This Kiss Proves Love Has No Boundries

Have you ever joked that someone is acting “like a girl”? Or that they “look like a lesbian”? Or avoided making eye contact with someone you think is disabled? A new movement called “Love Has No Labels” explores the snap judgments we make in a beautiful PSA, which they launched Tuesday.

In the video, the audience sees skeletons kissing, hugging, and dancing with each other. The first couple seems totally in love; you assume one of the figures is a guy, because of his height difference, with his girlfriend. But when the couple emerges from behind the X-ray screen, they’re both women, and the crowd nervously laughs at its preconceived notions.

The “Love Has No Labels” website explains that while most Americans agree everyone should be treated in a respectful and fair manner, many of us report sometimes feeling discriminated against and accidentally discriminating ourselves. The “Love Has No Labels” project hopes to reduce unintentional discrimination, or implicit bias, by calling attention to the subconscious judgments we make every day.

“To end bias, we need to become aware of it,” the project states. “And then we need to do everything within our power to stop it. In ourselves, others, and institutions. The world will be a better place for it.”

Curated by Lesley

Original Article


The Scientifically Proven Best Way To Kiss

I think we can all agree that when it comes to love and romance, it definitely takes two to tango. Sometimes, from the moment you lock eyes with that guy you’ve been crushing on, it can be hard to think about anything else except when you’ll have the perfect fairytale. But according to Buzzfeed’s video, a staggering 59% of students “have said their initial attraction ended after the first kiss.”:

Even though it sounds crazy (and a bit ridiculous, to be honest) that a kiss was the be-all end-all for some, it sort of makes sense. No matter how head over heels we are for someone, having anot so satisfactory kiss would put a damper on things. But if you’ve been wondering what tips and tricks will send sparks everytime, learning how to kiss the right way (according to science!) is the first step.

Girls, not only is eye contact a major difference between a dud and a success, employing tactics that’ll make it last will work in your favor. After all, “Your lips have one of the largest concentration of nerves than anywhere else on the body. These nerves send millions of signals to both you and your partners brains, releasing a rush of feel good hormones…This hormonal and chemical exchange will help you and your partner decide to pursue something more.”

So get ready to pucker up and put your skills to the test.

Original Article


What Kissing Does for Your Marriage

What’s in a kiss? Far more than what meets the lips. Regardless of which part of our mate’s face or body receives attention, the puckering and pressing of the lips conveys affection and value. You kiss when you love somebody.

The Philosophy of a Kiss

What does a kiss mean? When lip-to-lip, you have been welcomed into their personal space. The response says they are agreeable, accessible and vulnerable. This overpowering sense of physical connection is spoken with words and verified in the eyes. A kiss is a great thing.

What is the real value of a kiss? It is best when it is held sacred. I told my daughters in their dating years, “a kiss from a Currie is something very special. Don’t just give them to anybody.” This expression of fondness is like a promise. It signifies, “I am exclusive with you…you are my one and only.” That kind of kiss says something.

The Physics of a Kiss

What makes a kiss work? Proximity. You don’t kiss from a distance. To smooch well, you are in their face. Generally, the longer the kiss, the more intimate the intention.

The placement of the kiss says a lot too. Societal norms reveal that a kiss on the cheek is friendship, on the forehead is comfort, on the nose is play, on the lips is love, and on the neck screams a desire for more. There are kisses of compassion, pecks of play, and smooches displaying affection. There is also deeply passionate kissing- a part of sexual foreplay. Kissing shouldn’t only lead to sex but always needs to be part of great sex.

Many couples have lost the art of kissing. Good kissing is often and varied. Little kisses lead to more meaningful ones. More kissing leads to more closeness. Add the frequent kisses of connection when saying hello or good-bye. One of my favorites is the reunion kiss- those moments at the airport when I plant a big one and pick up my wife and swing her around. It never gets old.

The Physiology of a Kiss

Why does kissing feel so good? The God-created secret behind this pleasure is that the lips are the most sensitive region of the body over the genitals and fingertips. It’s the thinnest skin covering an extensive set of nerve-endings. Kissing feels so good because lips were designed to feel so good.

