, whether it’s retail, food service, or any other job with different hours, may make it even harder.

So how do you keep V-day special during a work day? Here are some ideas to maintain your holiday traditions.

Breakfast in bed

It might be a little cliche, but who doesn’t love waking up to the smell of pancakes in the morning? Wake up a little earlier than your S.O. on Valentine’s Day, and prepare their favorite breakfast. Give yourself time to eat together instead of rushing around like you would on any other morning. Make their special tea or coffee. Maybe get a vase put a little bouquet of flowers on the tray for a nice flourish. It’s a refreshing and lovely way to start your day.

Grab lunch at your favorite restaurant

The best dates involve food, and never fail to bring people together. If you work relatively close to each other, find your favorite restaurant in the area and meet up for a quick meal during your lunch break. It doesn’t have to be anything fancy, you are still in your work clothes after all. Treating yourself to your favorite food together keeps the day a special occasion, and makes for a nice breather from a busy work day.

Send some flowers to the office

Or wherever it is that you might work. Make your partner’s coworkers envious by sending them a special delivery of roses, chocolates, or even an edible arrangement. It’s a simple and sweet reminder that you’re thinking of them amidst the stress of the workplace. A small card proclaiming your love is a nice touch as well. It keeps the spirit of the holiday alive, even when you have to be apart.

Have a movie night

After a long, tiring day at work, it’s likely that you and your partner won’t even want to go out. So keep it at home, and spend the night watching your favorite movies. It doesn’t have to be a Nicholas Sparks movie or any other stereotypical romantic flicks, but could instead be a movie that has brought you together in the past (check out my article on my partner and I’s favorite unconventional date flicks). Order some take out, watch some Netflix, and chill out for the night.

Enjoy the long weekend

Valentine’s this year may fall on a weekday, but luckily it happens to also be the same week as President’s Day. If you have this day off, plan a long weekend for you and your partner to spend together. Whether that may be taking a trip to a romantic getaway, or just staying in and binge watching a new TV show, the extra time spent with your S.O. will make up for the fact that you might not have had a chance to spend much time on the actual day.

All in all, any time spent with your partner on Valentine’s Day is time well spent. Whether you’re with them all day, or for just an hour, there are a number of possible ways to keep the holiday fun. However you may define it, Valentine’s Day is ultimately about the reasons why you love your partner, and a celebration of what brought you together.

If you’re looking for more ways to show your love, check out Valentine’s Day Is Great, But Here Are My Favorite Ways to Show Love All Year Round and How To Show Love By Making a Difference This Valentine’s Day.

10 Valentine’s Day Activities That Won’t Require a Significant Other

February 13, 2018January 22, 2024 by Ola Faletiin DATING ADVICE, RELATIONSHIPS

Because mushy feelings are for everybody.

So, Valentine’s Day. A day of pink and red, and couples flaunting their couple-y ness…or so it may seem when you’re very, very single. I am very, very single and consider V-Day a great opportunity to be good to yourself, along with the other lovelies in your life because romantic couples don’t have a monopoly on love (obviously).

You have just as many options for activities as couples do on February 14.

1. Go to a sex shop

I said Valentine’s Day was a great day for self loving — what better to do so than treating yourself. Cash out on that vibrator you’ve been eyeing. Or buy your first one. Or just giggle at how many genital-shaped things there are.

Either way, I encourage making a purchase; chances are it’s on sale too, since you won’t be the only one looking to get sexy on that day.

2. Eat a heart-shaped pizza all by yourself

I did this last year and it was wonderful. Pizza is already wonderful, but heart-shaped pizza is super cute and Instagram worthy. Plus there’s something about eating heart-shaped pizza that just makes you feel good. I’ll probably do this every Valentine’s Day, to be honest. At least until I have someone to make dinner plans with, because I’m not sharing pizza.

