LOVE Archives - Page 23 of 36 - Love TV

Category: LOVE

6 Steps to Create a Breakthrough in Your Love Life

by Jo Millerin LOVE

I’ve been helping a dear client through the unraveling of her eleven-year marriage, which is giving me pause to reflect back on the gold of my illuminations surrounding relationship breakups. Six years ago, I was facing the disillusionment of my own marriage, and struggling with a “why me?” belief that life was happening to me. But as the fog of fear slowly began to lift, I caught a glimpse of a gift that would heal my heart and change the relationship I had with Love forever. There is nothing quite like adversity for discovering who we really are at our core. Whilst I had zero control over the behavior, actions and choices of others, I clung to the realization that I had full control over my own, and in that illuminating moment, I realized that life was actually happening for me. What follows is a self-compassion guide of what I learned when I chose Love over fear.

Acknowledge the hurt you feel is very real. There’s a certain brand of pain reserved specifically for the ending of a romantic relationship or marriage and it’s often a bitter tasting cocktail of disappointment, anger, resentment and just plain suckery. So often, we’ll do anything to avoid the taste, but these shadow emotions are just as important for us to feel as the brightness of joy, peace and love. They’re all essential parts of living the whole human experience. Glossing over this critical step not only sets you up for the likelihood of a rinse, repeat heartbreak, it denies you access to the illumination you’ll need for empowering different choices required by your future self.

Take a morning, a weekend or a “Get me outta here” reprieve to sit with the suckery and acknowledge the heft of the blow. Write, rant, cry it out. The pain needs to release. Setting it up and allowing it to do its job doesn’t have to feel like you’re rubbing salt on the wound, its simply a self-honoring act of kindness you can give to yourself.

Be Kind. It’s hard when everything hurts. Lashing out, talking trash, blaming, dissing, judging, and attacking may feel justified and downright entitled, but ultimately we’re adding suffering to the pain, and more pain will surely ensue. I’m a big fan of self -compassion; I like how it softens my edges and the edges of those around me. It sets the bar of what to expect of myself and offers an invitation for others to follow suit. If you have kids, be mindful of their own pain and the fact that they see and feel everything. Our words, and our behavior are the lessons we’re learning and teaching. Kindness takes crappiness to higher ground.

Pages: 1 2 3

5 Wedding Traditions That Need to Go

by MONROKin LOVE

This one needs to go right now. Guess which one?

It’s wedding season. The time of year where the most common question asked is “What’s your address?” Sifting through countless invitations, those in our mid twenties to mid thirties must decide which weddings we are going to go into debt for this year. Weddings can be a lot of fun, and are a great place to meet people, however here are 5 wedding traditions that need to go:

Speeches That Need to Go

“Hi, I’m Tiara, and I met Heidi when we were pledging Tri Delt — and here’s a completely irrelevant story that no one can relate to but us.”

NO ONE CARES

I am a firm believer that you should only get up to make a speech if you are a public speaker, host, or entertainer. Otherwise, you most likely have no idea how to give a speech. It is a skillset. Listening to 5 or 6 people in the field of anywhere from personal training to accounting prattle on about how they know the bride and groom is a total drag. Let’s keep it short. Make a toast, and let’s get on with it.

Bridesmaid Dresses That Need to Go

They are expensive. They are most likely hideous, and you never wear them again. Also, they are uniform. What if I have armpit fat and a tube top style dress doesn’t really work for my body type? Why are we putting those closest and dearest to us through this emotional turmoil? How about a color scheme? i.e. all my bridesmaids please wear a version of ____ color. Look how lovely that looks:

bridesmaids

Pages: 1 2

My Crush Method Protection

by Eliza Hurwitzin LOVE

I blame it on my grandparents.

I think I’ve always had an idealized image of love and relationships. Part of the blame goes to Hollywood, with romantic comedies being a staple of my childhood. But I place the rest of the blame on my grandparents. They were high school sweethearts and were still completely and totally in love with each other. They would go on walks together every morning. Run their daily errands together. Watch Jeopardy together. Their days were spent, side by side, and the mundane errands never seemed to be mundane to them. I assumed it was simply because being together was joy enough. One of my favorite things they had hung up on their fridge, next to the artwork from me and my brothers and sisters and cousins, was a “Love Is…” comic strip by Kim Casali that said “Love is Having Someone to Hug.” Just like their relationship, it was simple, sweet and perfect. It was exactly what I wanted.

