The Origins of Valentine’s Day Are Not What You Think

January 30, 2017January 22, 2024 by zfortadminin LOVE

Digging in to the Roots of Love on Wings, Beloved of the Day, and the original Roman festival

In the Western world, Valentine’s Day was observed as long ago as during the Roman occupation of the British Isles. According to the American Book Days, the original connection between Saint Valentine and a lovers festival was quite likely accidental. Saint Valentine was martyred on February 14 in A.D. 270, and his name became associated with the Roman spring festival of Lupercalia, which was held on February 15. This festival, with its theme of fertility, apparently involved putting the names of young women into an urn, to be drawn out by men for “beloved of the year” pairing. Frank Staff, in The Valentine and Its Origins, notes the significance of a popular medieval belief that mid-February was the time birds paired for mating and that the associated idea of love-on-wings became connected to Saint Valentine and human lovers during that period.

Whatever its true origin, by the sixteenth and seventeenth centuries, Valentine’s Day had become a popular holiday, especially in Great Britain. It was a topic for poems and song lyrics, many written expressly for the occasion, such as John 14’ly’s “Apelles Song” 1584 in which Cupid and Alexander’s true love, Campaspe, play cards for kisses. Cupid unsuccessfully stakes his mother’s doves and sparrows on the game: a clear reference to the medieval association I have already noted. In addition, exchanging gifts-many times expensive ones-had become the custom on this date in the homes of the wealthy.

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How To Show Love By Making a Difference This Valentine’s Day

February 1, 2018January 22, 2024 by Jillian Pretzelin LOVE, Mind, Wellness

Trying to give back this year? Here are some great ways to show your community some love on Valentine’s Day.

Valentine’s Day is all about love, relationships, and romance. It can be so much fun, but it can get a little cliché too. Okay, okay, it can get a lot cliché.

If you’re in a long term relationship, you might not feel like doing the traditional chocolate-and-flowers-thing every single year, and if you’re living the single life, Valentine’s might feel like one giant eye roll.

This year, why not consider celebrating Valentine’s in a different way?

While so many of us get into the giving spirit during December, most people forget to give back during the rest of the year. Valentine’s Day is the perfect time to help your the community and show love to those who need it the most.

Whether you’re celebrating being single, or you’re looking for an original date idea for you and your beau, these ways to give back on Valentine’s will surely warm your heart, and make someone’s else’s holiday much brighter too.

1. Your date isn’t the only one who likes flowers. Help brighten a room at a nursing home.

In college, I helped plan a Valentine’s Day event with lots of balloons, flowers, and so much pizza. Of course, at the end of the night we were left with a giant mess, but we were told to save the centerpieces.

Someone on the party planning committee had the idea to pack up all the flowers and send them to the local retirement community. It sounded like a good idea until I found out that it was my job to put the vases filled in boxes and wake up early the next day to drive them over.

When I got there, I expected to unload the boxes and be on my way, but one of the women at the front desk stopped me. She said they didn’t have anywhere to put them in the lobby, and I’d have to drop off the flowers to the individual rooms.

Honestly, I didn’t want to pass them out, I didn’t know anyone in the hospital and I wasn’t in the mood to socialize, but the moment I shuffled into the first bedroom, I knew how important it was to do just that.

I met a lot of seniors who weren’t doing well, who were sick and lonely, and I loved dropping off some flowers to brighten their day. Plus, most residents really appreciated getting to talk to someone new, and knowing that I had made their morning a little better really made my Valentine’s Day.

This year, consider bringing a stranger flowers. You don’t have to throw a party to find some florals, but you also don’t have to break the bank getting bouquets. You can get involved with a charity like Random Acts of Flowers, and pass out flowers as a team. Or, if you want to fly solo, any stores have Valentine’s Day arrangements on sale on the 15th, and picking some up and bringing them to your local retirement home or hospital will make any resident feel special.

