If You Are Hurting During Thanksgiving, Focus on the Love

So many of us have pain and hurt and loss in our lives. Maybe you have just gone through the death of someone close to you. Maybe you are sick, or someone you love is sick. Maybe you lost your job or your home, or maybe you are feeling uncertain and fearful, in this post-election time. Maybe your family is far away. Maybe your family is complicated and dysfunctional (whose isn’t?). Maybe you’ve just been through a divorce or an intense break-up. Maybe things are changing in your world, more rapidly than you can handle. Whatever you are facing, whatever hurt and pain is going on, this is what I want to say to you:

Look for the Love. 

Wherever you are or aren’t in your life, and wherever you find yourself on Thanksgiving Day, look for the love. Actually search for it. When you are in pain, it is not always easy to see it, and so you have to really look. It might be in a small exchange between you and your Aunt whom you normally don’t get along with. It may be your dog or cat sitting in your lap and wanting to be cuddled. It could be your niece or nephew, making you laugh and feel like a kid again for 10 minutes. Maybe it’s a text message wishing you a happy day, from someone you didn’t expect. Or someone remembering and honoring your loved one, by giving a toast to them, or saying their name out loud on this day. Or maybe it’s just one small moment of kindness, in an otherwise crappy and lonely day. If you look for the love, the love will appear.

Tonight, on this Thanksgiving Eve, I will sit here with the two kitties that my husband and I adopted together all those years ago, and I will put in my DVD of Planes, Trains, and Automobiles. And this time, when I watch it, I will once again notice new things, and see it with new eyes. And when Del is talking out loud in the car to his deceased wife, saying: “I wish you were here with me right now, but I guess that’s not going to happen”, I will know exactly how that feels and what that is. There will be laughter, and tears, and a whole lot of gratefulness, for all the many ways that I have experienced and felt love, and for all the ways in which I will continue to feel love. So, if you feel alone this Thanksgiving, or if things are not the way that you wish they were, look around you. Look within you. Look for the love. It is everywhere. I promise.

Have a Happy Thanksgiving.

Pages: 1 2 3

If You Are Hurting During Thanksgiving, Focus on the Love

About The Author
- is a writer, actor, and stand-up comedian, living in NYC. Her first book: "My Husband Is Not a Rainbow: The Hilariously, Awful Truth About Life, Love, Grief, and Loss", will be released in 2017. Twitter and Instagram is @kelleyiskelley and www.akelleylynnlife.com