But stick with me – there’s more. A kiss is so powerful because it can set off at least four chemical explosions inside you.

First, pheromones are airborne chemicals often referred to as ‘chemistry’ between people. Natural human scents are emitted unconsciously by all people and when smelt by someone in a close exchange – like a kiss – can elicit strong reactions of attraction or aversion.

Next is the rush of adrenaline that is produced in high-stress or physically exhilarating situations. A kiss can literally “make your heart race” because with adrenaline, there is an increase in heart rate, blood pressure and dilation of pupils. You feel the surge and it feels good.

Further, pleasure centers of the brain become active with the surprise and excitement of a good kiss. It can trigger a release of dopamine, another hormone that brings a sense of giddiness or euphoria associated with romantic love. You get that feel good all over sensation.

Finally, a kiss can move beyond romantic attraction to deep attachment. When the affection is right and the commitment real, there will be a release of oxytocin that evokes feelings of contentment, reductions in anxiety, and feelings of calmness and security around a mate. A deep bond is created.

The Psychology of a Kiss

What does a good kiss from the right person do? It brings a sense of well-being, belonging, and acceptance. There’s the joy of loving and being loved. It builds self-esteem with the confidence that you are known and still loved. Kissing burns calories, relieves stress and men who kiss their spouses good-bye in the morning are said to live 5 years longer. Enjoy these great benefits of kissing in marriage.

Kiss more the people that really matter and kiss far less the people that matter not.

Keep kissing in your marriage. Kiss for these and more reasons. Kiss much more often. Right now, ask yourself, how many times each day do I kiss my mate? Do I vary the types of kisses I give? What’s preventing me from expressing my affection more?

Remember: You’ll never regret putting your marriage and family first and sealing it with a kiss. Pass this on to someone who needs the reminder of what kissing can do for a marriage.

© Dr. Dave Currie, June 2010


Curated by Erbe

Original Article

Many Faces of Romance

Love comes in many shapes, sizes and ways of connecting. We should all be free to love and celebrate the love, intimacy, friendship and sexuality of relationships.Many Faces of Romance


Curated by Erbe
Original Source

Pucker up for the Best Kiss

Don’t make these kissing mistakes to share a hot, steamy kiss! 

Stop thinking so much about your next move. This is not chess

​1. Don’t put thy tongue before thy mouth.

Some people lead with the tongue and I truly don’t understand why. The tongue is a garnish: If things are going well with the tongue then cool, use more tongue. Otherwise, keep the training wheels on for a while, lest you scare her.Closeup of pair women mouths kissing

2. Stop thinking so much about your next move.

This is not chess. ​​It’s kissing. And while it’s tempting to want to overanalyze what the other person will probably do next so you can be #prepared, all it really does is take you out of the moment, which the opposite of where you want to be.

3. You can only take teasing so far before you become a diiiick.

So when you keep pulling away like you’re trying to tease your girl, eventually she’s going to feel like you’re screwing with her, which honestly? You are.

4. Definitely try to control your saliva so it does not become a river that runs through you both.

When guys don’t seem to understand this and you only discover that fact because you are drowning in a sea of their spit and you feel like you need a cup to spit some of it into? Yeah. That.

Top 10 Reasons to Kiss

…there are actual Kiss Scientists who study kissing.

I’ll admit it, I have a beautiful professionally framed copy of “The Kiss” by Gustav Klimt hanging in my home. I was fortunate to travel a lot while growing up, and I spent a lot of time in museums. For some reason, I became fascinated with seeing paintings of people kissing.

Was it something that people did everywhere?

I began to notice how open to PDA people were country to country in their kissing. I couldn’t stop watching.

By junior high, I remember asking my friends how often they saw their parents kissing and was surprised many said never. See, I loved seeing my parents kiss each other: It made them seem more real to me. I didn’t realize at the time, but there are actual Kiss Scientists who study kissing. They are called Philematologists and they have discovered a wide range of benefits of kissing such as:

1. Kissing lowers stress.

It decreases the stress hormone cortisol and increases serotonin levels in the brain. Kissing has also been measured to lower anxiety and has similar benefits to meditation.

