Make Valentine’s Sizzle

IF YOU’VE JUST STARTED A NEW ROMANCE..

Body language of desire – Use body language wisely to signal desire to a new partner. Run your fingers up and down your cocktail straw or slowly circle the rim of your glass.

Or trace your fingertips leisurely from your neckline to decolletage – a green light to their subconscious that will give them confidence.

Pucker up – Tempt each other with sensational snogs. Kisses are pleasurable and produce the important bonding hormone oxytocin.

Try the “medieval necklet” kiss, planting kisses from behind their ear, down their neck, around to their other ear. This stimulates nerve endings along these sensitive erogenous zones.

Keep it simple – You may be nervous slipping between the sheets with a new partner but they feel the same too.

Siski Green, author of How to Blow his Mind in Bed (Piatkus, £.9.99), says: “Don’t worry about exotic techniques, turn off the phone and TV then turn up the thermostat.

“The warmth makes you want to get cosy.First stroke their erogenous zones, then lightly rub them, before using a circular motion.

“This makes exploring every inch of them exciting.”

Food of love – Having dinner at home means you can use ingredients that have an added aphrodisiac kick.

A simple stir-fry becomes a sexy dish if you use ginger, garlic and chilli. These seasonings increase your circulation and that in turn sparks your desire.

Spoon-feed each other dark chocolate dessert as it aids the release of feel-good chemicals like endorphins.

Show them the romance – Download or buy a CD of hits from the year they were born.

You may not have known them long but this romantic gesture shows you are happy they were born!

Thrill-seekers – Relationship coach Jo Hemmings at www.johemmings.co.uk, says: “If confident in this lust-filled stage, go Fifty Shades and enjoy a sexy role-play game using a blindfold and a feather.

“If you don’t have these to hand, use an airline mask, scarf or a stocking, plus a soft brush or anything faux fur.

“Take turns teasing, stroking and whispering to each other.”

Make a memory – Take a flask and some lovely light bites to the best outdoors spot in town and watch the stars come out.

Afterwards you can go for drinks, dinner or back to yours feeling all romantic.

Be playful – New couples need confidence to let go and being playful helps.

Sexologist Dr Trina Read, of VivaXO.com, says: “You should both write down three things you would like to try and slip these into your Valentine’s cards.

“This is a fantastic way to help your partner understand things you would like to try and visa versa.”

New couples can beat inflated Valentine’s restaurant prices by doing something fun and different like bowling or a game of pool.

Finish with candlelit drinks and snacks at yours. Research shows these are the standout memories couples love most.

Show Us What #LoveIs To Win A Love TV Membership!

We want to know what #LoveIs!

We’re so excited to announce that we’ve partnered with PicsArt for a Valentine’s Day photo editing challenge! You can now use the colorful and sparkling LOVE TV stickers to start spreading the love through the #LOVETVchallenge.

You start by taking a photo that shows us what love means to you. Declare your love for your sweetheart and show us what that looks like in a photograph.

But it doesn’t have to just be your girlfriend, boyfriend, partner or undeclared aspirational love. Do you love your pets? Love your mom or your sister? Tell us about loving your best friend. Show us what you do every day to express your love to those around you or to your community. Do you love the weather, the sunshine, or the beach? Do you love your favorite coffee shop, bar, or park bench?

Show us everything that you love and tell us why you love it and you just might win a free LOVE TV membership.

Submit your love images to the challenge in PicsArt and the top 10 edits (as chosen by LOVE TV) will be featured on their site and social channels. Share your submissions using #LOVETVchallenge #LoveIs and #PicsArt.

Visit our #LoveIs challenge page on Picsart to learn more and show us your love!

Also, be sure to check out the details and fine print below.

#loveis lovetv picsart contest

Details

  • Enter your love edits from 2/2-2/9.
  • Use your own photos or #FreeToEdit images on PicsArt to create an edit that fits the LOVE TV challenge theme.
  • Submissions are limited to three entries per user.
  • Voting for the challenge will take place 2/10-2/12.
  • Winners will be announced on Valentine’s Day, 2/14.

Fine Print

  • The Challenge closes at X PT on February 9th.
  • Winners must be 18+ to claim prize.
  • Winners will receive the following — 1st place- 1 Year Membership to LTV; 2nd place 6 Month Membership to LTV; 3rd place- 3 Month Membership to LTV; 7th-10th place -1 Month Memberships to LTV.
  • Winners acknowledge that in claiming their prize, they will be sharing their personal information with PicsArt and LOVE TV.
  • Winners will be contacted via email or direct message and will have 10 days to claim their prize.

How to be a Great Vegan Lover

Vegans are passionate people, which is a great quality between the sheets!

