Quotes for long distance relationship lovers. Don’t worry the only thing you need to care about is your faith and trust on each other. A loving relationship will build with time.
Curated by Erbe
Original Source
Author: zfortadmin
What Men Want in Bed
Become the passionate vixen men can’t resist.
Want to know the deepest, darkest secrets to arouse a man with wild passion and games? Find out what men want in bed, and learn to be the sex goddess every man desires to be with.
Knowing what men want in bed isn’t rocket science. It’s actually really simple.
To become a sex goddess that your man would love and desire, you don’t need magic.
You just need to know these eight tips on what men want in bed.
What men want in bed
If you were to ask most men what they want in bed, you’re probably going to end up with a lot of vague answers.
And quite frankly, that’s because most men can’t really pinpoint what they want in a girl beyond great looks.
But it’s more than just appearances, it’s about looking into the sexual experience.
When would you, as a girl, say that the sex was great?
You’d obviously know you’ve had great sex when you experience a mind blowing experience that opens the flood gates of ecstasy down there!
So if you’re wondering what men want in bed, keep in mind that they want a girl who can give him an experience of a lifetime, every time.
Remember these eight tips to give him a sexual experience that worth screaming for!
So what kind of a girl do men want in bed? Here goes…
1. A girl who can experiment in bed
Do you like getting freaky in bed? Most lovers are too inhibitive to try new things in bed, and would rather stick with the tried and tested missionary. But don’t stop there. Every now and then, try a few new things to turn each other on.
Indulge in fooling around during foreplay, while you’re teasing each other. And remember not to try too many experiments when you’re actually having sex. Changing too many positions while having sex can actually make your man go limp. And that will not end well, what with him sitting against the bed post all huffy and upset.
Flirt Tactics That Confuse Guys
Trying to flirt with the hottie at the bar? Guys list flirting tactics that should be avoided:
- Taking Their Hat
- Patting His Head
- Call him Pet Names
- Let’s get “Lunch”
Curated by Erbe
Original Source
To The Women Whose Lives Are Not Love Stories
Here’s to the women whose lives are not love stories. To those who never expected to find happily-ever-after on their wedding day or the moment their eyes locked with somebody else’s across a crowded café. To the girls who grew up measuring success based on what they achieved for themselves – what they worked through, what they accomplished and what they did not let diminish them along the way.
Here’s to the damsels who pulled themselves out of distress and to the heroines who didn’t wait around to be saved.
Here is to women who grew up searching for the dreams that they wanted to realize and the people they wanted to become, not just the man who would sweep them away from the tragedy of their mundane existence. To the women who hoped that their lives would be thrillers, adventure novels, comedies and occasionally pornos but never predominantly romances. Never only a reflection of what they had to offer someone else. Here’s to the women who had bigger plans for the main character in their story.
Here’s to the women who grew up wanting more. More independence, more knowledge and more opportunity than they were ever expected to achieve. To the women who were taught to be quiet but found voices. To the women who were told to be chaste but chose passion. To the women who were taught to sit down and keep quiet but who chose instead to stand up and fight. Here’s to the women who never cared much for the fairy-tales that they were read. To the women who rejected the scripts that they were given and went on to write their own.
Here’s to the girls who grew up with dirty hands and skinned knees. Who wanted to experience the world first-hand and full-force, with no hidden intention or ambition of appearing desirable to somebody else. To the ladies who treated their bodies and minds as vessels – to experience, learn, grow and achieve, rather than simply to seduce and impress. To the women who wanted to be seduced themselves, with the wild intricacies of the world that surrounded them. Here’s to the women who knew that they deserved to explore with all the ferocity and passion of the heroes in their favourite childhood novels. Who didn’t wait for someone else to come along to show them the world.
Funny Friday: He Said. She Said.
A girl’s dream date may be a guy’s nightmare. In the classic he said, she said comedy form, two women and their men recount the unexpected pleasures and pain of the night before.
Curated by Erbe
Original Source
The Brutally Honest Phases Of A Man Falling In Love
Looking for an inner peek in to the mind of the guy you are dating? What phase are you in with your date?