2. Kissing makes us happier.

It improves our mood by increasing endorphins, which are our feel-good hormones.

“Happiness is like a kiss – it feels best when you give it to someone else.” ~ Author Unknown

3. Kissing keeps us healthy.

It improves our immunity by releasing antibodies that kill bacteria. And kissing helps us prevent cavities by increasing saliva that washes our teeth. It has also been shown that our saliva secretes natural antibiotics when we kiss.

“Never a lip is curved with pain?That can’t be kissed into smile again.”? ~ Brete Harte

4. Kissing calms us down and promotes pleasure.

It increases levels of oxytocin otherwise known as the “love hormone” which calms us. Kissing also reduces pain through our saliva which contains a kind of anesthetic and increases pleasure by releasing dopamine.

“Your hugs and kisses are like the stars that light up my life when things get dark.” – Author Unknown

5. Kissing strengthens our relationships.

It promotes togetherness and couples who kiss regularly live five years longer than those who don’t.

“A kiss seals two souls for a moment in time.” ~ Levende Waters

Top 10 Reasons To Kiss List:

  • Lowers blood pressure
  • Decreases cortisol stress hormone
  • Increases serotonin
  • Reduces pain
  • Increases oxytocin
  • Improves immunity
  • Fights off cavities
  • Increases dopamine
  • Improves mood
  • Lowers anxiety

There are plenty more benefits to kissing…but I am guessing that you already have your favorite reasons.  What’s my favorite kissing moment, you ask? When you can feel your partner smiling as you kiss each other. Kissing makes us smile more!

Curated by Erbe
Original Article

Kissing–How to Absolutely Freshen It Up

Kiss Me Quick, And Then Keep Doing It

Look, I know you’re an adult.  You’ve been in the kissing game for a long time, and I know you’ve got your methods, but like all activities, you can always improve the fundamentals and up your game.

First, I’m going to go over a list of don’ts.  Shocking as it is, I have experienced all of these with men over 30.  I am submitting this list as a public service.

What Absolutely NOT to do:

Tip 1:  Slobber. Always Something There To Remind Me

Make sure to cover the whole bottom half of the girl’s face with an even layer of your spit.  Imagine a dotted line from ear to ear, across her nose, then reaching down to her chin, and try to cover that whole area.  Hormones are tricky things, and you don’t want to walk away from this adventure without her being able to smell your lunch on her upper lip.

Tip 2: Don’t forget to cover every tiny detail of the mouth with your tongue!  Ever!

Nobody wants to think about the worst case scenario, but a real modern lothario is going to have to accept the possibility that some of his conquests may go missing or die.  How can you help?  Well, think of every kissing session as an opportunity to take in information.   If you’ve spent some time getting hot and heavy and you could not assist the police in making a detailed plaster cast of the inside of  “the victim’s” mouth, you’ve wasted everyone’s time.  Touch every tooth with your tongue.  Now, do it again.  Make notes.  Try to see how far you can get it down her throat.

Tip 3: Strangle Hold Hands

It’s well known that there’s nothing that makes a girl feel safer and more cared for than when someone, preferably James Franco, softly caresses her cheek, then gently cradles her face in his hands to kiss her.  Now, imagine how much better she’d feel if imaginary James Franco had his hands loosely but solidly around her throat!

Tip 4: Hickeys

Hickeys serve a lot of purposes.  For one, they are marking your territory, like a dog pissing on a tree.  For second, if you are judicious about the size and location of your hickeys, they can protect your property because you’ve marked a pretty girl in a hideous manner.  If you are dating a particularly naive girl, she may form the impression that you are a sexy vampire, a la “Edward.”  How exciting for everyone!  I once saw a Dunkin’ Donuts employee in Plano, TX who was wearing a temporary turtleneck of hickeys, covering him from his jawline down into his uniform, and although it was nauseating, I thought, “Well, at least somebody loves him.”  It may have been a series of unfortunate birthmarks.  What am I, a scientist?