Committing to a vegan lifestyle, eschewing animal products in our lifestyles, applies to every aspect of our multifaceted lives, even the time we spend with our lovers between the sheets.

When I went vegan I was warned by some of those close to me that my love-interests might be put off by my cruelty-free lifestyle, but I stood proud in my vegan shoes.

Being vegan means I’m compassionate and considerate of others’ feelings, I have ambitions to make the world a better place, and I’ve been told that my skin has that mysterious vegan glow. To me, that all seems sexy. Would I want to be with someone who was turned off by those qualities? Of course not.

I’ve also heard from more than one lover of a vegan that we taste better than meat-eaters. Very sexy.

Valentine’s Day offers a wonderful opportunity to spread vegan love

We vegans are great lovers because of the passion and compassion we bring to the bedroom. There are also some tools we can take into our dating lives and to bed to supercharge the vegan love.

Being a fantastic vegan lover can mean sharing the delights of vegan food, and most dates appreciate the effort of a meal prepared by their love-interest.

For Valentine’s Day, why not seduce your love with a delectable vegan lasagna followed by sweet cruelty-free cookies and coconut milk ice cream for dessert? You can serve it all picnic-style on your living room floor, lounging on pillows and lit by soy candles.

vegan love lovers

For vegans, there are lots of fun ways to get sexy

When it comes time to slip on protection, it helps keep things hot to be fully prepared. When we avoid animal products, that means doing a little more research into our protection that looking at the brands on display at the drugstore.

Some condoms contain casein, a milk derivative, and others are made from lamb intestines. Not vegan.

With a little research ahead of time, sexy vegans will know to pack a brand like Sir Richard’s condoms when going on dates, which are vegan certified. Being prepared will keep you safe, keep you in the mood, and keep you vegan. Other brands offering vegan condoms include Glyde, L., and Durex (their non-latex options are vegan).

You can heat up Valentine’s Day with sexy cruelty-free lingerie

Though many of us like to cut to the chase, some of us prefer to slow things down, and Valentine’s Day is the perfect excuse to invest in some fun lingerie to enjoy as part of a romantic evening with a lover.

However, being vegan means avoiding animal products in our clothing, including silk, which is the result of insects losing their lives. In fact, every pound of silk comes at the cost of the lives of thousands of silkworms. So not sexy.

There might be an historic association between silk and sexy lingerie, but there are plenty of gorgeous cruelty-free options available for those who want to avoid the suffering caused by the fabric. We can be great vegan lovers by decorating ourselves in tantalizing pieces that are made without harm to animals.

My all-time favorite lingerie designer is Agent Provocateur and lucky for us vegans they offer plenty of beautiful silk-free pieces including garter belts and corsets, bodysuits and bras (like the gorgeous Daliah bra made out of 100% polyamide). Just remember to check the fabric content to be sure your piece of choice is cruelty-free.

The Brand Luva Huva also offers beautiful lingerie in fabrics other than silk. Their beautiful Cosette Bamboo Slip is slinky and sexy and completely cruelty-free.

Vegan lubricants may take sex to the next level

For many, lubricants take sex to the next level, with a magic touch. For others, they are necessary due to pain caused by medical conditions. Whatever the case, they are a wonderful addition to an intimate evening with your lover.

To be great vegan lovers, we can tote one of the assortment of cruelty-free lubricants available. The brand Sliquid boasts 60 vegan products for between the sheets, including Sizzle lubricant which cools on contact and warms with friction. A great way for vegans to heat things up in bed.

Also available from Sliquid are vegan flavored lubricants in cherry vanilla, strawberry pomegranate, and other tasty options. For the adventurous, these are a great way to invite creativity into the bedroom and have fun more fun with your lover while keeping things 100% vegan and cruelty-free.

Some myths might have you believe that vegans aren’t as sexually engaged as omnivores, but with a great deal of passion, delicious lingerie, and some fun tools in bed, those who avoid cruelty to animals make fantastic vegan lovers.

Check out Vegan: An Expert Guide to Plant-Based Dating by the same author.

What Does The Future Hold for Valentine’s Day?

It’s February, and I know the drill: candy aisles filled with heart-shaped boxes, jewelry ads bombarding my web feeds with Valentine’s Day.

For what initially started as a brutal Roman holiday, Valentine’s Day has become a capitalist wet dream. According to Hallmark, over 151 million cards are sold annually. Which is funny to me, since I’ve bought Valentines (think the pack of 32 that come with stickers and candy sometimes) but never an actual card.

I’ve always been single for V-Day. I’m in good company; as of 2014, Gallup says that 60% of people ages 18-29 have never been married. Another survey says that 58% of millenials view V-Day as overrated.

