So if you just show up as who you are and don’t feel that you have to effort, or do anything at all in order to receive, eventually the right guy will show up. He will offer you those things that are most important to you. You won’t get everything in one person but if you hold out and value yourself, you will attract the most important things on your list.

Now speaking of  lists, I highly recommend this as a practice that I have used in my life repeatedly to continue to attract the type of relationship I desire.  You do need to make those lists, as they will bring you copious amounts of clarity about all kinds of things you want and don’t want in a relationship. You must get in touch with what you desire and deserve and then you can call it in

So go back a few paragraphs — I know this is a really long post, LOL — but go back a few paragraphs and take some time to write down the answers to those questions. And I don’t mean five minutes, I mean take a week.  Write the answers down one day at a time.  Refine them, delete some, change them.

Until you are clear about what you truly want, you are gambling with the Universe, which will give you whatever you are asking for, consciously or unconsciously.  So become clear and create consciously, as you are otherwise creating unconsciously.   In the meantime you need to show up with the fervent belief and knowledge that you deserve just because you’re you. Stop trying to tell your man who to be or what to do and how to do it. Let him be.

And don’t use your love and affection as leverage or reward.  Love is given freely, or it isn’t love.

If he is truly not a match for you, do the right thing and let both of you out of the relationship. And the next time you meet a guy, if you are a food and wine aficionado and he’s asking you what you like to do and you tell him and then he never takes you to a winery or a great gourmet restaurant, then you know what to do. I’m cracking myself up that I keep picking the food analogies because anyone who knows me personally knows  food is not on my list!

So learn to surrender, it’s the most beautiful aspect of our feminine nature. Not surrendering for someone to have dominion over us, but surrendering to the power within us that has the power to attract all that we could ever need or want.