I clung to this notion of the perfect relationship desperately and because of these firm convictions and my stubbornness, I didn’t date in high school or college. I rarely even considered it. Though I would develop crushes, they never panned out, because as soon as I found a flaw, I would end it. If I couldn’t imagine growing old with him, taking a morning stroll together, it was over before it began and I would wonder why I was still without love. I remember one guy in my photography class in college; he had long hair and I felt a connection with him immediately. He was nice and seemed smart; there really was nothing wrong with him! I sensed that he liked me, but when he asked me out I declined. I had somehow convinced myself that he was pretentious. Another guy I went on a couple of dates with was a little too short for my liking…The thing is, I’m 5’1 so why would I bother being so picky about a vertical challenge that I suffered from too?!

Other times I would develop crushes on guys who were clearly disinterested. One crush in particular was on and off for 3 years. This is just way too long, but you can’t help your emotions. I had no reason to develop a crush on this guy. We barely ever spoke. He was shy. I was shy. He was from my hometown and I would only see him when I returned home from college for the summer and holiday breaks. Because of our lack of communication, I was able to create this long, unspoken, but deep connection between us. I call this the crush method form of protection. For someone who wanted a relationship, but didn’t really want a relationship, the crush method was perfect and non-threatening. Without any actions, there could be no consequences. Looking back, however, I realize these crushes were just another way of protecting myself from a committed relationship. I was letting fear decide my fate. Why take a risk on a relationship, I thought, if it wasn’t going to last? My mom would tell me that I was too picky and had my standards set too high. Although part of me knew this was true, I was unwilling to let go of the idea of a perfect romance.

By the time I was in my mid-twenties, I still hadn’t had a serious relationship. I started to feel embarrassed and worried that love just wasn’t in the cards for me. I was on all the dating apps and sites, to no avail. I was ready to give up and resign to a life alone until I realized that maybe, just maybe, my mom was right. Perhaps I was being too picky. It was time to lower my unrealistic expectations. But if let go of my standards, would I also have to let go of my idyllic, romantic notion of love? I was willing to give it a shot, but had a feeling it would prove difficult. After all, this was a belief that I was practically born with.

Fortunately, I quickly realized that this wasn’t a notion I had to let go of. What I did have to let go of was taking dating so seriously. By doing so, I was setting unrealistic expectations that every date would/should end in a lasting relationship. It wasn’t until I started dating for the fun of it, rather than finding the absolute perfect person, that I was able to find love. I did have to date a couple of duds in the process, though. There was a guy who was a terrible listener. Another guy who seemed lazy and unmotivated, and didn’t seem to have goals or ambition. Not only did those duds helped me realize what I want and need out of a relationship, but they also showed me that no one is perfect, everyone has flaws, but despite that, there is something redeemable in us all. The bad listener was so funny and fun to go out with. He would tell me long stories about his past, his family, and his childhood that would never cease to make me laugh. But I grew tired of his inability to hear me when it was my turn to speak. This, in my opinion, was selfishness. I learned that listening is a trait I care most about. Though the lazy guy couldn’t tell me one future goal of his or even past accomplishment, he had a vast knowledge of music. He had some passion, though it didn’t translate to any action. Still, I learned a lot. Because I opened myself up to the dating world, I knew what I was looking for in another person, and I found him. A good listener. A kind person. Someone to make me laugh. A hard worker. No, he wouldn’t meet my unrealistic expectations set in my early teen years, which was basically a mixture of Prince Charming and Jake Gyllenhaal. He’s short. He’s funny. He’s incredibly messy! No he wasn’t perfect. But neither am I. Nor is our relationship joyous and happy all the time, as I imagined my grandparents to be, but it’s ours and because of that, it is perfect. Though the person you love may be different than you’d expected, your relationship should be exactly how you envision it.

Absolutely Beautiful Spilt Milk…the Hardest I’ve Ever Acted in a Relationship

by Lisa Lauretain LOVE

“I couldn’t believe it was you ‘cause it’s so unlike you!”

I guess that’s why they call it acting.

