He actually wants you to come first.

1. You know that sometimes you have unexciting sex and that’s OK because you have approximately 5 million more times to get it right. ​You know that sometimes sex isn’t always a magical roller coaster ride of puppy dogs riding on unicorns and that’s cool. You don’t obsess over it because you know it’s no biggie. Besides, you guys will just crush it next time because you’re amazing like that.

2. He knows not to push your head down because he does not want to die. That’s just Married Science. He doesn’t want his story to end up on an episode of Law & Order​, so he knows not to be a pushy weirdo.

​3. He actually wants you to come first. This should be nos. 1–50, for real. Its importance cannot be overstated.

​4. He’ll never make you feel weird about not being ready to try anal. Which in turn makes you feel a lot more chill about trying anal with him. The world works in mysterious ways.

5. He treats your smaller boob with respect. Just because she’s tiny doesn’t mean she is without needs! He knows you have nerve endings in both your breasts and uses his mouth accordingly.

6. You’ve come to mutual agreements about which positions are just too hard. I’m looking at you, 69. Now that you’re married, you can drop the facade that it’s super fun and sexy to twist yourself into an actual pretzel just to put a dick in your mouth.