NOW Here’s How to ABSOLUTELY Freshen Up KISSING:

The lips are the most publicly available erogenous zone.  Kissing involves all the senses, we’re communicating by touch and smell, and even with pheromones, those weird, invisible strings that draw us together.  Kissing is a kind of magic, and it doesn’t get enough attention.

Mirror Man:

Kissing is something that two people do together, so try not to be too dominant or submissive.  It’s a give-and-take, so feel where your partner is and try to match it.  Mirror their pressure, rhythm, and frequency.

Change it Up:

Build up to crescendos, adding pressure and urgency, then take it slow and gentle.  Remember that closed-mouth kisses can be both incredibly tender and sensual, mix them in with, as we used to say, “Frenching”.  Make variations in your method until your partner thinks you’ve been kissing other people, and then say no, Virginia told me to do it, and then they’ll say who the hell is that?  Now you’re fighting, and we all know how erotic that can be!

Take Your Time:

Too often as adults, kissing is given a short shrift as we gallop towards intercourse, but we forget what an important part of foreplay it is.  Remember when you were a teenager, and you’d kiss until your mouth was chapped and your eyes were out of focus, just making out in a dark corner until an authority figure found you?  Remember how fun that was?  Let your partner know you’re going to stop at first base for fifteen or twenty minutes before you continue with more foreplay.  Set a timer on your phone. It won’t get boring, it’ll just make you more excited to hit the bedroom!

When You Are Kissing These Hormones Get Released

What’s in a kiss?

In the average lifetime, most people spend 20,160 minutes kissing. A passionate kiss can burn up to five calories per minute. The longest kiss, recorded in Thailand in February 2013 by Guinness World records, lasted 58 hours, 35 minutes and 58 seconds. But these philamatology1 factoids2 don’t really explain why people kiss.

Kissing not only feels good, it’s good for you. It relieves stress and releases epinephrine into your blood, making it pump faster, which signals a reduction of LDL cholesterol. But while “swapping spit” in today’s culture most often denotes sexual attraction, there’s more to it than that:

“’Mucous membranes inside the mouth are permeable to hormones such as testosterone. Through open-mouth kissing, men introduced testosterone into a woman’s mouth’ which ‘is absorbed through the mucous membranes… and increases arousal and the likelihood that she will engage in reproductive behavior.3

But because some cultures don’t include kissing in their mating rituals, it’s possible the first kiss was given by a mother to her child rather than being shared between a couple.

Psychologists conjecture that kiss-feeding – exchanging pre-masticated food from one mouth to another was how babies received the nutrients needed to grow up strong and healthy (as they’re not always available from breast milk). This jump starts the digestion process and makes vitamins like B-12 more easily absorbable.

Actress Alicia Silverstone’s blog recently included a video of herself kiss-feeding her child4, nicknamed Bear, offering a clue to the meaning of mouth-to-mouth contact from a child’s perspective:

“I just had a delicious breakfast of miso soup, collards and radish steamed and drizzled with flax oil, cast iron mochi with nori wrapped outside, and some grated daikon. Yum! I fed Bear the mochi and a tiny bit of veggies from the soup from my mouth to his. It’s his favorite… and mine.

He literally crawls across the room to attack my mouth if I’m eating.”


How Cuddling, Breastfeeding and Natural Weaning Relates to Babies’ Emotional Health

There’s a school of thought that contends that the cuddling, visual attachment and emotional bonding that takes place between mother and child during breastfeeding and/or kiss-feeding helps the child establish healthy attitudes toward food later in life. Subsequent baby-led weaning (BLW), which includes premasticating regular whole foods in lieu of serving processed baby foods and spoon feeding, is said to:

  • Enhance mealtime enjoyment
  • Help reduce the child’s obesity risk
  • Promote natural jaw development
  • Improve eye-hand coordination and dexterity

But it’s also said to help children develop confidence and security in their future relationships. Of course, what you feed your baby after breastfeeding also is crucial. Merging from breastfeeding on demand to gradually introducing regular foods is what humans have adapted to do.