2. Everyone Deserves a Valentine’s Day Card

While passing out florals might sound nice, maybe flowers just aren’t your thing. Instead, you might consider making a few cards.

I adore Valentine’s cards: they were so much fun to collect in elementary school and now I love getting sweet cards from my fiancé every year. But these Valentine’s cards don’t have to stop with people you know. The My Golden Valentine project has been making a difference by writing cards for people who may not have many people around for the holiday.

This year, they’re hoping to deliver 10,000 cards to assisted living and nursing homes in North Dakota and Nebraska. That’s a lot of love!

But even even if you’re not in the North Dakota/Nebraska area, don’t think you can’t get involved. You can write your own cards and deliver them to your local nursing home. Plus, you can make an event out of it by inviting friends to write cards and watch Valentine’s-themed movies. Or, if you have kids or young nieces and nephews, this could make for a great kid-friendly Valentine’s activity.

3. Bring Valentine’s Day to your local children’s hospital

On Valentine’s Day, kids should be in school making hearts out of construction paper for their parents, but many kids are missing out.

This Valentine’s, you can make a difference by volunteering at your local children’s hospital or joining a toy drive. I used to volunteer in a children’s hospital, talking to long-term patients and keeping them company. It was so rewarding, but there are so many other ways to get involved too.

One barber shop has worked hard for more than a decade to collect stuffed monkeys to give to children in hospitals and children who have been neglected.

Something as simple as a stuffed monkey can brighten a child’s day and make them feel special on Valentine’s.

So, whether you’re donating toys or if you plan to get more involved with a hospital, like with the CHOC Children’s Hospital volunteer program, your effort could mean a lot to a child in need of some Valentine’s spirit.

4. Show your love to some furry friends.

One of my favorite places to volunteer is at animal shelters. Come on, what better way to spend your time than with cute, lovable animals?

And the animals, and the shelters, really appreciate your effort.

There are so many animals that don’t have homes and they need a lot of love, so shelters often depend on volunteers to help show love to those pups and kitty-cats.

Celebrate V-Day by taking a shelter dog for a walk or playing with some animals at your local rescue. These furry friends will appreciate your attention, and who knows, maybe you’ll fall in love and bring one home as a Valentine’s Day gift to yourself.

5. Donate Blood

This gives a whole other meaning to “heart day.” While romance might get your blood pumping, donating blood can help you show love to the people who need it.

Of course, at first I was squeamish about giving blood, but I’ve found that it is totally worth it to know that you are making a difference. Plus, it’s the perfect way to celebrate Valentine’s Day.

It doesn’t take long to donate, it costs nothing to do, and you get a cookie out of the deal. And hey, you deserve some extra sweets on Valentine’s Day! Check out blood drives near you, The Red Cross is always out and about, and could be hosting a blood drive near you!

6. Give a gift that really means something

For me, the hardest part of Valentine’s Day isn’t finding something to do, it’s finding the right gift. I always get something for my fiancé, but I also like to get something for my mom, and who could forget my BFF (gotta celebrate Galentine’s Day!)

I would usually end up buying a few trinkets and maybe a picture frame or two, but I know that a lot of these presents were ending up just being clutter.

This year, make a pact with your sweetie or your best pals to get each other a donation to each other’s favorite charities. It will mean a lot to the charity, and you’ll feel good doing it.

Valentine’s Day is the perfect opportunity to get involved in your community and show your love to those who will need it the most. With these six ideas, your Valentine’s Day will be as memorable, and meaningful as ever.

Puns, Regicide and Snowball Fights: One Couple’s Celebration of St. Valentine’s Day

February 14, 2018January 22, 2024 by ElisaShoenbergerin DATING ADVICE, LOVE, RELATIONSHIPS

Some couples have romantic dinners or go on exotic vacations for Valentine’s Day. We took a different route.

My husband and I find something decidedly unsexy to celebrate this day in February. Even from the very beginning, we’ve found creative ways to play with the concept of the day.

Nothing says I love you like Shakespearean regicide.

