Feeling sexy often has little to do with, well, sex. In fact, building your sexual confidence doesn’t even have to take place in the bedroom. Whether it’s tossing your old, unflattering underwear, finding the right lighting, or taking a yoga class, there are plenty of easy (and fun!) ways to feel hotter than ever. Let these ideas get you started.
1. Splurge on some flirty lingerie.
Who cares what Gisele Bündchen is wearing? The goal is finding styles you feel sexy in. So while a thong might work for one woman, perhaps you’ll feel cuter (and more comfortable) in a pair of boy shorts. If you consider a bold leopard print push-up bra too much, try a more subtle lacy number — it can be just as titillating.
2. Dress the part.
What you’re wearing before you take your clothes off is just as important. For some women, nothing makes them feel hotter than their favorite pair of jeans, whether they’re “skinny” or not. Others may prefer a short skirt or curve-hugging dress. Either way, choose an outfit that flaunts your fave body part — we guarantee you’ll feel bolder in no time.
3. Turn down the lights.
Florescent lighting is nobody’s friend. We’ve all learned this the hard way in many a department store fitting room. On the contrary, the right lighting in your bedroom can make you look and feel like a sex goddess. Light fixtures that illuminate upward are the most flattering, as are lower-wattage bulbs and ones with a pretty blush tint. We also love dimmers, lamps, and candles to set the mood.
4. Wax it off.
There’s something about a smooth bare leg that makes us feel like getting a little frisky. The same can be said for a bikini wax. It may sound like a lot of effort, but you’ll be dying to take your clothes off!
It’s difficult to feel sexy when you’re completely stressed and exhausted. That’s why it’s important to make time for you! Ask your husband to look after the kids while you sleep in one Saturday. Take a yoga class or sip a glass of wine with dinner. We promise, your sex drive will thank you.
6. Break out of your comfort zone.
There’s something kind of arousing about living a little dangerously. Plan a more-daring-than-usual activity like rock climbing or surfing — anything that gets the adrenaline pumping. Not the sporty type? Experiment with wearing a shorter-than-usual skirt or a top that shows a little more cleavage. Even better: Send a sexy text to your partner or suggest watching a racy movie together.
7. Hit the gym.
Research shows that exercise boosts your body image — even if the number on the scale is exactly the same. In fact, a 2009 University of Florida study found that people who exercise but don’t lose fat, feel just as good about their bodies as their more fitter peers. So even if you’re still working towards six-pack abs, you’ll still feel hot.
8. Create your dream fantasy.
Why shouldn’t you be the heroine in your own romance novel? Imagine yourself doing all the sexy things you’d like to do… then do them. Try keeping a journal. Who knows, maybe it will turn out to be the next (erotic) best-seller?
9. Get your partner involved.
Ask him to remind you of all the things he finds attractive about you. Knowing what turns him on will help you to see yourself through his eyes. Then, you can do the same for him.
10. Don’t compare yourself to other women.
Just because Jennifer Aniston looks amazing in a bikini doesn’t mean you have to hide under your T-shirt. Measuring yourself up to not-so-easy-to-attain body images is a recipe for bedroom gloom. Look in the mirror, and take note of what you find sexy. You’ll be surprised by how much you really love your body.
TELL US: How do you make yourself feel more confident in the bedroom?
Curated by Erbe