According to Dr. Kevin Boyd, whose anthropological studies led him to ascertain that children’s dental health depends very much on this transition, as well as an absence of carbohydrates and sugar in their diets.

Interestingly, babies up to four months old can only focus on objects eight to ten inches from their faces – about the same distance between infants and their mother’s face when breastfeeding5 – suggesting that facial recognition is the beginning of emotional, not just physical, attachment.

The phenomenon of pareidolia – seeing faces in flowers and cloud formations – may reinforce the possibility that the search for emotional attachment may be one of mankind’s most elemental instincts.

Scientific Animal Testing Shows How Baby Monkeys Attach to Another ‘Mother’

In the 1950s, Dr. Harry Harlow conducted experiments on attachment at the University of Wisconsin which today would undoubtedly be considered cruel. Harlow separated young monkeys from their mothers soon after birth and placed them in cages with two “fake” mothers.

One was an immovable doll made of soft cloth, while the second, mechanical “mother” was made of cold, unyielding wire which nonetheless provided food. The young monkeys were then confronted with a scary, threatening contraption. But rather than running to the mechanical food source, they invariably scampered to the soft, cuddly doll mothers, showing that comfort was more important to them than food.

Harlow also created a rejecting “mother” that used a blast of pressurized air to push the baby monkeys away. But they clung even tighter to these mother figures. The scientists observed that the “rejection” actually strengthened the baby monkeys’ determination to hang on, and essentially, attach. In the 1960s, similar experiments conducted by Dr. Eckhard Hess6 at the University of Chicago involved electric shocks to keep ducklings from attaching to figures they imprinted on. But this only strengthened the ducklings’ behavior and made them follow even closer.

Experiments by A.E. Fisher on puppies in 1955 divided them into three groups. The first was treated kindly, while the second group was treated harshly and punished whenever they approached the researchers. The third group experienced random kindness mixed with punishment, so they never knew what to expect. But the third group of puppies formed the strongest attachment to the researchers. Guy Murchie7 dubbed this the polarity principal, which says the stress of uncertainty is one of the strongest factors affecting attachment, love and dependence.

The Paradoxical Nature of Attaching… What Doesn’t Comfort May Make You Stronger

These clinical tests introduce a paradox, which can be valuable teachers into the human psyche. Like the baby monkeys, ducklings and puppies, uncertainty can affect attachments and the most deep-seated behaviors – including who and how you kiss.

But what happens when early attachment was “iffy,” if not altogether absent, or when later attachments or relationships leave you feeling neglected or even abandoned? This is just one type of stress you can address using the Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT), which can help you eliminate emotional “scarring,” reduce the emotional impact of memories that trigger emotional distress and reprogram your body’s response to emotional stressors. EFT along with eating well, getting adequate sleep and exercising regularly, can help restore your energy meridians as well as your mind/body balance – whether or not you spend 20,160 minutes of your life kissing.

Curated by Erbe
Original Article

Make Mine a Make Out

Look, almost everyone likes sex.  Presidents and college students and married people all like it  and think it’s great.  But whatever happened to just making out?

In the beginning, there was kissing.  Lots and lots of sweet, hot, open-mouthed kissing.  And it was good.  We’d walk around in a daze after hours of it.  And then we moved to second base.  And lo, it was also pretty good.  Bras were stuffed under couches, not to be seen again until moving day.  Slowly, a bunch of kids who knew next to nothing about baseball moved towards a home run- and many of us never looked back.

Look, almost everyone likes sex.  Presidents and college students and married people all like it  and think it’s great.  But whatever happened to just making out?  You know, getting hot and heavy, kissing until your mouth is all tingly and puffy, feeling hands inching ever closer towards the edge of your bra- it’s fun and super hot!