3. Volunteer

If it’s hard for you to shake off some sad feelings about a solo Valentine’s Day, you can turn that sadness into productivity! As someone who works at a volunteer run organization, I know that February 14 is a day when people bail on shifts due to evening plans. Pick up for a shift at a shelter, or food bank. Only good can come out of putting more love into the world.

4. Book a trip for one

I am, and always will be, a strong advocate of solo travel. I love going places alone. I love doing things at my own pace, eating all the chocolate I want, and just generally using the time to recharge myself. All the more reason this is a great Valentine’s Day activity if you’ve got some cash burning a hole in your pocket! Consider a few places off the beaten path. Even a brief road trip a few towns over will do.

5. Treat yourself to a hotel room

If you can’t book tickets to get away, rent yourself a hotel room, pick up some bubbly, and take an extra-long, luxurious bath. If you’re feeling extra gutsy, go to the hotel bar and get some fun drinks. Who knows, you might meet someone cute. Either way, you’re having a grand, luxurious time. Happy Valentine’s Day to you!

6. Galentine’s Day

I think “Galentine’s Day” a really cheesy name, but I’m into the concept. I love my friends. One V-Day I made plans to drink champagne and eat strawberries with one, although she bailed on me…but trust and believe, it’s happening this year.

Dress up with your friends (they don’t all have to be “gals”) and make some good food together. Or order some. It’s a sure way to end the night with a heart bursting from love.

7. Make actual valentines

Remember in elementary school when everyone just made valentines for everyone and it was sweet with no romantic pretense? I miss those simpler times.

But I love paper crafts and generally sending my friends things in the mail, so channel all your love energy into some sweet cards. Load up on lots of paper, stickers, glitter and good markers. Or you could just go store bought. Nothing says I love you like a Hello Kitty card.

8. Decorate your space

People don’t decorate nearly enough. If birthdays, New Years’, and Christmas are occasions to deck out your home, I don’t see why Valentine’s Day shouldn’t be.

For the past couple weeks I’ve been eyeing the heart-shaped mirrors, heart banners, pink streamers, and pink lights at target. Half of them are in the dollar section, too. If you’re into decorating, turn your abode into a soft oasis of pink. Why? Because you can.

9. Watch some unromantic movies

My favorite holiday movies are always the unconventional ones (think Bad Santa, the Ice Harvest, Edward Scissorhands). If you’re really one of the “I hate V-Day” crowd, watch some really uncheesy, devoid-of-tenderness movies.

Forget When Harry Met Sally. Try Texas Chainsaw Massacre. Plus it’s Oscar season, so there are way too many movies worth seeing on the big screen. Pick one that’s not super sappy and enjoy being in a couple-free room. Even if it’s not couple free, it’s too dark to tell.

10. Ball out on dinner

Many restaurants run Valentine’s Day promos. Most are of the buy-one-get-one free variety, so bring a friend along or pocket the leftovers for yourself!

While I adore eating out alone, I realize that not everyone is so comfortable being out and so obviously single. Try to pick a place that isn’t particularly romantic. Or, better idea, clear off your dining table, light some candles, break out the good china, and order some gourmet eats.

This is only a list of 10, but the possibilities go much further! If you want, dream about sharing V-Day with someone next year. Or do what I’ll do, which is enjoy a whole heart pizza to myself. Because f*ck sharing.

Want some more ideas? Check out some Valentine’s Day activities you can do if you’re hiding inside all day for the holiday or even some ideas if you want to show your community some love on V-Day.

Puns, Regicide and Snowball Fights: One Couple’s Celebration of St. Valentine’s Day

February 14, 2018January 22, 2024 by ElisaShoenbergerin DATING ADVICE, LOVE, RELATIONSHIPS

Some couples have romantic dinners or go on exotic vacations for Valentine’s Day. We took a different route.

My husband and I find something decidedly unsexy to celebrate this day in February. Even from the very beginning, we’ve found creative ways to play with the concept of the day.

Nothing says I love you like Shakespearean regicide.