With student loan debt through the roof, and plenty of millenials living paycheck to paycheck, lots of us don’t have the means to splurge on gifts. So, how will a holiday that thrives on compulsory gift giving and flower buying bode for a decidedly anti-capitalist generation? Well, I have some ideas. Picture this: it’s 2118 and Valentine’s Day means…

Including lovers of all varieties (not just romantic ones)

valentine's day future millennials

The Spice Girls said it best: “If you wanna be my lover, you gotta get with my friends.” Except in this case, lovers can take a backseat.

Over the past few years, self-care has become a buzzword, a movement, and a market all at once. So yes, self-love, but this also means not placing as much importance in romantic relationships, and whether or not you’re a part of one.

With phenomena like “Galentine’s Day” taking off, millenials are over this couples-only world. More adult are single folks. More women are growing comfortable in living perfectly stable, fulfilled lives without a romantic partner. I’ve always liked the idea of a Valentine’s Day that uplifts all the people we love, not just the ones we’re romantically intimate with.

In 2118, Marketers realize that unabashed singles are an untapped market. If you try to sell me something on a couple’s pretense, I’m not interested. But in the name of self-care? Take my money, why don’t you!

Advertisers Switch Up Their Tactics

Not too many people genuinely enjoy ads, but I prefer to avoid them altogether. I hit the “skip ad” button on YouTube so quickly. If that’s not an option, I mute them. The case is even more extreme for younger millennials; Generation Z is the most difficult audience to market to yet.

Not only are younger generations less tolerant of commercials, but also the most sexually varied generation. This is a problem when V-Day largely caters to straight couples.

We are the most queer generation ever. We also have an awareness of different intersections of identity (racial, ethnic, sexual) that’s unprecedented. It’s simply not realistic for all marketing toward us to be a white man and a white woman kissing. Evolve or die, as they say, and I imagine V-Day evolving.

Since Millennials value authenticity above else, I  picture more folks getting their Valentine’s paraphernalia from places like Depop and Etsy, rather than big box stores. Or, V-Day cards in the Hallmark aisle with a bunch of different categories (women loving men, women loving women, men loving men, nonbinary, asexual). Instead of e-cards, think meme cards.

Overall,  I imagine a more underground V-Day celebration. Which brings me to…

Renegade Holidays Will Pop Up

future of Valentine's Day for millennials

We’ve seen this happening with the reclaiming of Columbus Day as Indigenous People’s day. For we non-Christmas celebrating folk, there’s Festivus. As a generation that’s already combating gender and sexuality norms, and all other norms,  it would make sense for many millennials to flat out reject V-Day with our own alternative holiday.

We already have that in Galentine’s Day. Some places are ahead of the curve: in Finland, February 14 is National Friendship Day.

In 2118, I forecast celebrations like “Asexual Awareness Day”, “International Vibrator Day” or “International Singles Day,” many of which, incidentally, already exist, taking over. Because commercialism is boring and the internet is a wildly imaginative place.

I’m no psychic, so I may be off target. What I do know is that the existing Valentine’s Day model (dates, heart-shaped chocolates, nice jewelry) isn’t very old at all. Millennials aren’t your mother’s generation. And getting a stale box of Russell Stover’s chocolates is something I can do for myself, thank you.

V-Day 2118 may still have the big box store vestiges of white, pink and red. But before long,  the holiday will largely be in the hands of the independent retailers. No matter what V-day looks like in future, some things won’t change. There will always be folks who, like me, celebrate the holiday on their own accord by eating heart-shaped pizza and watching raunchy comedies.

Read more of our Valentine’s Day coverage like: Valentine’s Day Is Great, But Here Are My Favorite Ways to Show Love All Year Round or The Best Unconventional Date Movies For Your Valentine’s Day.

Things to Do on Valentine’s Day If You’re Staying Inside Alone

Single on Valentine’s Day? It can be a challenging day for many people, but it absolutely doesn’t have to be!

Watching others with their stuffed animals, balloons, chocolates, and lovers can be soul crushing. Don’t let yourself go there, because, more than anything, you are worth loving.

So, here are some things you can do for yourself all day and away from the traditional hearts and flowers. After all, it’s actually not a bad idea! There are alternative things to do to show yourself how you’re loved.

1. Declutter

Have you been meaning clear up you’re living space? Do you have five of the same shoes in different colors? Do you need them all? Do you want them all? What about that shirt you had since 7th grade? Sure, it fits, but you’re 30 now so maybe you don’t need it. Besides, it’ll give you an excuse to go buy yourself something new!