I’ve been performing since I could walk. Once I could talk, I was taking acting classes. I was always the goof and liked to do weird scenes where I could play an animal or a hunchback. My heroes were people like Jim Carey, the men of Monty Python, and by fifth grade, Conan O’Brien. Once I discovered that he had written for my favorite show of all times, The Simpsons, well, let’s just say the seemingly giant red headed goofball had my heart.

So when I was cast to be the expectant mother in a scene where Mr. O’Brien was to pour milk down the drain behind me, let’s just say I was elated. But I was also in for the biggest acting challenge of my life. From an attention whore of a performance artist to failed male comedians, I’ve played a lot of different roles in my life. But up until this point, I had never played someone quite so…”normal.”

Pages: 1 2

T&A In Bed With Lahna Turner, Comedian of The Perfect 10 podcast

by T A Talk Sexin LOVE

Lahna Turner, comedian, musician, and podcaster of The Perfect 10, opens up with our playful questions – thx for being so honest, Lahna!

t&a in bed with Lahna Turner

On our podcast with Lahna: EP 114! In homage to the fall and the change of season, we’re talking all about endings and new beginnings, with comedien Lahna Turner. ‘A’ shares her relationship revelations from a session with a psychic that changed her romantic life, then Lahna gets candid and raw about currently going through a divorce and we get the full story of how ‘Limeade’, her new comedic, visual album from the title parady of Beyonce’s ‘Lemonade’ came into being. Plus, a lively debate over how to handle the death of intimacy after children enter the picture with a real-life mom, and then we cap it off with ‘New Dick’, Lahna’s HILARIOUS new song from Limeade.
Listen here: http://www.blogtalkradio.com/tatalksex/podcast

That Tape! and My Triggered Flood of Shame Memories Starting At Age 6

by Amy Albertin LOVE

I felt the over bearing weight of shame that I did not deserve or provoke….Have you ever felt that?

Shame doesn’t really care who’s taking it on, even if it’s not deserved.

When I was asked to write about the Donald Trump media leak of him bragging about sexually assaulting women, I thought it wouldn’t’ be hard to conjure up some opinions on the subject. I am, after all, a woman who has a vagina that could possibly be up for grabs by him, so yes please, I’d like to tell you what I think. However, as I sat down to write about it, my thoughts became all jumbled and messy, and I would begin draft after draft only to erase the whole thing and start over. Why was I having so much trouble writing an objective piece on hearing a man who is running for President of the United States talk so openly about grabbing and kissing women?

I took a long time to sort out my thoughts, and when I finally did, what I discovered was an ocean of bad memories of my own sexual assaults, with the first being when I was six years old. I pushed these memories out of my mind, covered them up with other happier memories, like my wedding day and the birth of my daughter. But now, here they were. All dusty and dirty, occupying space in my mind. So now I guess I have to deal with these feelings. Fuck.

The first memory from when I was a little girl happened around my home by a kid I knew. He didn’t rape me, or molest me, but he did expose his penis to me and grabbed my hand to make me touch it. He was 13.

While I don’t remember many details of what lead up to that event, I do remember the feeling that came over me that I later recognized as shame. For the first time at six years old, I felt the over bearing weight of shame that I did not deserve or provoke. It was thrust upon me and in a span of no more than 10 seconds; this feeling became a part of me, and reared its ugly head a lot over the years.

I felt shame again when I was 10 and a brother of a kid in my school chased me and grabbed my chest really hard, then ran away laughing, and again when I was 19 and a guy in my group of friends pulled down my top to expose my breasts then jammed his hand down my pants, and again when I was in my 20’s and the manager of a fine dining restaurant I worked at for a few years harassed me, sexualized and bullied me so much I started to feel nauseous on the way to work.

When I sit down and define what the feeling of shame actually is for me, it’s a combination of fear that I will somehow be in trouble if I report it or don’t go along with it, that no one will believe me anyway, and that it will automatically be assumed that I did something to provoke this unwanted behavior.

Pages: 1 2

Two Years Later My Tinder Date Finally Paid Off!

by Lisa Lauretain LOVE

“I’m in finance.”

Oh, great, that’s a decent response to the ever common, “so, what do you do for work?” dating question. I was especially relieved at this response considering the fact that on my Tinder profile I specified, “no comics.” I had just broken up with a comic, the third of which I had dated, and I was, as they say, “over it.”