Our first Valentine’s day was spent seeing A Year in Magical Thinking by Joan Didion that was her true story of her attempt to deal with the death of her husband and daughter in the same year. Sexy, no? It still remains one of the best plays I’ve ever seen.

The following year, we made a point of seeing Shakespeare’s Richard II that deals with a man child whose bad decisions end up resulting in the loss of his throne and his life. Not one of Shakespeare’s better known romantic plays. And so on and so forth.

Two times, we’ve done crisis rooms as Valentine’s day adventures. The first was part of “The Last Defenders” where we had to dress in orange jumpsuits and work with 15 other people to try to prevent a nuclear holocaust. Sadly, we failed and everyone died.

Last year, we gathered a group of friends together in order to solve a crisis room, one of those new interactive puzzle rooms where you have an hour to solve a problem. We succeeded in escaping from a runaway train car through a combination of collective problem-solving and inspiration.

Another year we were teetotalers for the Chicago Poetry Bordello, waving signs against the forbidden drink and protesting outside the venue in a snowstorm. But that’s an entirely different story.

For me, Valentine’s Day was always a little silly.

I don’t mean that the holiday is silly in itself. I have yet to shake the initial meaning of the day as a child. In grammar school, I loved Valentine’s Day since it meant punny valentines and candy. Think “I Choo-Choo Choose You” valentine from The Simpsons.

It felt like a lesser Halloween but in the middle of the winter. Sometimes, I would even hand make the valentines because it was good to make things by hand.

Even later on in my life, I still found myself drawn to the joviality of the day. I felt disconnected from the romantic overtones, the marketing that said that you were less than fully in love unless you bought them XYZ.

Even in college, I remember buying ridiculous animal valentines with punderful sayings and giving them to my friend. I even sent one in an envelope to a friend in another state.

I learned in college that not everyone felt the same way.

Everyone had a ticket on the Anti-Valentine’s Day Train. It was everyone. It didn’t matter your gender or your relationship status. I heard nothing from my friends who I sent valentines to in other states. Talking to folks in college, Valentine’s Day was perceived as this Hallmark holiday, another mark of our over consumptive society. It was a holiday to make single people feel bad. If it was noted at all, it was with a groan. And maybe a shopping spree for discount candy on the 15th.

Even my then boyfriend was vehemently opposed to it. I asked him about it and his reply was “Shouldn’t you be treating your loved one well everyday?” I had no response to that. So we didn’t do much for the day.

In graduate school, I once asked a friend to dinner on Valentine’s Day. I remembered that it was the holiday since I bought her and her boyfriend silly Valentine’s day gift. It was two of those biting sticks with dinosaur heads. The ones where you had a head on a long stick and pressed a button to open and close the mouth.

Only after dinner, did it even occur to me that perhaps they wanted to have a romantic night. (She was delighted at the gift and clearly did not have strong Valentine’s Day opinions.)

Things changed delightfully when started dating my now husband

My now husband didn’t seem to have the same strong opinions about the day. And I still enjoyed the wackiness of it.

We treated most of these special events as a bit of a lark. Two weeks before our wedding, we had a joint bachelor party playing laser tag where we were on opposite teams. It made sense given the nature of our relationship. At karaoke, we sing classic love songs like “This is Halloween” or the Clash’s “London Calling” or on very special occasions “God Save the Queen” by the Sex Pistols.

Naturally, our Valentine’s day would continue our strangeness.

This year, as we begin planning for Valentine’s Day, we’re going in a slightly new but entirely appropriate direction. We are thinking more combative…like a snowball fight. But that depends on snow. Or perhaps laser tag like our joint Bachelor’s party.

Either way, we are going to celebrate Valentine’s day in our own way.

Looking for more adventures for Valentine’s Day? Check out The Best Unconventional Date Movies For Your Valentine’s Day or look for ways you can show your community love with How To Show Love By Making a Difference This Valentine’s Day.