What better day to get rid of things you don’t need than on Valentine’s Day. To declutter is a great way to start fresh. You will feel immensely productive; it will probably take you the whole day, and if you’re feeling a bit of the blues you might even find it easier to throw things away.

Time to forget sentimental ties to things that don’t matter and move forward

2. Cook

If you’re like me you only eat processed foods that don’t require anything other than microwave.

On this Valentine’s Day try cooking a meal that takes several hours. It’s not Thanksgiving, but why not put a Turkey in the oven? Or prepare meals for everyday of the week. That way you won’t have to eat out, buy more food, or even go outside at all for 7 days!

Even better if you wanted to try veganism, but never had the time, prep a week of vegan meals for you for breakfast, lunch, snack, and dinner. No better time to really put your energy into making food you don’t normally eat.

3. Work out

valentine's day alone workoutGoing to the gym can be a challenge. It takes drive. But, YouTube exists, so how about spending Valentine’s Day showing your body how much you love it by getting fit.

You can start the day with an hour of yoga. Then you continue with zumba. Then learn a few new dance routines. Beyonce’s “Formation?” Lady Gaga’s “Paparazzi?” Michael Jackson’s “Thriller?” How about all of the above?

Of course, consider showering and eating in between.

3. Write

Are you a writer who likes to avoid writing? Valentine’s Day is the perfect day to draft your half hour/hour pilot you’ve been dreaming up. Or your 2-hour length feature script. Maybe you’ve never ever written and you want to try writing. Reddit has a few ideas with an entire subreddit dedicated to writing prompts.

If you’re a booklover, go start your novel! Valentine’s Day is a great day to begin a new career path.

4. Sleep

valentine's day alone sleep

If you are someone who doesn’t get enough sleep let Valentine’s Day be the day you actually relax. Stay in bed. Close your eyes. Meditate. Avoid social media. Avoid all screens. Avoid all human contact. Just spend the day drifting in and out of your dreams. You deserve some rest.

I stayed in bed for most of today and I would like to have done it longer, but I had to write this! Catch up on all your sleep. You’ll be ready to take on the day that follows!

5. Watch every single movie nominated for an Oscar that is out on DVD, streaming or blueray. 

Are you one of those people who hates the Oscars because they don’t nominate movies that you’ve seen? Well, try watching those nominated movies!

Or, if you’re the type of person that always tries to watch all of them, but haven’t had the time, Valentine’s Day is 24 hours long. You’ll probably be up for 12 of those hours which are enough to at least watch up to 6 movies. Try watching a foreign film nominee while you’re at it.

6. Declare your love

This is the most radical idea on this list.

On Valentine’s Day, I am asking you, a single person, to tell the person you like that you like them. Not just so you’re not single, but so you can start a new path and a new adventure.

Maybe you’re single because you don’t tell people how you feel. Or you close yourself off. If there is someone you have had your eye on and they’re single too, go tell them!

You might get utterly rejected but you did it and lived your true authentic self! Then you can move on to decluttering, working out, cooking, and sleeping.

But, maybe the person you have feelings for is scared to tell you how they feel about you too. If you feel the same way about one another then you don’t have to spend Valentine’s Day alone and the holiday can end up being the start of something new.

Let us strive for more great days!

Want other ideas for Valentine’s Day singles? Check out How to Annoy People in Love on Valentine’s Day: Top 10 List and get ready for one heck of a hilarious adventure! 

The Differing Valentine’s Day Plans from Seven Couples Around the U.S.

Valentine’s Day is on a Wednesday this year. What are you doing for the big day?

Ah, Valentine’s Day. That simultaneously loved and hated holiday that marks the fact that winter will be finally be ending in just a few short weeks.

If you’re wondering how others will be spending the holiday commemorating all things romance, here are just a few ways your fellow women will be celebrating the big V-Day. I always loved Valentine’s Day because it was a day I got to tell my friends and family how much I loved them without them looking at me like I was crazy. Whether I was single or taken, I always managed to have a fun and loving day.

While my plans were never anything all that special, I wanted to know what fellow females were up to on this special day.

Here are some of the plans ladies are doing this Valentine’s Day. I bet you can relate to many of them!

“Our first valentines Rob and I decided we were going to embrace the holiday for all its cheesiness! We were long distance at that point so we wanted to go all out. I flew to Michigan and we made a decision to find the most ridiculous but cheap candy or toy we could find in the store and find the most over-the-top card.