There’s a certain unmatched immaturity and weird competitiveness that comes from these special little beings, particularly when they’re paired up with a female comic such as myself. Now, don’t get me wrong, not all comics are assholes. But a great many of them are, and when they’re not, they’re often quite immature, or very sexist, or extremely egotistical, or unbearably cynical and insensitive, or terrible with their finances and in incredible amounts of debt, or just overall difficult to have any real conversations or sweet moments with. But again, they’re not all like that. Just the ones I’ve dated. And met. And heard about.

But it wasn’t just comics I was trying to avoid. I wanted someone far away from the entertainment industry as a whole, which can often be a challenge when dating in a place like Los Angeles, but here we were. Finance. Lucky me!

We were both really excited to meet, but I was working a day job in addition to an internship at a comedy theater in exchange for free classes. My schedule was slightly hectic and he and I lived a “far” distance from each other. (I was in the valley and he was in Hollywood, which in any other part of the country would be close, but in LA we might as well have been in different states) These circumstances meant that it would take awhile for us to set something up.

As time went by, he was seemingly more frustrated with the wait. His impatience was becoming quite clear, but he was cute and I was still serial dating at the time. We had sexted a couple of times and he seemed like he might be fun in that area of life. My policy at that point was to say yes to a date with anyone and everyone because at the very least I’d have a great story. So when someone got an attitude with me, I didn’t really care. I wasn’t looking for “Mr. or Ms. Right” at the time. I was looking for someone to have wild sex with, or at the very least give me something entertainingly bad to talk about later.

Eventually after a bit of whining and attitude, he told me he might be able to meet me during his lunch hour on a Monday. He worked from home but could pull himself away at around 1 if that was okay with me. Best part about it up until this point was the meeting place he chose: Target. There’s a Target in Hollywood with outdoor seating, in a sort of strip mall-type atmosphere. So that’s where we met. Not for lunch, just to meet. It was clear by this point that he wasn’t even intrigued enough to pay for a meal, or even go halfsies. Despite my policy of saying yes to everyone, I hadn’t had a super douchey date yet. Up until this point, that is.

I couldn’t really figure it out. He would sip on his green can of Monster energy drink while telling me things like, “you’d probably be a pretty good cam girl. You could make like…15 bucks an hour I bet.” He talked about his ex girlfriend a little more than most would consider to be polite on a first date. We also talked about my comedy a little bit. I told him I just received an email about the Last Comic Standing audition at the Hollywood Improv. I showed him the email because I was excited, and he said, “Oh, so, it’s probably like an open mic or something.” I explained that, no, this was an invite-only type of situation, to which he replied, “But probably a lot of people get invited, like thousands I’m sure, right? ‘Cause they have to have bad people to film at those things.”

I didn’t get it. Why was this guy being such a jerk, and why was he acting like every comic I’d ever dated? Was I wrong in thinking that the competitive asshole element would be removed if I dated someone outside of my chosen career path? Why was this guy starting to turn into the green monster that he drank before very my eyes?

I left the “date” feeling strange and almost defeated. What was it all for? I wasn’t even left with a good story. It was just…icky. I put it out of my brain for the most part but every now and then I would think about how odd it all was. About four months ago I deleted our message thread, which I had forgotten even existed, during a phone cleanse.

A few weeks ago I asked a neighbor if she had any good dog watchers/walkers that she could recommend. I was preparing for a trip and wanted to get a good person at a decent price so I was asking around. She texted me the contact numbers of three people and said they were all great. I went to contact the third one and realized…he was already in my phone! IT WAS HIM!!! The asshole “finance” guy was a dog walker?! No WAY!? I texted my neighbor to tell her and here’s how the conversation went:

Me: One of your dog walkers is a guy I went on a TERRIBLE tinder date with! I went to message him and he was already in my phone! Eep!

Neighbor: Wait whaaaaaaat!!! (Dog Walker’s Name)??? Lololol

Me: It’s funny too cause I saw him walking (Dog’s Name) once and was like, that looks like that (Dog Walker) guy, nah, no way, he said he was like a big shot finance guy. Can’t be (Dog Walker).

Neighbor: What?? Rly??? He is like an unemployed comedian.

Boom. And there you have it. The explanation. And a justification. It suddenly all made sense! The way he always came back with a snarky remark when I texted, “Tonight won’t work, I have a show.” The way he acted when I told him about my audition, and the way he acted in general. Everything finally added up! He was just another in a long line of asshole comics.