How Valentine’s Day Has Completely Changed For Me Through the Years

February 14, 2018January 22, 2024 by Kate Oczypokin LOVE, RELATIONSHIPS

From grade school shoe boxes full of Valentines to red roses from my longtime boyfriend, Valentine’s Day has certainly evolved for me.

Valentine’s Day was always a day I enjoyed telling my closest friends and family how much I loved them. Over the years I’ve had plenty of stories to tell, but they’ve all gone back to one central theme—love.

Whether it was choosing the perfect themed Valentine’s to write out to my class, going to the yearly “date dance” in high school or celebrating a deeper kind of love with my longtime boyfriend, I made sure everything on Valentine’s Day revolved around love.

Here are how Valentine’s Day has changed in my life from my childhood through my teenage years.

Valentine’s Day during childhood is the most adorable time ever.

Remember those boxes of Valentines you could get at your local K-Mart, Wal-Mart, Target or CVS? They often revolved around what was popular among the youth zeitgeist of the time. I lived for those! I’m aging myself here, but Beauty and the Beast Valentines were an absolute must in second grade.

Later in junior high, Spice Girls Valentines were definitely something I begged my parents for. I remember sorting through the 30 or so Valentines in each pack and making sure my crush always got the one that was extra flirty (this never ended up working in my favor).

The worst classmate of mine always got the ugliest one and my best friend always got my favorite, of course.

In my family life, my parents always did something so simple that made me feel like I had so much worth. On Valentine’s Day morning, my brother and sisters and myself would each receive a heart-shaped box of candy. Just a little something to say I love you, I later have adopted this practice in my adult life. I am so grateful we grew up with parents like ours.

Valentine’s Day as a teen was like Galentine’s Day before it was a “thing.”

I didn’t date anyone until I was in college and went to an all-girls high school. Needless to say, Valentine’s Days during my teenage years were spent with friends.

Some of my favorite memories were spent on a riverboat where I grew up in Pittsburgh. My school had a yearly Valentine’s Day dance called “Date Dance.” The rules were ridiculous, that you absolutely had to bring a date so many of us awkward teens attending our all-female school had trouble finding dates (like yours truly!).

We all ended up just asking friends of friends to accompany us as our “dates” and we often abandoned the guys and danced the night away together. I still have a keychain of myself and seven of my closest girlfriends from a Valentine’s Day in the early 2000s. Chances are we had just finished dancing to some old school Britney, Backstreet Boys or N*SYNC.

The best Valentine’s Day come from the days I spent as a young adult.

My best Valentine’s Days from my young adulthood were all about self love. Every year I would head to this local restaurant just a few blocks from my apartment and get a slice of their mud pie.

This wasn’t just any mud pie, it was literally heaven on a plate. I’d always do something else too, like take a yoga class or take myself to see the Garry Marshall movie Valentine’s Day or He’s Just Not That Into You. Seeing He’s Just Not That Into You on Valentine’s Day by myself was so completely liberating.

I learned a lot about myself during those years. I learned to enjoy my own company and that spending a day about love solo really isn’t so lonely after all.

While I spent a lot of time on my own, I also started a very important tradition to me in my young adult years. When Nora Ephron’s “Julie and Julia” was released in 2009, I instantly fell in love with the film and the spirit of Julia Child.

From that year forward, I’ve made Julia Child’s boeuf bourguignon for a fancy dinner party with my closest friends. I love getting everyone together in honor of Valentine’s Day. This year will be our ninth in a row.

Today, things are different. Very different.

I’ve been dating my boyfriend for six years now. We have had plenty of Valentine’s Day memories that we laugh about and love to reminisce about too. There was a year where we were planning on going out to a fancy dinner, but a huge snow squall hit on Valentine’s evening.

We stayed in and watched Netflix with our dog and had the best time. Then there were three separate years I won the same restaurant’s Valentine’s Day contest. It got embarrassing by the third year and my boyfriend and I laughed how each consecutive year we would get just a little less prizes—eliminating roses, wine and free dessert.

