What are the benefits for you outside the gifts?
I have a higher self esteem and sense of self worth because of these relationships. For me, this provides a safe place to explore and indulge all carnal and sexual desires. It’s a respite from the daily grind of being a tough, ball-busting woman who can ‘handle everything on her own’. At the end of the day, it’s a game. A role-playing fantasy that I find to be much more efficient and satisfying than casually dating and dealing with all the double talk and emotional head games people play.
Do you ever feel shame about this sexual fetish?
Oh my god, never. I have felt more shame getting all dressed up to go to a guy’s place and having ‘just one drink and then dinner’ turn into getting smashed and ordering pizza. That’s a waste of a dress AND my fucking energy and time. There is a handful of ways you can quantify importance or value: time, energy, money. I feel more respected by my Daddy than any guy I have ever dated normally. And it’s not always being naked except for a collar and leash. We go out to eat all the time, he’s taken me on vacation, he takes me shopping if I need anything. I feel more valuable now than I ever have. He will bring me a gift if we meet for coffee or a quick lunch; sex is not always involved when we meet. My self esteem is more easily shattered by a date or a boyfriend checking out other chicks when we’re out; I have honestly never noticed my Daddy do that. He is hyper-focused on me because he has ascribed a value to me. He is sexually dominant, but I am (as should be all subs) the one who reaps the most benefit. He treats me like a treasured jewel.
What’s something that people wouldn’t necessarily expect from this lifestyle?
Most people would be surprised about the amount of affection and respect that is in involved in these relationships. Also, most people would be surprised to learn that subs can dominate from the bottom; if we don’t approve of or consent to something, it does not fly. And the majority of us refer to sex as ‘playing’; we understand that the role playing is a game. These relationships have consistently been the most functional, straight-forward relationships I’ve ever had. No emotional head games, no bullshit.