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We all, men and women alike, might feel the same emotions when it comes to love, but the journey to finding love is an experience differentiated by gender. When women fall in love, they are filled with bursts of happiness and other mixed emotions, which a man will never be able to comprehend. Men on the other hand, are a completely different ballgame.
You see, unlike women who experience intense surges of affection as soon as they meet a guy, men experience a phase of emotions when they meet a woman. This article will explain the phases and journey a man undergoes before falling in love with a woman.
Phase 1. The “I Like You” Phase
Unfortunately, men are very shallow creatures. This initial stage is all about instant physical attraction. If you ever thought a guy initially liked you as a person …oh boy, were you wrong! Some women may fall in love during the first conversation, but sadly, in the beginning stages, men are only attracted to a woman’s physical appearance. Don’t be fooled by the idea of a ‘physical appearance.’
It does not include the whole package. Every man is different and enjoys different things about a woman. For example, most men are attracted by breasts (may it be small or large) and also by your curvy behind (again, may it be small or large). It’s never about the whole package, but more about a man’s specific appeal in a woman. Sometimes, a guy may not even realize what attracts him most in a woman, but if he has such feelings, he will begin the “I Like You” phase.
Phase 2. The Scouting Phase
Most guys find themselves attracted to a lot of women for many reasons, and as a result, they will “scout” to see which one of them will respond to their advances. Yes, men try to bait as many women as we can, at any given time. It’s only when a girl has passed the “scouting” phase (by accepting our small advances) that a man begins to focus his attention only on her.
These advances are very discreet and are not upfront flirting. A man basically needs that little confirmation that if he does start to chase you, something will happen. Even though he likes a woman, in this stage, he doesn’t really care about the outcome, so if she rejects him or doesn’t respond to his advances, he generally doesn’t feel a thing and moves on to another woman that catches his attention. Sure, there are exceptions, but generally, this is how guys think at this point.
Phase 3. The Chase
If a woman a man likes gives even the slightest positive response to his advances, he will start the chase. Sometimes those signs aren’t even obvious; he just believes in himself that you like him back, and as a result, he starts the chase. The chase is all about winning your attention. In this stage, a man’s aim is to get you to notice him and understand that he’s into you. Once this has become clear, and you have given him a shot (by agreeing to go out with him, etc.), he moves into the next phase.
Phase 4. The “I’m Going To Impress You” Phase
By this time, some women are actually starting to fall in love, but us men are not even close to it. This whole stage is all about making an impression on you. A man will do everything in his power to show you that he is a worthy mate. He plans dates; he floods you with gifts, and generally tries to make you happy whilst hoping to really impress you. It’s in this stage that many women (that have held out, until now) give in to a guy’s advances.
Phase 5. The “I Want You To Love Me” Phase
If a guy is having success so far, he wants to know that you love him. Gaining your love and commitment is his utmost highest achievement. Instead of falling in love with you, in this stage, all he worries about is how to make you fall in love with him. He might even show his relationship skills, thus proving that he is, indeed, a good lifelong partner. You might have already fallen in love by this stage, but this is when he needs to see it.
Phase 6. The Decision Phase
If a man makes it into this stage, it means you’ve clearly expressed your feelings, and he knows that he has managed to gain your love and commitment. Now, unfortunately, for both parties involved, all he did up to this point was prove to you that he is “exactly” what you are looking for in a man.
Because of this, two core problems arise:
-He wasn’t actually being himself 100 percent, so the man you’ve fallen in love with isn’t exactly the man you think he is.
-He never wondered if you’re actually right for him, since his desire to impress you was based purely on his INITIAL physical attraction.
It’s at this phase when a man finally starts to wonder if a real relationship may blossom here. It’s at this point when he starts to actually observe you as a real person (and I know this may sound shallow) and see if he actually likes you in this department. Finally, it’s at this stage when a man decides if you are worth trying a long-term relationship with. We ask ourselves: Do I love her? Do I want to be with her? Will I be happy with her? Is she the woman I want?
It’s easy for a man, even at this stage, to dismiss a girl based on some seemingly pointless reasons, but it’s how we are as a species. We are genetically engineered to “spread thy seed,” so the girl that a man does eventually decide to love and be with has to be perfect from his perspective. It’s also the same for a woman …the only difference is that she probably makes up her mind much earlier in the relationship.