They are still three of the best meals we’ve ever had with the best restaurant staff! My boyfriend always likes to buy me flowers or a sweet card or just a little something to make the day extra special too. Of course we always spoil our English bulldog Moe too. The memories we’ve made have created a deeper sort of love.

Throughout my life, I’ve always loved and appreciated Valentine’s Day. While its meaning has changed over the years, or I’ve focused more on a particular kind of love (friend love, familial love, self love, the love I have for my partner) the central theme has always been love.

I believe the world can always be a kinder place, so this Valentine’s Day, no matter what you choose to do, be kind and show some love. Chances are, someone may need it!

Valentine’s Day is great, but what about showing love all year ‘round? Check out this piece.

Original Date Ideas for a Valentine’s Day to Remember

February 1, 2019January 22, 2024 by Jillian Pretzelin LOVE, RELATIONSHIPS

7 date ideas to make this Valentine’s Day different

Valentine’s Day: that special time each year for couples to celebrate love and romance. It’s a beautiful day for sweethearts all across the country to show their appreciation for each other.

But there’s just one problem with the holiday: every year, we celebrate in the same way.

There’s always a nice dinner, maybe some flowers, a card with a bunch of pink hearts on it, and (hopefully) a big box of chocolates.

And don’t get me wrong, all of these things are great. Everyone loves going out for dinner. My whole week can be made with a bouquet of flowers and a few caramel-filled chocolates. And getting a card saying how special I am? Especially when it’s pink and covered in glitter? It’s the best.

But at a certain point, the holiday starts to feel a little forced, a little unoriginal, a bit… stressful. If you’ve been with your sweetie for a while, you might start to feel like you’re competing with yourself every February 14th. You try your best to top the year before but feel like you’ve run out of ideas.

If you’re new to a relationship, it’s often the same feeling, except instead of competing with yourself, you’re up against every Valentine’s day your partner has had before, and that can be just as stressful.

The problem is, we’re told what Valentine’s should be like and do our best to stick to what’s expected. For a holiday that is supposed to celebrate your relationship, a mass-produced expectation can seem pretty impersonal.

This year will be my 11th Valentine’s Day with my husband (and our first one as a married couple). I feel so lucky to have such an amazing Valentine’s date and I want our day to be special. That’s why we decided that from now on, we’re going to do things a little differently.

We sat down and made a list of extra special dates we’ve done (and loved), plus dates we’ve always wanted to do. We’ll use our list to plan for this coming Valentine’s and for many more in the future.

Below are seven of our favorite date ideas for Valentine’s (that aren’t the typical dinner date). Hopefully some of these ideas will help you and your honey break away from the expected like we did, and plan a Valentine’s to remember!

1. Take a walking ghost tour

There’s nothing more fun than acting as a tourist and learning about the little-know history of your own home town. That is—except for acting as a tourist and learning the little-known history about ghosts in your own home town.

A good ghost tour will guide you (and a small group) on a walking tour around local parks and neighborhoods. The tour guide will point out some old houses and historical sights, and of course, tell you about the local criminal history (and rumored paranormal activity) that occurred there.

I know you might be thinking that scary things should be a “no-no” on Valentine’s Day, but think of this date as a two-for-one. You and your honey will enjoy the romance of a evening stroll while also getting the benefits of an it’s-a-scary-movie-hold-me-close date as you listen to the spooky tales.

My husband and I did this once in the city we live in, once on vacation, and we can’t wait to do another one. We’re absolutely determined to find all the ghost tours in our county.

2. Second first date

While past Valentine’s Days may blend together, your first date probably stands out. Whether it was a super romantic evening, or if something embarrassing happened, you and your honey probably look back on it fondly.

This Valentine’s, try recreating your first date. You could go out to the same restaurant (or same type of restaurant) you went to that first time, and try to order the same thing. Whether it was a fancy sit down place or a Taco Bell doesn’t matter, in fact, you might find that the sillier the place, the better.