Our first Valentine’s day was spent seeing A Year in Magical Thinking by Joan Didion that was her true story of her attempt to deal with the death of her husband and daughter in the same year. Sexy, no? It still remains one of the best plays I’ve ever seen.

The following year, we made a point of seeing Shakespeare’s Richard II that deals with a man child whose bad decisions end up resulting in the loss of his throne and his life. Not one of Shakespeare’s better known romantic plays. And so on and so forth.

Two times, we’ve done crisis rooms as Valentine’s day adventures. The first was part of “The Last Defenders” where we had to dress in orange jumpsuits and work with 15 other people to try to prevent a nuclear holocaust. Sadly, we failed and everyone died.

Last year, we gathered a group of friends together in order to solve a crisis room, one of those new interactive puzzle rooms where you have an hour to solve a problem. We succeeded in escaping from a runaway train car through a combination of collective problem-solving and inspiration.

Another year we were teetotalers for the Chicago Poetry Bordello, waving signs against the forbidden drink and protesting outside the venue in a snowstorm. But that’s an entirely different story.

For me, Valentine’s Day was always a little silly.

I don’t mean that the holiday is silly in itself. I have yet to shake the initial meaning of the day as a child. In grammar school, I loved Valentine’s Day since it meant punny valentines and candy. Think “I Choo-Choo Choose You” valentine from The Simpsons.

It felt like a lesser Halloween but in the middle of the winter. Sometimes, I would even hand make the valentines because it was good to make things by hand.

Even later on in my life, I still found myself drawn to the joviality of the day. I felt disconnected from the romantic overtones, the marketing that said that you were less than fully in love unless you bought them XYZ.

Even in college, I remember buying ridiculous animal valentines with punderful sayings and giving them to my friend. I even sent one in an envelope to a friend in another state.

I learned in college that not everyone felt the same way.

Everyone had a ticket on the Anti-Valentine’s Day Train. It was everyone. It didn’t matter your gender or your relationship status. I heard nothing from my friends who I sent valentines to in other states. Talking to folks in college, Valentine’s Day was perceived as this Hallmark holiday, another mark of our over consumptive society. It was a holiday to make single people feel bad. If it was noted at all, it was with a groan. And maybe a shopping spree for discount candy on the 15th.

Even my then boyfriend was vehemently opposed to it. I asked him about it and his reply was “Shouldn’t you be treating your loved one well everyday?” I had no response to that. So we didn’t do much for the day.

In graduate school, I once asked a friend to dinner on Valentine’s Day. I remembered that it was the holiday since I bought her and her boyfriend silly Valentine’s day gift. It was two of those biting sticks with dinosaur heads. The ones where you had a head on a long stick and pressed a button to open and close the mouth.

Only after dinner, did it even occur to me that perhaps they wanted to have a romantic night. (She was delighted at the gift and clearly did not have strong Valentine’s Day opinions.)

Things changed delightfully when started dating my now husband

My now husband didn’t seem to have the same strong opinions about the day. And I still enjoyed the wackiness of it.

We treated most of these special events as a bit of a lark. Two weeks before our wedding, we had a joint bachelor party playing laser tag where we were on opposite teams. It made sense given the nature of our relationship. At karaoke, we sing classic love songs like “This is Halloween” or the Clash’s “London Calling” or on very special occasions “God Save the Queen” by the Sex Pistols.

Naturally, our Valentine’s day would continue our strangeness.

This year, as we begin planning for Valentine’s Day, we’re going in a slightly new but entirely appropriate direction. We are thinking more combative…like a snowball fight. But that depends on snow. Or perhaps laser tag like our joint Bachelor’s party.

Either way, we are going to celebrate Valentine’s day in our own way.

Looking for more adventures for Valentine’s Day? Check out The Best Unconventional Date Movies For Your Valentine’s Day or look for ways you can show your community love with How To Show Love By Making a Difference This Valentine’s Day.