Kissing Feels Great:

Kissing reduces cortisol, a stress chemical in the body.  Fifteen minutes of kissing measurably reduces levels of cortisol in academic laboratory make-out tests.  Kissing and making out releases all kinds of feel-good chemicals and hormones, including oxytocin, the love drug.  That makes making out a natural painkiller, and it also bonds you to a new person or an established partner.  Men like kissing because it’s a way to introduce more testosterone into women’s systems, which makes sex even sexier.  Women like kissing men because it’s a way to assess their appropriateness as a biological mate.   We’re usually looking for people whose genetic makeup is dissimilar to one’s own, which makes for stronger offspring.  Kissing and pheromones transfer a lot of that information about another person- unfortunately, kissing can’t help determine whether one still uses a skateboard as their main mode of transportation.

Kissing is Intense:

Kissing is done with one’s eyes closed, not just because it’s a social norm, but because kissing provides so much great information and stimulation it’s better to cut down on visual stimuli- also, because while you’re kissing, your partner probably looks like they have one big eye in the middle of their forehead.

It’s Low Risk:

For single people, kissing and making out packs a lot of the same heart-stopping thrills as sex, but without the downsides of one-time hookups- there’s virtually no STD or pregnancy scares, and it’s not as embarrassing to run into someone you made out with once at the Trader Joe’s.  If you’ve just started seeing someone, think about making out a time or two before you start having sex- you’ll be more comfortable with each other and probably have even more fun building intimacy and looking forward to the main course.

It Makes Sex Hotter:

For couples, making out makes sex hotter- building anticipation and just having fun with each other.  Try making rules- set a ten minute timer that’s only for kissing, then another timer that’s only for touching each other, and so on- by the time you get to sex you’ll be completely bonkers and have a wonderful time!

It’s Portable:

Making out can be done with your clothes on, or mostly on, so you can do it in a car or in a gazebo, in a movie theater or methadone clinic, or lots of places it wouldn’t be that great to have sex.  It’s not polite to do in a Denny’s, but many have.

In closing, the next time you’re with someone you’re into, consider making more out of making out!

Do These Folks Know How to Kiss?

How to kiss right… and how to avoid the mistakes of kissing the wrong way!

Good Looking Couple Kissing At The Beach

Kissing is one of the most sensual and enjoyable things that two humans can share. Learning how to kiss right can make your relationships more passionate, more sensual, and a lot more fun.

In this video, learn what men and women say is the “wrong way” to kiss, and then learn how to kiss right!

Curated by Erbe
Original Video

Cuddle Therapy is Most Desired By…

We all crave some sort of physical attention. But is it possible to get this without having sex?

Personally, I’ve always desired sensual relationships more than sexual. This could be because of my asexual orientation, or simply because I’m a particularly sensitive person. I never really fantasized about sex. I’ve had sex plenty of times, sure, but it was never my preferred method of intimacy. Because of this, I don’t particularly desire anything beyond close friendships. It’s perfectly possible to have an intimate emotional relationship to someone that isn’t a significant other without it leading to sex.

Preferring Sensual Over Sexual

It takes a very rare bond to engage in sensual acts with a friend. An unnameable kind of connection that requires a very specific type of validation. In my case, I tend to crave physical touch from my friends. Instead of getting drunk and having sex with a stranger, I would get drunk and hug my friends a lot. Especially men, because of how myself and plenty of other women have been conditioned to seek male validation in every form.

I remember being with my ex-boyfriend and trying to get him to be sensual with me. He was a very aggressively sexual person, so it always had to turn into some sort of sex act. He wouldn’t be able to cuddle for too long before we ended up with our clothes off. I would try to lay my head in his lap get him to play with my hair, but he just didn’t get it. At the end of the day, I realized I wanted more of a platonic relationship with him and other men I dated, leading to my identification as asexual.

Types of Asexuality

There is a wide spectrum of asexuality, and can range from:

  • Having no desire for sex
  • Sexual attraction to someone only if you have a specific emotional connection
  • Aromantic seek physical non-sexual touch while maintaining romantic attraction
  • Desire for Cuddling and deep emotional conversations, but never a desire to kiss

The existence of sexual acts do not define a relationship, as it’s perfectly possible to have a healthy romantic connection without them.