So the date wasn’t completely pointless. I guess I did get a pretty decent story out of it after all.

How My Relationship and My Self Esteem Benefit from Meditation

by Eliza Hurwitzin LOVE, Mind, Wellness

I started with just five minutes of a guided meditation in the morning…

A little over a year ago I was suffering from anxiety, low self-esteem, and I felt paralyzed by fear. I’m a natural-born worrier, but this was different. It felt irreparable. My emotions began to take a toll on my physical health, including severe stomach pain which caused me to go to the emergency room, where I was prescribed medication to treat my symptoms. seek medication for stomach pain. I blamed my stress on a lack of a steady job and inadequate income. My relationship with my boyfriend, which had been so solid, had turned rocky. I found myself fixating on things that I never had before. We live together and if he didn’t buy toilet paper, for example, you would’ve thought I caught him having an affair.

But it was only until I looked inward, that I truly began to understand the root of my problems. I was the one causing my inner stress and inner turmoil; therefore, it stood to reason that I also had the power to transform it. I decided to seek the help of a friend who had struggled with anxiety and she told me about meditation. Like many of you, I’ve heard the benefits of meditation touted spouted for years, but I was convinced that this practice just wasn’t for me. I’m just not patient enough to just sit. I’m restless. It’s simply a waste of time, I told myself thought to myself. I had my morning routine already, coffee, a shower, and out the door. I am a creature of habit, and though this routine wasn’t serving me well, I clung to it. Feeling as low as I did, however, was the catalyst I needed I was ready to change.

I started with just five minutes of a guided meditation in the morning, and though I didn’t feel immediately transformed, I did notice that I was able to take on the challenges of the day with ease and a lightheartedness that I hadn’t felt for a very long while. For example, when I missed the subway, that morning, for example instead of dwelling on the frustration of the later train’s crowded morning commute and how I might get in trouble at work, I let the anger roll off my shoulders . I noticed the mood shift within myself and continued to meditate every morning since then.

Before I started meditating, when I would come home to find a messy kitchen, I would react angrily before thinking. I would yell at my boyfriend, place all the blame on him, without even asking wondering how his day had been was. Through mindfulness meditation I’ve learned to be patient, compassionate and more understanding, which I came to realize is the foundation of any healthy relationship. Through meditation, I realized my expectations of what should happen were unrealistically high,held too high, so high that I was judging my boyfriend and other people, when I felt they had made a mistake or didn’t act accordingly. Though it has taken a long time, I am now able to see beyond my judgements in order to distinguish the reality behind a situation.

Letting go of negative thoughts and recognizing them for what they are, merely thoughts, I found I had stopped judging myself so harshly. My self-esteem was greatly improved, I felt confident in myself once again. I realized that my low self-confidence was a result of false beliefs about myself and my capabilities, I was judging myself just as harshly as I was my boyfriend. Meditation helped me see past these negative perceptions.

Meditating helps me to slow down and not get caught up in my anxiety. If I find myself feeling overly stressed throughout the day or following a worrying thought down all the possible negative outcomes, I take just 30 seconds to focus on my breath. Inhale, exhale, repeat, and then, I return to the present. I let my negative thoughts pass on by. I breathe in the present moment and exhale all expectations. Through meditating, I’m able to find the joy in every moment, because there really is so much to be grateful for.

The Love and Kisses That Are Motivating Sports

by zfortadminin LOVE

“If kissing us on the cheek before games gets us wins, then it works.” ~ Garrett Davis

ANNAPOLIS, Md. — When the University of Houston’s football players arrive for a game, they know what to expect as a prelude to the coming hours of brutality as they file into the stadium: a kiss on the cheek from their head coach, Tom Herman.

It is an unusual ritual in a sport that embodies America’s most rigid ideals of manhood.

“A kiss on the cheek is when he shows his love for us,” Houston safety Garrett Davis said, adding, “No one here is thinking, ‘Oh, I shouldn’t let him kiss me.’”

Physical expressions of affection certainly exist in big-time sports. Nothing says “Good job!” in baseball like a firm pat on the behind from a coach, and in international soccer it is not uncommon to see teammates peck each other on the cheek after a big play.

But kisses in football’s gladiatorial culture seem as incongruous as a Gatorade shower at the ballet.

