8. Take Orgasm Off The Table

Orgasm is the cherry on top of the sundae when it comes to sex, but many people can get so overly goal-oriented that they don’t end up enjoying the parts leading up to the orgasm. I work with a lot of women who have yet to have their first orgasm, and many of them can get so focused on trying to figure out how to get there that they inadvertently tune out the experience of being with their partner.

Try making a rule that neither you nor your partner will orgasm during a particular encounter. See if it allows you to deepen into the experience and enjoy each moment of being with each other.

9. Change Your Tempo

Really slowing down and taking your time with each other is a great way to feel more present in the moment and more connected with each other. Move your way through each activity slowly, really trying to savor the experience as if you were enjoying a multi-course meal at a fancy restaurant. Or you can go to the other extreme and try speeding things up with an intense quickie.

10. Masturbate In Front Of Each Other

You don’t even have to touch each other to create intimacy and intensity! Try masturbating in front of each other, either individually or both at the same time. Masturbating is a personal activity (perhaps the most personal activity we engage in as humans!), so bringing your partner into the experience can be very intense. This is an extremely erotic activity, and has the added benefit of helping each other learn how you like to be touched.

11. Above All Else, Invite Vulnerability

There’s one common thread running through all of these tips: being vulnerable with each other. Trusting in each other, exploring your boundaries with each other, and showing your full selves to each other is the best way to create more intimacy and intensity in your relationship. Keep allowing yourselves to take these risks, and your sex life will be sizzling for decades to come.

Curated by Erbe
Original Article