Phase 7. The “I Love You” Phase
If the decision stage was negative, it’s at this stage when the guy will either dump you if you had a short relationship, or start ignoring you if it was just a fling. On the other hand, if he decided he does want to give love a try, he is now ready for it. The next three to four months will be the best stages of any relationship. He will give into his feelings and be overwhelmed with love. You will start to see him taking care of you, acting jealous and all the other great things about love.
It may seem harsh and unrealistic that a guy has to DECIDE whether or not he wants to fall in love, but we don’t always rationalize what we are doing. These things are imbedded into us at an instinctual level, and the fact that we DENY love early in these phases is only because it’s our defense mechanism preventing us from getting hurt.
Important Note: This is how a man falls in love if the woman he is after gives into all of his advances. If you want to turn a guy on his head, don’t give in to ALL OF HIS advances. Don’t say, “I love you” when he wants you to say it. Basically, turn his world upside down, and then, you’ll see a man falling helplessly in love, not being able to control his own emotions.
Curated by Tatiana
Original Source
The Secret to Intimacy
Love can be broken down into three categories; passion, intimacy and commitment. But what comes first and what leads to what? If you can’t choose to be intimate with someone, how can you make sure it sticks around? This week we meet real couples and investigate the secret behind intimacy.
Ladies In Bed, You Know What You’re Doing!
[Lesbians] have a few things to teach the rest of the world in the pleasure department and our ears are burning with anticipation, waiting to hear
According to the recent Kinsey Institute Journal of Sex Medicine Scientific Survey, Lesbians are having a lot more orgasmic fun than heterosexual and bisexual women too! The study determined that 75% of Lesbians orgasm with a familiar partner compared to 62% Straight Women, and 58% Bisexual Women.
This is not new for you. In 2006 an Australian study featured in the Journal of Sex Research also determined similar results. 76% of Lesbians compared to 69% of women who slept with men reached orgasm during sex.
Orgasmic Diva’s, you know how to experience more ecstasy together than other groups of women. This has got to be bottled! How about a spray on version that would positively affect a woman’s pheromones and enhance orgasmic responses to her particular brand of pheromones as a result?
Of course, one style orgasm does not fit all. Even to define orgasm can lessen the power and potency of the experience between two lovers. However it is fun to make an attempt at articulating this sensual mystery… orgasm is a kaleidoscope of physiological sensations, psychological feelings, sociological responses, as well as expansive and enlightening moments that can only be termed philosophical.
So let’s break down the WHY of your orgasmic mastery…
What Does Your Brain in Love Look Like?
Why do we crave love so much, even to the point that we would die for it? To learn more about our very real, very physical need for romantic love, Helen Fisher and her research team took MRIs of people in love — and people who had just been dumped.
3 Ways to Prevent a Sex-Starved Marriage
Is the key to your sexual success in your marriage center around communication? Do you and your spouse actively act out your needs and desires? We take a look at underlying issues that can help you communicate your wildest desires to get the passionate sex life you and your partner crave.
Do (or did) you and your spouse have significantly different levels of desire for sex? If so, you are not alone. Did you know that 1 in 3 couples has a sexual desire gap? But just because you aren’t alone, it doesn’t mean you should be complacent about a ho-hum sexual relationship. You shouldn’t. It can lead to a miserably angry spouse, infidelity and divorce. If you don’t believe me, watch this TEDx talk on The Sex-Starved Marriage
And although solutions to this sexual divide abound in magazines, self-help books and other pop psychology outlets, there is a little talked about fact underlying the problems associated with this sexual void.
The No’s have veto power.
Here’s the scoop. The spouse with lower sexual drive controls the frequency of sex — if she or he doesn’t want it, it generally doesn’t happen. This is not due to maliciousness or a desire for power and control, it’s just seems unimaginable to be sexual if one is not in the mood.
Furthermore, there is an unspoken and often unconscious expectation that the higher desire spouse must accept the no-sex verdict, not complain about it and remain monogamous. After decades of working with couples, I can attest that this is an unfair and unworkable arrangement.
This is not to say that infidelity is a viable solution to disparate sexual interests. It isn’t. As with all relationship conflicts, being willing to find middle ground is the best way to insure love’s longevity.