“On top of that we decided to pick a restaurant we would never normally go to so went to hibachi. Every year since then we have kept the tradition and the cards keep getting better and cheesier. We also almost know the hibachi routines by heart. I have bought him everything from a furry heart with beef jerky, funny game controller and this year a candy fishing tackle box!” – Dillon, VA

“I don’t have any official Valentine’s Day plans on the books, but if I were a betting woman my money would be on getting wine drunk on my couch with some girlfriends while having a movie (and food) binge.” – Jessica, VA

“It’s a Wednesday so it is going to be spent stabbing each other at fencing club. Real romantic. Haha.” – Katelyn, MD

“Haha I’m working 2 p.m. ‘til midnight on Valentine’s Day this year so I’m afraid my answer isn’t very exciting.” – Liz, D.C.

“Every year he’s ‘surprised’ me with a gift exchange and then we do dinner and the comedy club. We love laughing for Valentine’s Day.” – Christie, PA

“I have grad school that night, so I’ll be in class until 8ish. Then, I’ll go home and review my lesson plan for the next day and probably go to bed. Maybe I’ll treat myself to a pink sweet and I may make Valentines for my students.” – Erin, D.C.

“I doubt we’ll do much. My grandpa used to send me flowers every year whether I was in a relationship or not. It was something that always made my day, made me smile, and made me feel so loved and appreciated. As I slowly watch him decline, I know he won’t remember to send me anything. It’ll be a hard day thinking about the one person in my life who always loved me no matter what and who never once failed me. I will, however, forget about the fact that he’s not supposed to have sugar and send him chocolate.” — Sarah, D.C.

No matter how you choose to spend Valentine’s Day, it’s important to remember to do what’s best for you.

Valentine's Day Puppy

It’s okay to be single, it’s okay to do something sappy and romantic too, and it’s okay to remember those you love. Have fun and celebrate love. After all, that’s what the day is all about!

Let us know in the comments section below what you’ll be doing on Valentine’s Day and what it means to you.

Want to show us what #LoveIs and win big? Check out the contest we’re holding here.

What to do When You Have to Work on Valentine’s Day

Sometimes life and responsibilities get in the way of love. For that, we’ve got some ideas for the working couple.

Since Valentine’s Day falls on a Wednesday this year, it may be hard to find time to spend with your significant other. If you work a typical nine to five job, you have a very limited amount of time in the morning and evening to do something to commemorate the holiday. Other types of shifts you may work, whether it’s retail, food service, or any other job with different hours, may make it even harder.

So how do you keep V-day special during a work day? Here are some ideas to maintain your holiday traditions.

Breakfast in bed

It might be a little cliche, but who doesn’t love waking up to the smell of pancakes in the morning? Wake up a little earlier than your S.O. on Valentine’s Day, and prepare their favorite breakfast. Give yourself time to eat together instead of rushing around like you would on any other morning. Make their special tea or coffee. Maybe get a vase put a little bouquet of flowers on the tray for a nice flourish. It’s a refreshing and lovely way to start your day.

Grab lunch at your favorite restaurant

romantic date

The best dates involve food, and never fail to bring people together. If you work relatively close to each other, find your favorite restaurant in the area and meet up for a quick meal during your lunch break. It doesn’t have to be anything fancy, you are still in your work clothes after all. Treating yourself to your favorite food together keeps the day a special occasion, and makes for a nice breather from a busy work day.

Send some flowers to the office

Or wherever it is that you might work. Make your partner’s coworkers envious by sending them a special delivery of roses, chocolates, or even an edible arrangement. It’s a simple and sweet reminder that you’re thinking of them amidst the stress of the workplace. A small card proclaiming your love is a nice touch as well. It keeps the spirit of the holiday alive, even when you have to be apart.

Have a movie night

fearful young couple watching scary scene in movie

After a long, tiring day at work, it’s likely that you and your partner won’t even want to go out. So keep it at home, and spend the night watching your favorite movies. It doesn’t have to be a Nicholas Sparks movie or any other stereotypical romantic flicks, but could instead be a movie that has brought you together in the past (check out my article on my partner and I’s favorite unconventional date flicks). Order some take out, watch some Netflix, and chill out for the night.

Enjoy the long weekend

Valentine’s this year may fall on a weekday, but luckily it happens to also be the same week as President’s Day. If you have this day off, plan a long weekend for you and your partner to spend together. Whether that may be taking a trip to a romantic getaway, or just staying in and binge watching a new TV show, the extra time spent with your S.O. will make up for the fact that you might not have had a chance to spend much time on the actual day.

All in all, any time spent with your partner on Valentine’s Day is time well spent. Whether you’re with them all day, or for just an hour, there are a number of possible ways to keep the holiday fun. However you may define it, Valentine’s Day is ultimately about the reasons why you love your partner, and a celebration of what brought you together.