If your first date was seeing a movie, you could rent the film you saw together in theatres. If your first date was ice skating, you could slip those skates back on. You could even go through your closet to find the same outfit you wore that special night (bonus points if your first date was at a costume party).

Get creative. Re-create your memories in the truest (or funniest) way possible.

Then, sometime during the evening, talk about your first date and how far you’ve come since then. Even if you’ve only been dating for a few months, this is a great time to think back on your favorite milestones and best moments together.

As a momento, you might even write out a list of your favorite dates or memories together and save the list to look at next Valentine’s Day.

3. Laugh together at a comedy show

So many couples think that Valentine’s should be about serious romance: fancy clothes, expensive dinners, tall candles… but Valentine’s can be the perfect opportunity to simply share a laugh.

My husband and I love going to stand-up shows because they’re different every night and they always leave us laughing all the way home. We keep an eye out for when our favorite comedians come to town and we always have fun looking forward to our night out.

Look up the events calendar for your local comedy club and see what’s scheduled. Sometimes clubs even have special Valentine’s events or deals.

Just remember that if you haven’t seen a comedian before, give them a good YouTube check to make sure they match your, and your date’s, sense of humor.

4. Go glamping

While my husband loves camping, I love hot showers, so we don’t spend a lot of time in the great outdoors. However, a glamping trip can be the perfect Valentine’s date.

Look online to find some great local glamping sites or, if you have a backyard, make your own. You could rent a tent and fill it with blankets, pillows, a bottle of wine, and maybe even a cheese plate.

You can spend the evening snuggling and looking at the stars.

5. Take a fitness class

You might be thinking that exercise sounds more like a chore than a date, but I’ve learned that taking a fitness class can be a whole lot of fun, especially when you’re with your partner.

My husband and I love taking workout classes because it’s something healthy we can do together—and we always have a ton of fun doing it. This is no different on Valentine’s.

This Valentine’s, consider signing up for a fitness class you’ve never done before. You might consider goat yoga (or whatever crazy yoga variation you can find), paddleboarding, a ballroom dance class, trapeze class, or kickboxing.

All those endorphins (not to mention the boost of pheromones) are sure to make your Valentine’s extra fun.

6. Volunteer

Not many people think to volunteer on Valentine’s day, but it can be a great date for any couple. You can pick a cause that means a lot to both of you (maybe you both love animals or are really passionate about helping the elderly) and pick a charity together.

You could help walk dogs at the local animal shelter, help to plant trees, clean up trash at the beach, read to the sick or elderly, and so much more.

You’ll get to work together to do something meaningful, and not only will it make you feel good to help your community, but it will probably make you and your partner feel closer.

7. Plan a group excursion

When we think of Valentine’s, we always think of a romantic evening alone… the keyword being “alone.”

But there’s no rule saying it has to be just the two of you. In fact, you might have even more fun if you plan a double (or group) date.

You could put together a group bonfire night (complete with s’mores) or a bowling competition. You could invite your couple friends to go on a Valentine’s morning hike or head to the local zoo.

Think of it this way: your friends and family are a part of you too, and in some ways, a part of who you are as a couple. Celebrate together for an extra special holiday and a Valentine’s Day to remember.

No matter how you choose to celebrate, whether you borrow a few of these ideas, or have a few other ones up your sleeve, remember that the most important important thing is to show your partner how much you care, to celebrate your love, and (of course) have a ton of fun.

15 Ways to Throw an Epic Galentine’s Day

February 11, 2019January 22, 2024 by Kate Oczypokin DATING ADVICE, RELATIONSHIPS

The unofficial February 13th holiday Galentine’s Day has become a fun way to celebrate Valentine’s Day with your squad.