How to Regain that Youthful Love With Your Spouse All Over Again
Long term relationships needs nurturing and care to keep the fire and passion burning bright like Day 1. We love these 5 tips to ignite the empowered love that drew you in to your spouse.
Last month my daughter got married. During the ceremony, she and her husband gazed at each other adoringly and joy seemed to exude from every pore in their bodies. I found myself wondering, Have any two people ever been so in love?
Even as I squeezed the hand of my darling husband of 32 years, I felt as if I could never have been as much in love with him as my daughter was with her man on their wedding day.
Or maybe, I mused, love just looks more radiant on young faces. Could love possibly have a shelf life? Does it have “planned obsolescence,” like modern technology?
So I did a little research.
What I learned boils down to this: Even a marriage that’s about to smash up against the rocks (barring physical or emotional abuse or criminal acts) can tack its way back into calm and pleasant waters.
We’re not just talking about doing damage control. “It’s almost never too late to start the process of falling in love all over again,” says James Córdova, Ph.D., chair of Clark University’s psychology department and head of Clark’s Center for Couples & Family Research.
Taking Too Much for Granted
“One of the things that happens in long-term marriages is that the demands of everyday life steal our attention away from our partners — and paying attention to the other is crucial for happy relationships,” Córdova says. This lack of focus on your spouse slowly unravels the fabric of a solid relationship.
Sometimes the disintegration happens over a number of years, during which the couple exist in a kind of emotional limbo. Córdova notes that, statistically, it takes couples up to six years to seek help or advice after they’ve reached a tipping point. And that, he says, only increases the impact on the marriage.
Fritz Galette, Ph.D., a family therapist who hosts the weekly “Ask Dr. Fritz” on New York City’s WWRL, agrees. “By the time I see couples, they’re often in crisis,” he says. “The discontent has been festering for years.”
And yet experts believe that even in cases where the discontent has been on a low boil, there are still ways to revive the old passion.
5 Ways to Restoke the Fires of Love
Gallete and Córdova both recommend that couples in crisis seek professional help, whether from clergy or family/marriage therapists. On top of that, the following steps — first discussed and then put into practice — can help salvage a troubled marriage.
1. Act like you’re in a new relationship. Gallete recommends that couples ask each other the kinds of questions typical of new daters’ “getting to know each other” conversations.
Jill Kaplan*, whose 28-year-old marriage had been feeling flat, realized that she and her husband, Todd (names have been changed), had fallen so out of sync that the things she was doing to please him were actually annoying him. “I thought he wanted me to watch sports on TV with him,” she says. “I really didn’t always want to, but I kept it up for him.”
It took a close friend, who observed the tension in the family room, to get Jill to ask Todd if he really wanted her company. She got a surprising answer. “It turned out that he preferred not to have me there if I wasn’t into the game!” Jill says.
“That was just the first question,” she adds. “Now we’re on to which family we want to spend holidays with and what clothes the other wears that we really like. It’s like he’s my new boyfriend. It’s like I’ve discovered a favorite old outfit in my closet: Todd looks good to me and yet our relationship has the spark of something new and special.”
2. Pay attention to your spouse. One of the biggest complaints Gallete hears is that couples feel ignored by their mates. Spouses get used to one another and, over time, don’t really notice what they’re each going through.
“Sometimes people think they’re paying attention to their spouses but they really aren’t,” he says. “I advise couples to look into the other’s eyes when they’re having a conversation. It’s much easier to concentrate on someone’s words and share when your partner is looking right at you.”
Gallete also promotes an effective technique called active listening. “When one person speaks, the other can’t interrupt. He must listen completely before he says anything — and then he has to respond.”
3. Share new experiences. For years, relationship experts (and every women’s magazine) have been advising couples to set aside time for “date night.” Córdova says that going out and doing things together on a regular basis and creating romantic rituals is good for a relationship. But it’s even better to try something out of the ordinary. Get creative and step outside your comfort zone.
Gallete agrees. “Doing something new and different together, like taking tennis lessons — which is what my wife and I did recently — enhances your sense of intimacy.”