For Herman, 41, there is no better way to demand the painful sacrifices of the game than to forthrightly convey his affection for his players.

“How do you motivate a human being to do things against his own nature?” Herman said in an interview. “There’s two things: love and fear. And to me, love wins every time.”

Davis said the players were taken aback early last season, Herman’s first as the head coach, when Herman planted a kiss on the strength coach Yancy McKnight during practice. Then he extended the ritual to all his players before their first game.

“I’m a bit confused as to why it’s garnered so much attention and why it’s seemed so odd,” Houston Coach Tom Herman, 41, said of his ritual of kissing and hugging players.

“I was not expecting it, but knowing him, I was not surprised at all,” tight end Tyler McCloskey said.

Alluding to that first game, a 52-24 victory over Tennessee Tech, Davis said, “If kissing us on the cheek before games gets us wins, then it works.”

Pages: 1 2 3

My Start Into Online Dating After Losing My Husband Too Soon

by Kelley Lynnin DATING ADVICE, LOVE

So let’s get right to it. For the first 3.5 years after my beautiful husband died, the very idea of dating or “someone else”, literally made me sick to my stomach. It made me feel physically ill, and I couldn’t even discuss it without having a slight panic attack. The idea of someone else talking to me, touching me, or being anywhere near me, made me want to vomit. That’s just the way it was, and I didn’t spend much time thinking about it. I was in way too much grief to even come around to THINKING about how freakin’ lonely I was.

Then, around the beginning of year 4, there was a slight shift inside me, for no reason whatsoever, or because it was finally time for that shift to happen, that went from feeling physically ill – to feeling sort of “okay” with the idea, but still not willing to actively pursue anyone. Then, about 10 months ago, someone appeared out of the blue. This person was not pursuing me, and I was not pursuing them. But they appeared in such a way and at such a time that it felt like it was meant to happen. This person was not only a fellow widow(er), but also knew my husband. We started talking, and over time, building a budding and wonderful friendship. We met in person in March, and our connection felt more real, because now I could touch it. I could look into this person’s face, and in it, I saw not only kindness and a beautiful soul, but also being around this person face to face gave me this overwhelming feeling of protection and safety – like Don had specifically chosen this man to protect me, because he could no longer do it himself. The details of why I feel this way don’t matter here, because I want to protect this person’s privacy, but the time we spent together over those few days was meaningful, beautiful, and the perfect mix of familiar and brand new, all in the same moment.

Pages: 1 2 3 4 5 6

Across the World, He Rode for Love

by zfortadminin LOVE

The story of Dr. Pradyumna Kumar Mahanandia and Charlotte Von Schedvin looks like every a Bollywood potboiler, except it’s real.

In this cruel world of instant makeout and instant breakups, this love story will reinstate hope in true and selfless love.

pradyuman
Image Credit: Satyanarayan Patri/Facebook

Pradyumna Kumar was born in a poor family in Orissa, which supported themselves by weaving clothes. Pradyumna did not let his poor financial condition come between his love for art and education. In 1971, he joined the College of Art in New Delhi and became a renowned artist who made stunning portraits.

His popularity reached Sweden, and a 19-year-old Swedish student decided to come to India to get a portrait done from him. While making her portrait, Pradyuman fell in love with the beautiful Charlotte Von Sledvin. Charlotte too, saw the goodness in the artist and fell in love with him instantly.

Pages: 1 2 3

You Fail in Relationships: Why?

by zfortadminin LOVE

Why are relationships so hard today? Why do we fail at love every time, despite trying so hard?

Why have humans suddenly become so inept at making relationships last? Have we forgotten how to love? Or worse, forgotten what love is?

We’re not prepared. We’re not prepared for the sacrifices, for the compromises, for the unconditional love. We’re not ready to invest all that it takes to make a relationship work. We want everything easy. We’re quitters. All it takes is a single hurdle to make us crumble to our feet. We don’t let our love grow, we let go before time.

It’s not love we’re looking for, only excitement and thrill in life. We want someone to watch movies and party with, not someone who understands us even in our deepest silences. We spend time together, we don’t make memories. We don’t want the boring life. We don’t want a partner for life, just someone who can make us feel alive right now, this very instant. When the excitement fades, we discover nobody ever prepared us for the mundane. We don’t believe in the beauty of predictability because we’re too blinded by the thrill of adventure.