If you’re looking for more ways to show your love, check out Valentine’s Day Is Great, But Here Are My Favorite Ways to Show Love All Year Round and How To Show Love By Making a Difference This Valentine’s Day.

10 Valentine’s Day Activities That Won’t Require a Significant Other

Because mushy feelings are for everybody.

So, Valentine’s Day. A day of pink and red, and couples flaunting their couple-y ness…or so it may seem when you’re very, very single. I am very, very single and consider V-Day a great opportunity to be good to yourself, along with the other lovelies in your life because romantic couples don’t have a monopoly on love (obviously).

You have just as many options for activities as  couples do on February 14.

1. Go to a sex shop

I said Valentine’s Day was a great day for self loving — what better to do so than treating yourself. Cash out on that vibrator you’ve been eyeing. Or buy your first one. Or just giggle at how many genital-shaped things there are.

Either way, I encourage making a purchase; chances are it’s on sale too, since you won’t be the only one looking to get sexy on that day.

2. Eat a heart-shaped pizza all by yourself

heart-shaped pizza for valentine's day

I did this last year and it was wonderful. Pizza is already wonderful, but heart-shaped pizza is super cute and Instagram worthy. Plus there’s something about eating heart-shaped pizza that just makes you feel good. I’ll probably do this every Valentine’s Day, to be honest. At least until I have someone to make dinner plans with, because I’m not sharing pizza.

3. Volunteer

child holding red heart in her hands

If it’s hard for you to shake off some sad feelings about a solo Valentine’s Day, you can turn that sadness into productivity! As someone who works at a volunteer run organization, I know that February 14 is a day when people bail on shifts due to evening plans. Pick up for a shift at a shelter, or food bank. Only good can come out of putting more love into the world.

4. Book a trip for one

I am, and always will be, a strong advocate of solo travel. I love going places alone. I love doing things at my own pace, eating all the chocolate I want, and just generally using the time to recharge myself. All the more reason this is a great Valentine’s Day activity if you’ve got some cash burning a hole in your pocket! Consider a few places off the beaten path. Even a brief road trip a few towns over will do.

5. Treat yourself to a hotel room

If you can’t book tickets to get away, rent yourself a hotel room, pick up some bubbly, and take an extra-long, luxurious bath. If you’re feeling extra gutsy, go to the hotel bar and get some fun drinks. Who knows, you might meet someone cute. Either way, you’re having a grand, luxurious time. Happy Valentine’s Day to you!

6. Galentine’s Day

I think “Galentine’s Day” a really cheesy name, but I’m into the concept. I love my friends. One V-Day I made plans to drink champagne and eat strawberries with one, although she bailed on me…but trust and believe, it’s happening this year.

Dress up with your friends (they don’t all have to be “gals”) and make some good food together. Or order some.  It’s a sure way to end the night with a heart bursting from love.

7. Make actual valentines

Remember in elementary school when everyone just made valentines for everyone and it was sweet with no romantic pretense? I miss those simpler times.

But I love paper crafts and generally sending my friends things in the mail, so channel all your love energy into some sweet cards. Load up on lots of paper, stickers, glitter and good markers. Or you could just go store bought. Nothing says I love you like a Hello Kitty card.

8. Decorate your space

People don’t decorate nearly enough. If birthdays, New Years’, and Christmas are occasions to deck out your home, I don’t see why Valentine’s Day shouldn’t be.

For the past couple weeks I’ve been eyeing the heart-shaped mirrors, heart banners, pink streamers, and pink lights at target. Half of them are in the dollar section, too. If you’re into decorating, turn your abode into a soft oasis of pink. Why? Because you can.

9. Watch some unromantic movies

Shot of young woman sitting in multiplex movie theater watching movie and laughing.

My favorite holiday movies are always the unconventional ones (think Bad Santa, the Ice Harvest, Edward Scissorhands). If you’re really one of the “I hate V-Day” crowd, watch some really uncheesy, devoid-of-tenderness movies.

Forget When Harry Met Sally. Try Texas Chainsaw Massacre. Plus it’s Oscar season, so there are way too many movies worth seeing on the big screen. Pick one that’s not super sappy and enjoy being in a couple-free room. Even if it’s not couple free, it’s too dark to tell.

10. Ball out on dinner

Many restaurants run Valentine’s Day promos. Most are of the buy-one-get-one free variety, so bring a friend along or pocket the leftovers for yourself!

While I adore eating out alone, I realize that not everyone is so comfortable being out and so obviously single. Try to pick a place that isn’t particularly romantic. Or, better idea, clear off your dining table, light some candles, break out the good china, and order some gourmet eats.