Karen and Bob Callahan, a couple who had thought their next step was divorce, breathed new life into their marriage when they reluctantly took a kayaking course together. “Neither one of us is particularly athletic, so when our pastor [whom they had seen for counseling] showed us a brochure, we both thought, Why not?” Bob says.
“Actually,” Karen adds with a laugh, “my first thought was, ‘If we both drown, it couldn’t feel as bad as how miserable I am now.’”
It turned out that kayaking didn’t take too much athletic prowess, and the two had a terrific time paddling around a local lake. “We started making up stories about the fancy houses we saw and soon we were laughing so hard we almost tipped,” Karen says. The weekend after they received their “certificate,” they booked a B&B on the lake, where they spent less time kayaking and more time just enjoying being together.
4. Be affectionate — physically and verbally. Research has established thattouch communicates a wider range of emotions than mere gestures. “The science of touch suggests that a pat on the back, a squeeze of the hand, a hug or an arm around the shoulder can save a so-so marriage,” writes Sonja Lyubomirsky, Ph.D., a professor of psychology at the University of California, Riverside. “Introducing more (nonsexual) touching and affection on a daily basis will go a long way in rekindling the warmth and tenderness.”
According to Córdova, however, this prescription for tenderness must also include loving language — and it needs to be heartfelt. “I love you” should be more than a reflexive recitation of syllables at the end of a phone call. Instead, say something affectionate and sweet at unexpected times.
Loving phrases can — and should — be sprinkled generously throughout your interactions. Tell your spouse he’s amazing while you’re eating dinner. Compliment your wife’s problem-solving abilities while trouble-shooting a plumbing problem.
5. Always be kind. “It’s not important whether your partner is ‘succeeding’ or ‘failing’ when your goal is to have a genuinely loving relationship,” says Córdova. “If your partner shows up late, no matter how annoyed you are, you can still respond with kindness.”
“When Bob and I began paying true attention to how we were communicating,” says Karen, “we realized that we were [venting] when we could have easily let the issue roll off our backs.”
So they tried an experiment. One Saturday they left a recorder running. “We were shocked when we listened to it later,” says Bob. “The way we were responding to each other made us cringe. It was exactly the kind of negative communication that makes people uncomfortable when they see it in others.”
To find a remedy for that habitual behavior, Bob and Karen made lists of 10 things the other did that bugged them and wrote down their usual responses. “Then we looked at each other’s lists and discussed how we could communicate our feelings without being hurtful,” says Karen.
Once you start being intentionally kind, says Córdova, “the interaction goes to a new place — the kind you would prefer in a happy marriage.”
But, he cautions, “Being kind when you’re not feeling that way takes practice. It doesn’t come naturally at first, but it can turn into a habit.”
What’s Old Is New Again
While we can’t realistically expect our long-term partner to be the exact same person we married, Córdova says, that may be a positive thing. “It’s like you have a whole new person there beside you — someone you can date, with all the benefits of already being married.” Ultimately, he adds, it’s not so much about going back to what you had before. It’s more about going forward and building something new and better suited to who you’ve each become.
Curated by Erbe
Original Article
8 Surprising Facts About Loving a Highly Sensitive Person
Energy takes on a different level with highly sensitive people. Learn ways to be loving and supportive to your partner and their needs with sex, bedtime, and alone time.
I’ve often wondered if I am some kind of freak.
I hated my job as a nurse for the smallest of reasons — the smell in the elevator before my shift would start, the physical exhaustion that would overtake me after 12 hours on my feet, the lack of any kind of privacy in the onslaught of the artificial, fluorescent lighting that buzzed even at 3 o’clock in the morning.
What’s more … any sort of violence makes me physically ill — I will never watch horror movies and I have to divert my attention even from road kill. Environment is super important to me — I prefer my house to be picked up, the lights to be dimmed, and a candle lit before I sit down to work, and wearing the wrong type of clothes can ruin my whole day.
In my marriage, I am often frustrated when my husband won’t have deep, philosophical discussions with me. I’m burning the midnight oil contemplating the meaning of life and he’s all like, “Eh, what does it matter? We’re all going to die anyways — I’m going to go watch TV.”
Turns out, there’s nothing really wrong with me and there’s nothing really wrong with him — I just might be a highly sensitive person.