We immerse ourselves in the inconsequentials of the city life, leaving no space for love. We don’t have time to love, we don’t have the patience to deal with relationships. We’re busy people chasing materialistic dreams and there’s no scope to love. Relationships are nothing more than convenience.

We look for instant gratification in everything we do – the things we post online, the careers we choose, and the people we fall in love with. We want the maturity in a relationship that comes with time, the emotional connect that develops over years, that sense of belonging when we barely even know the other person. Apparently, nothing’s worth our time and patience – not even love.

We’d rather spend an hour each with a hundred people than spending a day with one. We believe in having ‘options’. We’re ‘social’ people. We believe more in meeting people than getting to know them. We’re greedy. We want to have everything. We get into relationships at the slightest attraction and step out, the moment we find someone better. We don’t want to bring out the best in that one person. We want them to be perfect. We date a lot of people but rarely give any of them a real chance. We’re disappointed in everyone.

Technology has brought us closer, so close that it’s impossible to breathe. Our physical presence has been replaced by texts, voice messages, snapchats and video calls. We don’t feel the need to spend time together anymore. We have too much of each other already. There’s nothing left to talk about.

We’re a generation of ‘wanderers’ who wouldn’t stay at one place for too long. Everyone is commitment phobic. We believe we’re not meant for relationships. We don’t want to settle down. Even the thought of it is scary. We cannot imagine being with one person for the rest of our lives. We walk away. We despise permanence like it’s some social evil. We like to believe we’re ‘different’ than the rest. We like to believe we don’t conform to social norms.

We’re a generation that calls itself ‘sexually liberated’. We can tell sex apart from love, or so we think. We’re the hook-up-break-up generation. We have sex first and then decide if we want to love someone. Sex comes easy, loyalty doesn’t. Getting laid has become the new getting drunk. You do it not because you love the other person, but because you want to feel good. It’s all the temporary fulfillment we need. Sex outside relationships isn’t a taboo anymore. Relationships aren’t that simple anymore. There are open relationships, friends with benefits, casual flings, one-night stands, no strings attached – we’ve left very little exclusivity for love in our lives.

We’re the practical generation who runs by logic alone. We don’t know how to love madly anymore. We wouldn’t take a flight to a far-off land just to see someone we love. We’d break up because, long distance. We’re too sensible for love. Too sensible for our own good.

We’re a scared generation – scared to fall in love, scared to commit, scared to fall, scared to get hurt, scared to get our hearts broken. We don’t allow anyone in, nor do we step out and love anyone unconditionally. We lurk from behind walls we’ve created ourselves, looking for love and running away the moment we really find it. We suddenly ‘cannot handle it’. We don’t want to be vulnerable. We don’t want to bare our soul to anyone. We’re too guarded.

We don’t even value relationships anymore. We let go of the most wonderful people for ‘the other fishes in the sea.’ We don’t consider them sacred anymore.

There’s nothing we couldn’t conquer in this world, and yet, here we are ham-fisted at the game of love – the most basic of human instincts. Evolution, they call it.

Curated by Jeremy
Original Article

I’m No King Henry V111: For Better Or For Much Worse

by Eric Lampaertin LOVE

Imagine the mess he would’ve made if the King had Tinder?

Marriage is a beautiful union between two people who think they can stand being around each other for the rest of their lives. Many people get wed. Some do it twice it’s that good. Any more than that and you’re just being greedy. Granted, life expectancy during the 20th Century increased rapidly, so now it’s easy to cram a couple of marriages in there. But back in the Middle ages, you were lucky if you hit your 30th birthday. So it’s impressive that King Henry VIII had 6 wives in 55 years. His claim to fame is being a polyamorous screwhead that it coined this famous rhyme. “King Henry VIII, to six wives he was wedded. One died, one survived, two divorced, two beheaded.”

Catherine Of Aragon

The first victim was once divorced from Henry’s brother, Catherine Of Aragon. I mean, already this is off to a bad start. You don’t date your brother’s ex, even if he is dead. Have some respect. But the King doesn’t have any as he was having coitus all over the place, while poor Catherine had years of multiple miscarriages and stillborn births. You’d think the disrespect he displays to his wife would be a sign of what kind of man he is to the next wife, who happened to be one of the women he was having an affair with.

Pages: 1 2 3