This is only a list of 10, but the possibilities go much further! If you want, dream about sharing V-Day with someone next year. Or do what I’ll do, which is enjoy a whole heart pizza to myself. Because f*ck sharing.

 

Want some more ideas? Check out some Valentine’s Day activities you can do if you’re hiding inside all day for the holiday or even some ideas if you want to show your community some love on V-Day.

Puns, Regicide and Snowball Fights: One Couple’s Celebration of St. Valentine’s Day

Some couples have romantic dinners or go on exotic vacations for Valentine’s Day. We took a different route.

My husband and I find something decidedly unsexy to celebrate this day in February. Even from the very beginning, we’ve found creative ways to play with the concept of the day.

Nothing says I love you like Shakespearean regicide.

Shakespeare's for valentine's day

Our first Valentine’s day was spent seeing A Year in Magical Thinking by Joan Didion that was her true story of her attempt to deal with the death of her husband and daughter in the same year. Sexy, no? It still remains one of the best plays I’ve ever seen.

The following year, we made a point of seeing Shakespeare’s Richard II that deals with a man child whose bad decisions end up resulting in the loss of his throne and his life. Not one of Shakespeare’s better known romantic plays. And so on and so forth.

Two times, we’ve done crisis rooms as Valentine’s day adventures. The first was part of “The Last Defenders” where we had to dress in orange jumpsuits and work with 15 other people to try to prevent a nuclear holocaust. Sadly, we failed and everyone died.

Last year, we gathered a group of friends together in order to solve a crisis room, one of those new interactive puzzle rooms where you have an hour to solve a problem. We succeeded in escaping from a runaway train car through a combination of collective problem-solving and inspiration.

Another year we were teetotalers for the Chicago Poetry Bordello, waving signs against the forbidden drink and protesting outside the venue in a snowstorm. But that’s an entirely different story.

For me, Valentine’s Day was always a little silly.

valentine's day children

I don’t mean that the holiday is silly in itself. I have yet to shake the initial meaning of the day as a child. In grammar school, I loved Valentine’s Day since it meant punny valentines and candy. Think “I Choo-Choo Choose You” valentine from The Simpsons.

 It felt like a lesser Halloween but in the middle of the winter. Sometimes, I would even hand make the valentines because it was good to make things by hand.

Even later on in my life, I still found myself drawn to the joviality of the day. I felt disconnected from the romantic overtones, the marketing that said that you were less than fully in love unless you bought them XYZ.

Even in college, I remember buying ridiculous animal valentines with punderful sayings and giving them to my friend. I even sent one in an envelope to a friend in another state.

I learned in college that not everyone felt the same way.

Everyone had a ticket on the Anti-Valentine’s Day Train. It was everyone. It didn’t matter your gender or your relationship status. I heard nothing from my friends who I sent valentines to in other states. Talking to folks in college, Valentine’s Day was perceived as this Hallmark holiday, another mark of our over consumptive society. It was a holiday to make single people feel bad.  If it was noted at all, it was with a groan. And maybe a shopping spree for discount candy on the 15th.

Even my then boyfriend was vehemently opposed to it. I asked him about it and his reply was “Shouldn’t you be treating your loved one well everyday?” I had no response to that. So we didn’t do much for the day.

In graduate school, I once asked a friend to dinner on Valentine’s Day. I remembered that it was the holiday since I bought her and her boyfriend silly Valentine’s day gift. It was two of those biting sticks with dinosaur heads. The ones where you had a head on a long stick and pressed a button to open and close the mouth.

Only after dinner, did it even occur to me that perhaps they wanted to have a romantic night. (She was delighted at the gift and clearly did not have strong Valentine’s Day opinions.)

Things changed delightfully when started dating my now husband

valentine's day ride

My now husband didn’t seem to have the same strong opinions about the day. And I still enjoyed the wackiness of it.

We treated most of these special events as a bit of a lark. Two weeks before our wedding, we had a joint bachelor party playing laser tag where we were on opposite teams. It made sense given the nature of our relationship. At karaoke, we sing classic love songs like “This is Halloween” or the Clash’s “London Calling” or on very special occasions “God Save the Queen” by the Sex Pistols.

Naturally, our Valentine’s day would continue our strangeness.

This year, as we begin planning for Valentine’s Day, we’re going in a slightly new but entirely appropriate direction. We are thinking more combative…like a snowball fight. But that depends on snow. Or perhaps laser tag like our joint Bachelor’s party.

Either way, we are going to celebrate Valentine’s day in our own way.

Looking for more adventures for Valentine’s Day? Check out The Best Unconventional Date Movies For Your Valentine’s Day or look for ways you can show your community love with How To Show Love By Making a Difference This Valentine’s Day.

