Having a an explosive, passionate orgasm can be the icing on the cake. But orgasming at the same time as your partner can be a very intense and rewarding moment. Cosmopolitan shares 8 ways to have the big O with your partner at the same time.

1. Give yourself the finger. If you need clitoral love during P in the V, buzzing a fingertip vibe—try the Frisky Finger ($11, PleasureChest.com)—on your clitoris during doggie is a game changer.

2. Get in before you start bar-hopping—not after. Alcohol makes you want to jump your partner’s bones, but it produces vasocongestion, down-there swelling that keeps him from going deep, which can make it harder for you to finish. Tequila is a cruel mistress.

3. Sex should not feel like Winter’s Bone. Lube the eff up, please (both you and your partner, before and/or during The Naughty). Almost 50 percent of women say lube makes it easier to orgasm. And forget the myth that it’s just for older women—all the cool kids are doing it.

4. Tell him to slide a finger (or two) into you while he uses his mouth on your Georgia O’Keefe. Internal and external play is twice as nice for your orgasm chances.