Cuddling Therapy

There is a market for people who seek intimacy with a stranger. There are also professionals out there who make a living by cuddling people.

A website called advertises “therapeutic, non-sexual cuddle session(s) with a certified professional cuddler”. However, booking a cuddler for $80 an hour might not be as effective as cuddling with someone you love, platonic or not. Platonic intimacy is still grounded in a personal attachment, so to some professional cuddling does not hold the same kind of significance.

The fact that the cuddling website specifies that it is “non-sexual” is a crucial point. In a way, this kind of service almost becomes a type of platonic prostitution, in a sense. While it may not hold the same significance as cuddling with a friend or significant other, it does demonstrate an alternative for a solution to emotional and physical desire, specifically for those who don’t necessarily seek out sex.


Could platonic intimacy lead to something more? Sure. In my experience, romantic crushes can easily develop without any sort of sexual connotation as a result of this kind of intimacy. I’ve always been the type to meet someone and become their friend before becoming romantically attracted to them, as the idea of dating someone for the purpose of getting into a relationship scares me. My desire for the person grows, wanting them close to me physically without even realizing that I’m developing a crush on them. It’s hard to explain how such a thing happens, and as an asexual person it can be hard to distinguish a crush from a desire to love in a platonic way.

Kissing Just to Kiss

In the case of more sexually driven people, however, it can be very common for platonic cuddling to turn into something more. Many people are able to jump from nonsexual intimacy to sex very quickly. I remember trying to explain to someone that I desired to make out with a guy I knew, to which that person replied that maybe I scared him off by wanting to sleep with him. I realized that the mindset that many sexual people have is that kissing leads directly to sex, and in many cases it’s true, but the idea of not going beyond first base is much more desireable to others.

So is it possible to cuddle with a friend or loved one and not have it turn to sex? Absolutely. It honestly depends on the level of the person’s sex drive, and how they identify themselves. For many people including myself, it’s the primary way of demonstrating affection, and can lead to a very special strong emotional bond.

The act of kissing or cuddling with a close friend can be more than enough for some.

The Love and Kisses That Are Motivating Sports

“If kissing us on the cheek before games gets us wins, then it works.” ~ Garrett Davis

ANNAPOLIS, Md. — When the University of Houston’s football players arrive for a game, they know what to expect as a prelude to the coming hours of brutality as they file into the stadium: a kiss on the cheek from their head coach, Tom Herman.

It is an unusual ritual in a sport that embodies America’s most rigid ideals of manhood.

“A kiss on the cheek is when he shows his love for us,” Houston safety Garrett Davis said, adding, “No one here is thinking, ‘Oh, I shouldn’t let him kiss me.’”

Physical expressions of affection certainly exist in big-time sports. Nothing says “Good job!” in baseball like a firm pat on the behind from a coach, and in international soccer it is not uncommon to see teammates peck each other on the cheek after a big play.

But kisses in football’s gladiatorial culture seem as incongruous as a Gatorade shower at the ballet.

For Herman, 41, there is no better way to demand the painful sacrifices of the game than to forthrightly convey his affection for his players.

“How do you motivate a human being to do things against his own nature?” Herman said in an interview. “There’s two things: love and fear. And to me, love wins every time.”

Davis said the players were taken aback early last season, Herman’s first as the head coach, when Herman planted a kiss on the strength coach Yancy McKnight during practice. Then he extended the ritual to all his players before their first game.

“I’m a bit confused as to why it’s garnered so much attention and why it’s seemed so odd,” Houston Coach Tom Herman, 41, said of his ritual of kissing and hugging players.

“I was not expecting it, but knowing him, I was not surprised at all,” tight end Tyler McCloskey said.

Alluding to that first game, a 52-24 victory over Tennessee Tech, Davis said, “If kissing us on the cheek before games gets us wins, then it works.”