How Valentine’s Day Has Completely Changed For Me Through the Years

From grade school shoe boxes full of Valentines to red roses from my longtime boyfriend, Valentine’s Day has certainly evolved for me.

Valentine’s Day was always a day I enjoyed telling my closest friends and family how much I loved them. Over the years I’ve had plenty of stories to tell, but they’ve all gone back to one central theme—love.

Whether it was choosing the perfect themed Valentine’s to write out to my class, going to the yearly “date dance” in high school or celebrating a deeper kind of love with my longtime boyfriend, I made sure everything on Valentine’s Day revolved around love.

Here are how Valentine’s Day has changed in my life from my childhood through my teenage years.

Valentine’s Day during childhood is the most adorable time ever.

valentine's day children

Remember those boxes of Valentines you could get at your local K-Mart, Wal-Mart, Target or CVS? They often revolved around what was popular among the youth zeitgeist of the time. I lived for those! I’m aging myself here, but Beauty and the Beast Valentines were an absolute must in second grade.

Later in junior high, Spice Girls Valentines were definitely something I begged my parents for. I remember sorting through the 30 or so Valentines in each pack and making sure my crush always got the one that was extra flirty (this never ended up working in my favor).

The worst classmate of mine always got the ugliest one and my best friend always got my favorite, of course.

In my family life, my parents always did something so simple that made me feel like I had so much worth. On Valentine’s Day morning, my brother and sisters and myself would each receive a heart-shaped box of candy. Just a little something to say I love you, I later have adopted this practice in my adult life. I am so grateful we grew up with parents like ours.

Valentine’s Day as a teen was like Galentine’s Day before it was a “thing.”

teen girls having fun

I didn’t date anyone until I was in college and went to an all-girls high school. Needless to say, Valentine’s Days during my teenage years were spent with friends.

Some of my favorite memories were spent on a riverboat where I grew up in Pittsburgh. My school had a yearly Valentine’s Day dance called “Date Dance.” The rules were ridiculous, that you absolutely had to bring a date so many of us awkward teens attending our all-female school had trouble finding dates (like yours truly!).

We all ended up just asking friends of friends to accompany us as our “dates” and we often abandoned the guys and danced the night away together. I still have a keychain of myself and seven of my closest girlfriends from a Valentine’s Day in the early 2000s. Chances are we had just finished dancing to some old school Britney, Backstreet Boys or N*SYNC.

The best Valentine’s Day come from the days I spent as a young adult.

My best Valentine’s Days from my young adulthood were all about self love. Every year I would head to this local restaurant just a few blocks from my apartment and get a slice of their mud pie.

This wasn’t just any mud pie, it was literally heaven on a plate. I’d always do something else too, like take a yoga class or take myself to see the Garry Marshall movie Valentine’s Day or He’s Just Not That Into You. Seeing He’s Just Not That Into You on Valentine’s Day by myself was so completely liberating.

I learned a lot about myself during those years. I learned to enjoy my own company and that spending a day about love solo really isn’t so lonely after all.

While I spent a lot of time on my own, I also started a very important tradition to me in my young adult years. When Nora Ephron’s “Julie and Julia” was released in 2009, I instantly fell in love with the film and the spirit of Julia Child.

From that year forward, I’ve made Julia Child’s boeuf bourguignon for a fancy dinner party with my closest friends. I love getting everyone together in honor of Valentine’s Day. This year will be our ninth in a row.

Today, things are different. Very different.

adorable couple on valentine's day

I’ve been dating my boyfriend for six years now. We have had plenty of Valentine’s Day memories that we laugh about and love to reminisce about too. There was a year where we were planning on going out to a fancy dinner, but a huge snow squall hit on Valentine’s evening.

We stayed in and watched Netflix with our dog and had the best time. Then there were three separate years I won the same restaurant’s Valentine’s Day contest. It got embarrassing by the third year and my boyfriend and I laughed how each consecutive year we would get just a little less prizes—eliminating roses, wine and free dessert.

They are still three of the best meals we’ve ever had with the best restaurant staff! My boyfriend always likes to buy me flowers or a sweet card or just a little something to make the day extra special too. Of course we always spoil our English bulldog Moe too. The memories we’ve made have created a deeper sort of love.

Throughout my life, I’ve always loved and appreciated Valentine’s Day. While its meaning has changed over the years, or I’ve focused more on a particular kind of love (friend love, familial love, self love, the love I have for my partner) the central theme has always been love.

I believe the world can always be a kinder place, so this Valentine’s Day, no matter what you choose to do, be kind and show some love. Chances are, someone may need it!

Valentine’s Day is great, but what about showing love all year ‘round? Check out this piece.