When I first saw the Parks and Recreation episode where Leslie Knope invites her girl squad out for a Galentine’s Day breakfast, I was intrigued by the idea. In the nearly decade old (!!) episode, Amy Poehler’s iconic character says, “Oh, it’s only the best day of the year. Every February 13th, my lady friends and I leave our husbands and our boyfriends at home, and we just come and kick it, breakfast-style. Ladies celebrating ladies. It’s like Lilith Fair, minus the angst. Plus frittatas.”

Here are 15 fun ways to throw an epic Galentine’s Day with your ladies.

1. Go axe throwing.

All the rage lately, axe throwing is a great way to unleash your inner badass. There are multiple locations around the country. While our moms threw darts in bars, we get to throw small axes into a dartboard. This one is especially fun to take newly single friends to.

2. Take a Pound class.

If you’re still wondering what class Chrissy Metz’s character Kate takes in This is Us, it’s called Pound. Using drumsticks, class members can rock out to music and sculpt their arms into Michelle Obama-worthy oblivion.

3. Attend a concert.

There’s nothing more fun and spontaneous than going to a live show. Websites like Jambase.com and Songkick.com are great ways to look up concerts in your area.

4. Throw an epic Grease-style slumber party.

Invite your friends over to sleep over like you did in junior high. Encourage them to bring fun Grease-style oversized Oxford shirts a la Rizzo or fun lingerie like Frenchie.

5. Channel Parks and Rec’s Tom and Donna and have a “treat yo self” day.

Ever since Parks and Recreation’s ultimate duo went on their “treat yo self” day, it’s been fun to celebrate with a day of excess. Grab your ladies and head to the mall for a day of shopping. Self-love is so important, so don’t be afraid to spend a bit of cash on yourself—you deserve it!

6. Host a potluck with foods you haven’t tried before.

Use Galentine’s Day to ask friends to bring over their favorite dish. Grab some wine and enjoy a night of catching up over new dishes.

7. Meet up at your favorite bar and play the Galentine’s Day Drinking Game.

It’s true—Buzzfeed created a drinking game involving the honorary holiday! Head to your favorite bar and bring a printout of the game to play while you’re sipping your favorite cocktails.

8. Go on an impromptu road trip.

I used to love taking a road trip to Virginia to a Taco Bell my friends and I loved in college. Even if it’s just a simple trip to get takeout, spend Galentine’s Day with your ladies on a spur-of-the-moment road trip.

9. Get fellow pet “moms” together for a photo shoot.

Organize an afternoon with your friends who are pet owners and use a camera to have a photo shoot with everyone’s furry friends.

10. Go old school with a crafting day.

Remember the days when you used to make friendship bracelets at recess? How about the handmade Valentines you used to create? Channel your inner elementary school kid and have a crafting day with your besties in honor of the day celebrating all things love.

11. Give back like Leslie Knope and volunteer.

Get your friends together for a day of volunteering. Pick up trash at your local park, work with kids or spend the day serving a meal at a homeless shelter. Whatever you do, make like Leslie Knope and be kind to others—spread love, it is Valentine’s Day after all!

12. Do a Secret Santa style gift exchange, Galentine’s style.

This time of year, stores like Target and Jo Ann Fabrics are teeming with adorable Valentine’s Day trinkets. Do a Secret Santa/Snowflake style gift exchange with your ladies and make it a small $10-$20 limit. Get ready to ooo and aww at cute mugs, necklaces, wall hangings and more.

13. Visit a nearby winery.

Celebrate Galentine’s Day this year at a local winery. If there aren’t any near you, plan a quick weekend getaway to one with your bffs.

14. Binge watch The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel.

Invite your girls to come over in their most comfortable sweats for a day of binge watching a show that celebrates women in a big way.

15. Head to a drag brunch.

Going to a drag brunch is something I’ve always wanted to do but never have had the chance to yet. Grab your group and head to your city’s nearest drag brunch for a seriously fun Galentine’s Day.

Throw an epic Galentine’s Day with these 15 fun ideas.