I recently had the opportunity to chat with Dr. Aron, a self-professed highly sensitive person and author of The Highly Sensitive Person In Love, and her social psychologist husband Arthur, who identifies as a non-highly sensitive person, about the topic as they spent a quiet afternoon at home working on holiday cards.
According to them, about 20% of the population can be classified as “highly sensitive,” a genetic trait that affects how information is processed in the brain — and can also highly affect relationships.
Here are 8 important things I took away from the conversation:
1. Highly sensitive spouses may not know that they are highly sensitive.
One of the biggest sources of frustration for highly sensitive people, notes Dr. Aron, is that they are often times not even aware that they are highly sensitive — which can cause issues to arise, particularly in marriage. But there are clues that spouses can look for to help discern if his or her partner is highly sensitive, using the acronym DOES — Depth of Processing, Over stimulated, Empathy and Emotional Responsiveness, and Subtle Stimuli.
“A highly sensitive person thinks deeply … they think about the meaning of life more, they are the ones in the family who make sure they get their health check-ups,” Dr. Aron rattles off. “If you have children, they are the ones who run out of the room first. With husbands — they are often in their offices, for mothers, they look like they going crazy.”
2. Highly sensitive spouses need alone time.
Highly sensitive people, like introverts (although the two are not interchangeable), often have a deep need for alone time, to allow their brain ample time to process, a situation that can cause frustration among married partners. When a highly sensitive spouse feels the need for downtime, Dr. Aron suggests making one’s needs known — and being very clear about it. “You can just say, ‘I’m taking some down time, this is how long I will be gone,” she says.
And Arthur chimes in with the importance of making it clear that you are not wanting time away from your spouse — but just time away from, well, everyone. The couple also advises exploring ways to get down time together through quiet activities, such as hiking or sitting together reading.
3. Men are just as likely to be highly sensitive as women.
“As many men as women are born sensitive, but the stereotype is that women are sensitive, ‘real’ men are not,” Dr. Aron explains on her website. Arthur also points out that cultural norms influence how we view sensitive males, referencing a study that showed that in Canada, highly sensitive boys were ranked as the least popular, while in China, the most sensitive young males were also the most popular.
4. Highly sensitive people view sex differently.
“HSPs are more likely to find sex to be mysterious and powerful, to be turned on by subtle rather than explicit sexual cues, to be easily distracted or physically hurt during sex, and to find it difficult to go right back to normal life afterwards,” says Dr. Aron on her site. Keeping an open communication going in — and out — of the bedroom can help explore some of those different needs.
5. Bedtime might be a particular crisis.
In her book, Dr. Aron uses an anecdote of bedtime to illustrate the differences between a HS and non-HS spouse — she climbs into bed only to find her brain is too overly-stimulated to sleep, while her husband is quietly snoring within minutes. I found myself nodding along vigorously because that is my life. For example, my husband loves unwinding with TV before bed, but I find it way too stimulating. This always places me in the dilemma of whether to spend time with my husband before bed or take my own down time away from screens? I usually go back and forth, but more often than not, I just can’t shut down my own brain without a nice, dark room and no screens in my presence.
Sex IS not shameful – Shame IS hurtful
Feelings of shame can be devastating to our sex lives. One of the biggest obstacles many of my clients face in experiencing erotic pleasure is the sexual shame they have carried around with them since childhood.
So what exactly is sexual shame?
Well, none of us is born with shame! This feeling about sex may have been learned from our families, friends and peers, religious or cultural backgrounds. But this shouldn’t be a surprise to us because in our culture sex unfortunately is still very much a taboo. So many religions and customs have linked sex with shame or guilt that few of us escape entirely unaffected.
Many of us may have encountered shame for the first time as children. We were taught from a very early age not to touch our genitals, the implication being it was bad to do so. We were often given silly names to refer to our penis or vagina, as if to use the correct name was somehow offensive. And if we were caught masturbating or exploring our bodies while playing childhood games, we were told off and made to feel ashamed and guilty.
If Sex Was Like The World Cup
Goooaaaalll…. And you thought the World Cup couldn’t get any sexier.
Modern Love: Beyond Years
Tim and Sarah McEown never saw their 22-year age difference as an obstacle in their relationship, until Tim had a heart attack.
Curated by Erbe
Original Source